Anyone else struggle with being "likable" at work? Lady 🐠 especially. Is it something you can truly control? How badly can it hold you back?

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It's more important to be liked at work than it is to be good at your job.

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Women sort of can't win. We're either assertive and not "likeable." Or we're super likeable and don't have enough "presence."

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I struggled with this for a long time until I stopped caring and just started being my weird lady self. It's really easy to be likeable as a person by just being a person... its a lot harder to be respected.

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Honestly I had to stop caring about being likeable to get stuff done. Take charge women are rarely considered likeable but as a producer, with the deadlines we have now, it's either take charge or miss the delivery. I don't know how it's affected how liked I am, but i get the job done and that's all I care about. I've never been "popular" (ever) and I do work somewhere where "fitting in" is considered really important and it might honestly be holding me back for a promotion, but I'm pregnant and my priorities have shifted.

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Being liked goes a long way. People want to work with people they like. That's true internally and especially for clients.

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This is an industry that confuses charisma with character. I am not a naturally charismatic person so I try to have a really strong character and treat people well. It takes longer but pays off.

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Depends on the environment. At my first job I was pretty highly respected and given lots of opportunity. At my last job I was never taken seriously, told I should be more likeable, and eventually laid off.

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I'll take a likable person that needs a little coaching, over an asshole that nobody wants to work with any day of the week.

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Have the same feeling. And I'm normally awkward. it's a very frustrating thing at work. Not the advice you want to hear but all I do is try to make it not feel it bothers me.

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Being liked and being likeable are two separate things for some people, especially at larger agencies where it's hard to develop relationships with the people who hold your fate in their hands.

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It's definitely more important to be good at your job. Useless people, however likable they are, are a waste of time and money.

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I've seen careers made on being likable - as long as your baseline competent. I think that people are so stressed out in general that when a likable, joyful person comes into a room, they are always welcome and reassuring. It's like a massage for the soul. You just want that person to be around.

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Sadly this industry hires more people who can wear multiple masks and be good with everyone (like me) vs the slightly standoffish awkward introvert. There's so much value in both, it sucks most people dgaf and only want to work with people that are just like them.

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Now I do! I've always been really engaged by my previous teams and enjoyed them as people which made me think I was a likable person since we developed great friendships. Now I work here and feel so fucking unliked by my team therefore wonder if I should say fuck it and not care.

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if you're charismatic, then you're charismatic. so if you're liked in life, you're probably liked in the work world.

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I think I'm likable. I'm an old media 🐋 and make time with millennias as well as my peers. I have no disire to build a super career. So Its my boss who I struggle with. She loves people who kiss up to her and do their thing at work. I just call BS on this media industry and I guess I'm just not down with the kool aid posse. Oh and by the way, Yes, I have had some delicious red wine 🍷. Only way I can survive.

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It's all about "fit." There are some places you'll fit and others you won't. Some work cultures are just fucking weird. Be yourself and find what works for you, while doing your job as best you can. At that point if people don't like you, just say fuck it and leave.

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Le sigh. Resident asshole here. Sorry for having standards and trying to elevate the caliber of work.

You have to be diplomatic and you have to be able to make change. It's always good to have a VP level spirit walker that believes in what you're trying to do.

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Nah. All you have to do is say nice things about people. They are all shallow enough to believe you mean it.

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"Popular" by Mitch Prinstein is a great read. It elaborates on the science of likability, the differences between popularity and likability and how people tend to embrace the former over the latter, and the consequences of those predispositions

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