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It’s important to understand the Partner(s) OP’s cousin will work for. Any deals you feel are “audit 2.0” or whatever you call it must be a low budget, limited scope deals with no value impact (likely brought in by newer Partners). These deals are essentially completed by off-shore teams ...
I've been in both groups and currently in KPMG DAS. I had no WLB at Deloitte. Almost impossible to take my vacation time there. Never worked with the same group but maybe twice over a long period. If you are the "new guy" going into a new team and client for every engagement, you are going to have a rough time as you won't have the support at year-end to get the promotions and bonuses you are looking for.
At KPMG, it is a much more collegial environment (other than some ex Deloittisns who want want to run over everyone to get ahead). I can actually have more say over my career here. Most of the partners I worked with are just as successful as the ones at Deloitte but they are better leaders. At KPMG they use their teams generally like valuable resources rather than often at Deloitte the teams got used up.
I could make more money to leave KPMG but I would lose the good WLB I have now. An extra 10-20k isn't worth it. KPMG paid me more than Deloitte to come over anyway. Now Deloitte wants to hire me back at more than KPMG. My question to them was why didn't you pay that $$$ in the first place?
One thing to think about in the turbulent times we have now. KPMG Is more risk-averse. That is a good and bad thing. They might pay a bit less than some firms but they weathered the initial Covid hit very well. I know of only one person let go in my group. Whereas 10 of my highly talented previous Deloitte colleagues were let go for asinine reasons. Explain how you got a 1 or 2 (top ratings at Deloitte) and then 6 weeks later get fired for "low-performance"?