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I am a twin and would offer this:
1. Take time to spend time with each of them individually. They will always be viewed as a pair, even in to adulthood. Giving them individual space will be treasured.
2. We’re identical. Either way let them explore individual interests. It’s too easy to pile them in the car together and head off to the same activity activity.
3. For good or bad they have a build in best friend for life. Encourage them to develop their own independent friendships.
My two cents.
That's interesting, I didn't think about these things in the first place. Much appreciated!
Rising Star
Hire a full time nanny between age 0-5, then after school sitter after 6, find meal delivery and outsource yard work, and one parent takes back burner job.
Pro
Yes. One parent needs to have a job that makes it easy to “flex” and take the kids to dr appointments, etc.
Twin mom here + 2 other kids. I work from home and my job is super flexible. I might have some morning meetings but I finish my work at night or during the weekend. Idk how we could manage if I didn’t have a flexible job. & My husband is a manager so he can go in late or come home early if needed.
Getting a flexible job for one of us looks promising. Thank you for your input!
Mother of teen twins here. My advice is, if you can afford it, hire a nanny. Having a nanny gave me time to do other things like exercise, cooking, part time work and taking care of my other 2 kids too.
It does make sense. Thanks for your input!
Any recommended way to search for a nanny? We live in the UK.
Good luck! Our twins head to college (one west coast, one east coast near where we live) in two weeks. I did a lot of crazy driving for a while.
I work with a tax partner who has two sets of twins, ages 1 and 3. She made partner right before her younger set turned 1.
She always talks about how since she’s obviously crazy busy as a partner at work, she’s learned to just thrive on the chaos and focus on just the kids when she’s not working. She’s always in the office because zero chance of her getting anything done with four small kids at home. Her husband works remotely, but he can’t work a demanding job while watching four kids. They have a couple babysitters all day during work hours and some family help.
She says spending the money on fulltime babysitting and on outsourcing other household tasks like having a cleaner, etc. allows her to have quality time with just the kids the few hours she has free.
Our tax group is also pure insanity with hours, so she always blocks out a few hours each evening to log off, even if it means she’s working until 2-3 AM during the fall (everyone below works that late then too, but as a partner who is in charge, she’s 100% working more than everyone).
That's too much to think about. Two sets of twins, still managing work and trying to live a quality life! We are enough with one set of twins. Family support is very much needed but unfortunately we are in a different country than our parents and finding it difficult to cope up with tasks. I believe that hiring a nanny or getting kids in a playgroup seem sensible options for us.
24 yr old twin here, my parents both worked when we were born and they also had a 3rd child (4yr old). Hiring out tasks like meal prep & laundry helped them a lot when we were young. And hiring a nanny.
Makes sense! Thanks!