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How have unions helped teaching as a profession?
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This bowl is 💀
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Chief
Marrying someone from matrimonial site isn’t a bad idea. Bollywood has put this notion in our mind that love marriage is thrilling and arranged one is boring. There are great people out there. Whether you met with them via matrimonial site or somewhere else doesn’t really matter.
Also depending on what you are looking for, it’ll take at least 3 years to find someone and get married. Ask yourself if you’d be ok to get married at 28-29? If so, this is the right time to start the search.
I don’t know your parents but I’m sure they are very loving and supportive and won’t pursue their daughter to get married to someone she doesn’t like.
Chief
There is nothing wrong with getting married at an age you are comfortable at or not getting married at all. We are here clarifying OPs concerns.
DO NOT let anyone including your parents pressure you into this! Make sure that the family you marry into have views that align with yours and similar background (where were they raised - US or India, education, professional) Yes FAMILY - not just spouse. Ultimately the family ends up affecting your life in so many ways especially for a woman. You can’t prevent anything but you must do your due diligence. It’s your life at the end of the day. 25 y/o is nothing - you’re young. Develop your own life and become who u want BEFORE you get married - there won’t be a shortage of people trying to get in your way after. Also be aware, in law families tend to be super nice and supportive before marriage and it’s switch a flip once your married - esp if they weren’t “respected” enough. Anyways - I’m sure some people have amazing experience. The pt is - focus on YOU, establish yourself and your career, do your due diligence and then get married!
Chief
Oh Man! This sounds familiar.. Just create it, say you’re unwilling to compromise on whom you’re looking for, and reject the proposals because they don’t match your criteria. Pardon the expression but just throw them a bone to chew on for a bit.
Don’t get married just to get married. That being said, I got married at 24. It was a family pressure at the beginning, I cried my soul out before meeting the Boy, but after I met him, everything changed drastically and we are happily married for 10 years now. You never know when the right person kicks in. So make your family understand you are open to see boys but you should not feel forced to get married just because family thinks that is a right match. That feeling needs to come within yourself.
Chief
D3: There is no way to prove or determine X or Y person is right fit for a spouse or a friend. You have to judge by the way a person talks and your instincts.
In simplest words a marriage is largely a gamble which changes to meaningful relationship with both partners willing to respect and adjust for each other.
Get married only if you feel it is right (who and when). Don’t let anyone rush you. Don’t!
Chief
Move out if you live at home.
Stop talking to them for a bit if you dont live at home.
They need to learn to respect boundaries and cutting them out for a bit will help.
Not stupid at all. It is actually a great advice.
Pro
Damn, already at 25? You’s still a youngin’
I feel like I wrote this post myself. I’m in the same boat! DM me if you want someone to rant with
Just be firm and do not marry until you are ready. There’s only till a certain point they can force you. 29F here, not married yet!
Chief
Parents have FOMO that marrying kids late could risk getting fewer prospective matches.
Our generation has the FOMO of missing out Fun and independence associated with being single.
Does everyone around really live the bachelor life shown in movies?
Comes down to your personal choices.
Chief
It’s about feeling right about entering a partnership. Some of us like our space & independence and isn’t about this “fun” singledom you see in movies.
You are too early to get bothered like this.
Let them know when do you want to get married.. Parents might be thinking that whole process will take 3-4 years, and you will be 28-29 by then. Generally Indian parents think that it is difficult to get married after 30 if you are arrange marriage case.
Chief
Sometimes parents use the marriage as a bait for kids to disclose if kids are already in a serious relationship with a friend or colleague.
By current society standards around 30 seems to be a norm for marriage.
I will agree with one of the comments above, meet the person and see. One of my friend didn’t want to get married and was just irritated when parents brought the topic. Finally he met the girl and liked her so much that he started pushing for marriage within 2-3 months.
Don’t just follow what parents are asking but keep an open mind.
Chief
More importantly, it’s external people who fill parents’ ears. “There must be someone!”
The biological clock is somewhat true. Again it is a combination of male / female reproductive health. If you are super excited about having baby(ies) of your own, they may have an angle.
Coming from a guy who was childless for long time. I was 27 M and wife was 25 F, iam not generalizing, but we both never thought it was such an ordeal to conceive a child. Heartbreaking decade plus, monetary lossess, pain and what not.
Not trying to scare you, but quoting my exp.
D2 100% agreed. We got married at 29 and wanted few years just for us. Had our first born at 36 and second at 39.
you may meet the right person at 25....and get the wrong guy at 35 ..or vice versa ..its not about the age...biological clock definitely yes...you are at pink of your health at 25 not 30 or above .... this is in general (there are ppl who r very healthy even at 45 but smaller fraction)...if you dont believe join the fertility bowl and see the painful experience of several folks who only repent and regret on not deciding things early..
No point in talking to someone who resorts to name calling. I’m disengaging from this conversation ✌🏻
Conversation Starter
25M, parents are pushing me too. Let’s connect
OP 🤪
I think if you’re not in the space to think about it and there’s no need to prioritize then don’t, if you want to date around it is healthy to. I think date for a bit year or so and then think about it.