{ "media_type": "text", "post_content": "Any moms who really badly wanted a girl but ended up with a boy(s)? How do you feel now? Do you still want a girl? Would you try again? Does it matter really, or was it just in your head? \n\nHad a difficult relationship with my mom growing up, so always wanted that closeness with my future daughter. FTM having a boy and a little disappointed, but feeling guilty for that too. Difficult pregnancy so likely won't have another. But I want a girl. 🤷🏻‍♀️\n\nPlease no woke left gender drama responses. Thanks.", "post_id": "609300fc05db9600288d650f", "reply_count": 39, "vote_count": 7, "bowl_id": "5a0c9a1f61b01a001937c406", "bowl_name": "Working Moms" }

Any moms who really badly wanted a girl but ended up with a boy(s)? How do you feel now? Do you still want a girl? Would you try again? Does it matter really, or was it just in your head? Had a difficult relationship with my mom growing up, so always wanted that closeness with my future daughter. FTM having a boy and a little disappointed, but feeling guilty for that too. Difficult pregnancy so likely won't have another. But I want a girl. 🤷🏻‍♀️ Please no woke left gender drama responses. Thanks.

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With my first and second, I had really hoped for a girl. And got two amazing boys. They are now 19 and 15. I am extremely close with them. The relationship you have with your children is the one you create. I have time set aside each day that's dedicated one-on-one for each of them, before bed. We spend anywhere from a half hour to an hour just hanging out. Talking about anything and everything. With my teens, they know that no topic is off-limits. We've covered everything. But in a way that is open and gives them a safe space to ask questions. We joke around. A lot. My oldest talks to me about cars, about school, about wanting a girlfriend, about life. And the hugs. Omg, hugs from my boys are the best! Try to live in the moment, and enjoy them as they grow. I do have a little girl now, she's 6. I do a lot of the same stuff I did with my boys with her: we do science experiments, she plays sports, she plays minecraft (ironically, both of my boys played that when they were younger). She likes to be active, and she's creative. Just like my boys when they were younger. The one thing I'm not doing? Fighting to get those stupid hot wheels/matchbox car tracks together. Lol but I am spending ridiculous money on dolls. What you're feeling is normal. Just don't let it ruin your relationship with your son. And it's OK to shower your son with affection and let him know that you're his safe space.

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Conversely I had a wonderful relationship with my mom and always thought I’d be devastated if I didn’t have the opportunity to replicate it with a daughter of my own. I now have 2 boys and don’t plan to have a third. I occasionally get a twinge of sadness thinking that I’ll never know what it’s like to parent a daughter but it’s generally fleeting as I’ve come to realize that for me it’s the experience of parenting period that is so rewarding (when it’s not exhausting) If you find it hard to move on from the disappointment it may be worth talking to someone about it. In particular of you think there’s a part of you that believes you can fix the past if only you had a daughter of your own. Its totally ok to experience some level of disappointment but you don’t want it to cloud the whole experience and the relationship with your son. Congrats on your son. They’re great too and I’m sure you’ll find it easier than you may think to form an incredible bond with him.

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My MIL has 2 boys and it’s been 4 generations in their family without a girl . She so much wished for a girl every pregnancy and when she didn’t have finally she promised herself that she would love her DIL to the core. And today when I broke down to her that it’s so challenging to work FT, being pregnant and manage a toddler - she calls my husband and says it’s not easy being a mom and he should be more supportive. She also told that he should think about taking time off or be a SAHD if the family needs it. It’s not the same love as mother but it’s great to hear have a MIL like this

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Yes. My MIL has 2 boys and always wanted a daughter, so she is super sweet and loving to me. Too bad she's in another country so I rarely interact with her. Looking forward to her visiting next year to help with baby.

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I had 2 girls that I loved with all my heart. My third pregnancy was a boy and I was concerned I wouldn’t love him like I do my daughters. The moment he was born I fell instantly in love. Throughout my pregnancy I questioned what it would be like.

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So glad to see responses like this here. I asked a similar question about whether people were nervous about having a boy after having a girl or vice versa on a pregnancy app and everyone was like: nope! lol. I have a girl and just found out I’ll be having a boy this time around and sort of wanted another girl because she’s so great, it’s hard to imagine anything different. Funny thing is, the first time around I thought I wanted a boy, but the little girl stole my heart. I’m guessing the same thing will happen again. I’ll have to wait until October to find out.

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I really wanted a girl but had a boy. It took me a couple of days after we found out the gender to make peace. But all through my pregnancy, the thought of having a girl kept coming back to me! After giving birth and holding my little one, it’s been such a joy! Not that I don’t miss having a girl, but I love this boy more than I thought I would.

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I have two kids roughly 12 years apart. First was a boy when we expected a girl. I adjusted pretty easily. I love him sooo much! Second we knew we were having a girl, I secretly hoped it would be another boy so I was disappointed. When she arrived I was smitten. Now she’s almost 8 and I’m glad we have one of each. I know pregnancy can be hard on you, and there are no guarantees. I have a close friend who had to have a pic line in for two pregnancies for hyperemesis. The third she had no issues at all.

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I really wanted a girl and was worried about having a boy. Turns out, I’m much more of a boy mom and now couldn’t imagine it differently. Likely not having more and not upset about it. I’d honestly probably want a boy if we did have another. Boys are awesome. But don’t feel bad about being kind of bummed. That feeling fades pretty quickly.

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I wanted a girl and ended up with 2 boys. Didn’t try for a 3rd cause the thought of another baby and it not being a girl might disappoint. Growing up I was occasionally reminded that I was an unexpected and initially unwanted accident, cause I was the 4th daughter. But I had a great childhood and awesome relationship with my siblings...not so much with my mom, but she’s come around and I adore her. Life is weird and hard, try to see your mom from her eyes and what you know abt her own experience - it might change how you feel about her. My perspective is this: God gave me 2 boys b/c He knew I’d need to feel that love more than from a daughter...plus girls are extremely tough sometimes. I have a step daughter who is constantly at odds with her dad b/c he parents and has boundaries. Kids are tough work! In the end, I haven’t lost hope on having my girl... fostering or adoption is an option. Don’t feel bad. This is the one choice in life you have zero control over - relish in the fact that God, or the universe, made the best decision for you knowing all things about you. Best of luck - motherhood is awesome. Little boys bring home beautiful art work for their mamas!!

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I wanted my second to be another girl, but it was a boy. Still getting used to the idea of being a “boy mom” (he’s 6 weeks) but totally in love with him so I’ll get over it. Definitely not trying for a 3rd just to get another girl!

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I just want to encourage you that no matter the gender of your baby you are going to fall in love with them . Remember you are not your mother🙏🏾

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I wanted a girl and had a boy. Took me about a week after I found out the gender to adjust to the idea and once I had him, I couldn’t imagine it any other way. Same story for all of my friends who wanted one gender and had the other. I’m pregnant with my second now and we are waiting to find out the gender until the baby is born which I never would’ve been able to do with the first but after experiencing my love for my son, I know it won’t matter what the gender is. That said, my son LOVES women, old women, middle aged women, little girls, baby girls and is meh with other little boys so I am kind of hoping it is a girl for his sake!

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Let us know what you are having when you find out! 🎉 Congratulations!

Growing up I always knew I would have two girls. Clearly I knew nothing as I have two little boys. When we were told baby 1 was a boy. I cried and then got over it. When pregnant with 2 I KNEW this was it finally, a girl aaaand BOY. I cried (and felt awful since my first boy had my entire heart and I genuinely thought I couldn’t love another boy more) again, I knew nooothing. I am smitten and head over hills over my two boys. I thought I wouldn’t be able to relate. I’ve learned that being a boy or a girl is nothing more than a label. Boys can be emotional and share their feelings and love hugs just as much as girls and the other way around. So, whatever you have, it will be perfect and absolutely unique, let that be one baby or two or three or more. All boys all girls combined, whatever it is, is perfect for your family and you’ll be fully in love with them as little persons beyond their sex. What you feeling is absolutely normal and it’s ok to “grieve” the idea of what you lost. You’ll earn SO much more ♥️

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I have two boys and wouldn’t change either of them for girl. The bond between them is incredible to see. They are so sweet, funny, and incredibly empathetic. If you raise them in a loving way, there is no reason they won’t be close to you once they’re older or married. And there’s no guarantee having a girl means you’ll be close to her. I know plenty of women who don’t get along with their moms.

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I only had sisters growing up and all girls in my neighborhood. When I found out my first child was a boy, I didn't know what to do with a boy! He's 7 now and wonderful. And so much like me as a kid with a big imagination and a big heart! In the end, we love our little ones for the people they are inside ❤

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I’m pregnant with my second now and really want a girl, after having a boy first. Everyone keeps telling me they think it’s a girl and I won’t find out for another few weeks (I’m only 13 weeks now) but I’m really hoping it is! I keep telling myself it’s also great if it’s a boy because I don’t want to be disappointed- but I know that either way I’ll love my baby with all my heart. If having a girl is really important to you, just trying for a second baby seems like not the greatest plan because it’s a 50/50 chance. It could be worth looking into IUI/IVF because they can choose an embryo that’s a girl (I think) - but that’s an expensive, painful, and long process so may not be worth it.

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But even IVF is not a sure thing. I really wanted a girl, but I had only one viable embryo after two egg retrievals. So now I'm pregnant with a boy. It took me a few days to accept it, and now I'm just excited about having a child period.

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Similar to you, I wanted a girl due to my dad leaving when I was a kid. Wanted my daughter to have a normal loving father daughter relationship. I knew right away I was having a boy but I bawled during my 18 week ultrasound after the tech confirmed he was a boy. I felt like I was losing my dream. He turns 5 this week and I still think back how crazy I sounded because I love him beyond words. I had a girl 2 years later and oh my does she push my buttons. She is sassy and fierce but I finally got the girl with the best bond with her father. I know it’s hard to imagine now but you will be beyond blessed by your son- they LOVE their mamas! I already told my husband if we decide on #3 that I want another boy. I don’t think the world could handle another clone of my daughter 🙃

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I was so sad when I found out I was having a boy as I wanted a girl and dress up and cute clothes and as I call them identification bows. But my little boy is so sweet. They love their mamas

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Yes. I wanted to have a girl after my first was a boy, and I felt really down about it for two weeks after finding out. I knew I didn’t want to try for a third child. I felt like I couldn’t talk about how I felt because I was lucky to have a healthy baby right? Fast forward to now, my younger boy is so sweet, affectionate, and such a mamas boy. He’s such a joy. Yeah it’s sad I won’t get to do mommy daughter things or buy girls clothes but I’ve come to terms with it.

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3 boys and love them! Remember it’s not the gender, it’s the personality. Two of My boys are sweeter and more loving than my sisters crazy girl. Life is simpler with boys, less drama and less to worry. But I worry when they marry it’ll be diff

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So true about the personality not the gender.

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I have one of each and boys loooove their mama. There is nothing else like it!

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Gender disappointment is real. I’m 36 weeks and I wanted a girl. I had a list of girl names and I had her name picked out. For my son, I’m still on the fence about his name and I’m waiting to see him to make it real. I still feel a little disconnected from him but I am also a FTM. Nothing but girls in my family so this is the first boy. I love my son regardless. This pregnancy has been tough as I’m 35. I’m not sure if I will be able to conceive again and honestly if I can, I want to try to pick the sex so I can have a girl.

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