Any thoughts on how to space kids apart in age? Currently have 7mo old and thinking about 2nd. (Above 35 yo btw).

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I really wanted mine to be 2-3 years apart and I've now had 2 miscarriages as we try for the second. Don't worry about spacing. You'll handle whatever spacing life gives you. Any gap will have its pros and cons

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Don't know if you can plan these things... Had my first when I was 35 and was planning on having another fairly soon so they'd be 2 years apart. Did get pregnant but then had a miscarriage and assumed I couldn't have anymore. But then got a surprise pregnancy and my kids are 4 years apart. It was a shock to the system to have an infant when your older one's potty trained and you feel like you're over the hump. But now, I really love having that age difference because I feel like I can focus more on the baby than I would've been able to with a 2 year old. This is a very long winded way of saying that whatever happens, it'll be good so do what you think you're ready for!

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I wanted 2 years between and ended up with 3. I'd rather "go thru hell" and then be out of it with all kids than have to re-adjust to the sleep deprivation and diapers after making it over the hump. Agree with prior poster. I've debated a third and decided- it's too much. In another life with another job I'd have a big family.

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I had my first two at 31 and 33. It's pretty hectic with two kids that need a lot of attention but now that they're 3 and 5 it's nice that they're close in age. Our last is coming this year when I'm 37. As d1 said it's a bit tough to go back to diapers and sleepless nights but at the same time I'm happy the other two are pretty independent so I can focus on the baby.

Our first two are 18 months apart, and the youngest 2 years behind that. It was basically hell early on, to the point that my husband and I may not make it (but we had a really rocky relationship to begin with). That said, kids are all good friends, which is the upside and the point of having them so close together.

Thanks all. This is helpful. Of course the ability to have the 2nd is up to luck or higher powers but glad to know the ups and downs, it's hard but manageable.

Follow up q - for those that did,was there a financial analysis considered in going for #3? I feel like 2 will already be so much more, don't know how we would manage w 3, even if we would like to have more.

Yup tough to plan. We've been lucky. Wanted close, have 3 under 4. All done. We'll be young when they're old enough to move out.

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