Any other lawyer have trouble advocating for themselves in their own every day conflicts? I’m assertive for my clients but my downstairs neighbor is being unnecessarily rude and I’m at a loss

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*downstairs* neighbor? did you explain to them that this battle is already over; you have the high ground?

On an unrelated note, are you familiar with Riverdance?


I really assumed that link would involve Obi Wan having the high ground in some way. Ideally while tapdancing. But I wasn't disappointed


Exactly my issue. My upstairs neighbors bang every minute of every day...and I still never manage to say anything.


I used to have this issue but I got better as I got older. I’m a bit over 35 now and it’s taken a lot of work on myself to have the confidence to stand up for myself.


Honestly I just read books about having confidence and really really worked not to sabatoge/undermine myself and deliberately went out of my way to advocate for myself. It was a lot of work and it really only took effect as I got older. When I was in my 20s especially my career was difficult bc I was always subjected to the “male gaze” (that’s a sociological term) and I just always felt like I was lesser - unless I was advocating for a client then I was a total boss. It’s a weird thing. I’d look into some confidence building books, i also journal, and even reading feminist literature about how we as women are trained by society to stay subservient May help. My issue was a mix of sexist conditioning and my own personal confidence issues which were not completely based on sexism. I really did get better so just be patient with yourself.

ah so the solution with upstairs neighbor involves a little bit more technology.

my preferred implement is the broomstick, but a mop will do. Find the point on the ceiling nearest the source of noise, and bang hard several times.

Usually shuts em up. If they're the type that that doesn't shut up, you need to step your passive aggressive game up a notch. complaints to super, complaints to landlord, complaints to police, anonymous tip to the DEA...


The broomstick is tried and true. Until you learn you live beneath a defensive lineman on the school’s football team. Recourse dries up real fast there.


I lived next door to a crotchety older Boomer once. She was awful and being assertive only made it worse. One day I had to talk to her about fixing something of ours on the property line, and it's like a switch flipped. Maybe you can find a way to do a favor for this person and change the temperature?


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