Anyone else get frustrated when a manager ‘thinks’ they’re being helpful by actively telling you that a lot of the stuff you do to help manage your ADHD is unnecessary and there’s a better way to do it? Like they mean well, but even when I try to tell them I do it for a reason they think I’m just being difficult - e.g. work in a team room with headphones on, have a physical to do list, have a bunch of tabs/docs open at one time, bring a second monitor, take regular short breaks etc.

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None of the things you listed here seem out of the ordinary. What specifically did the manager say regarding you being difficult?

I totally understand where you are coming from. I had a manager that made comments like that and it was so frustrating. I think she really did think she wa helping but she wa doing the opposite.

I’d probably inform them (but like, nicer than this) that it’s the way you work best and manage your workload, and that they should recognize that everyone has different working styles. And potentially asking if they’d like to have a separate 121 feedback session about your work in general and how they feel you can improve.
If they don’t want to do that, giving upwards feed back by being direct with them and letting them know that the constant comments are making it more difficult to do your work isn’t a bad route in my opinion

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