{ "media_type": "text", "post_content": "Been dating a girl for a while now. Just found out one of her guy friends who she hangs out with regularly she has slept with in the past. She says it's been years. Should it bother me?", "post_id": "58139c728b82ae1300b89509", "reply_count": 30, "vote_count": 2, "bowl_id": "564a5cdb94887803001dd07c", "bowl_name": "Accounting", "feed_type": "crowd" }

Been dating a girl for a while now. Just found out one of her guy friends who she hangs out with regularly she has slept with in the past. She says it's been years. Should it bother me?

like
Posting as :
works at
You are currently posting as works at
Highlighted IconHIGHLIGHTED

I don't think it's a big deal at all. I understand the hesitation to tell you but most friend groups I know of have a ton of "friendcest" so it would be unavoidable. It comes down to confidence in the relationship and being secure in who you are.

like

Does she have a lot of male friends that she hangs out with? If yes, watch out. If no, it could be that one in a million relationships where they can be friends despite having swapped DNA in the past. You're a guy. How many women do you know that you find attractive and, given no societal constraints, you'd want a purely platonic relationship with?

like
Recent IconRecent

So she lied but regretted lying about it? She may have been using a form of protective buffering by not telling you the whole truth. If she was sincere about it now, I wouldn't let it get to you. Give her the benefit of the doubt on this issue.

like

Any girl who says "I just had sex with him. Never had feelings" is lying. Sorry. She slept with him cuz she had feelings for him. Could they go away? Absolutely! Could they come back? Absolutely.

like

She def has some attachment to that dude. Let her go.

like

Don't play yourself🔑

like

She doesn't feel bad about lying. She feels bad she got caught lying

like

Technically no, but it would bother me. How did she respond when you brought it up?

like

Answering your question, how should we know what bothers you and doesn't? Usually in these questions you say it "bothers me" and then ask, do I a have a point?

like

I wouldn't like it at all. I'd tell her how you feel. I certainly wouldn't do that to my s/o. Why the hell does he/she have to hang out with a person he/she slept with in the past when they're dating someone. Blows my mind.hanging out alone is inappropriate hanging out with a group is fine. Hanging out alone is just asking for trouble imo whether you trust the person or not. But hey that's just me.

like

Yeah. It should bother you. Go date a virgin instead. Less drama, but more clingy.

like

She probably didn't want to lose that friend (thinking you wouldn't want her hanging out with him) and didn't want to lose you either. She's dating you (and has been) and not dating him. If she slept with him while you were dating, then yes it should bother you.

like

Honestly I wouldn't be okay with it if my SO slept with someone who he regularly hangs with especially if he didn't tell me openly. I can understand why she didn't tell you - she was afraid of losing you or him or both. However, if they hang out alone - id say f that. If they hang out in a group - I would still be a little iffy about it. If they got drunk together - oh hell no. But if it's someone who we hang out with together (yes the thought would make me cringe) but I would be more comfortable being there when they hang out.

like

^ wow

like

^maybe she'll get drunk and end up sleeping with the guy while they are dating. Lol shit happens

like

They should not be friends.... end of story

like

Another reason I'm glad I'm gay. No one really gives af.

like

Someone's defensive of their sex like

like

Not telling me would bother me. But the friendship itself isn't a problem.

like

It would bother me. Like I know my SO wasn't a virgin when we met. We talked about our history and exes and all that jazz, but I want it left in the past. I just can't imagine someone else with my SO, it makes me sick. But to be in the presence of someone I know who had? Doesn't sound like a good time.

Plus, I dont understand how someone is "just friends" with a previous hookup? How does that work? Ive slept with girls I've been dating and done 1 night stands. After each had ran its course, I've never felt compelled to stay in contact with that person (unless I wanted more hookups). Either way, I would never bring a girl around my fiancé who I had slept with. Just out of respect.

like

Was she dating him or just a hook up? I would be bothered either way, but more so if she had had feelings for him.

like

Additional Posts in Accounting

Can anybody refer me for AWS Admin/Cloud Engineer position? I'm not getting any leads/response. Any help would be much appreciated.

like

Anyone resigned today ?

Weekly Mondoscopy scheduled for later today...

Post Photo
likefunny

What’s the best way to get into UX/UI design? I’m a traditional in-house senior graphic designer but at my job it’d be a helpful skill to know. Did you guys just do a boot camp or separate trainings? What worked for you?

like
like

Can I negotiate a Microsoft offer with a verbal offer from Google? Or do they need a written offer?

like

I’m getting ready to start my FT position as a HUC (Health Unit Coordinator) in Labor and Delivery. I know it will be a while before I do anything of the sort, or IF I do anything of the sort. But I wondered if there were any other HUCs on here who crosstrained? (Wether as a PCT Patient Care Tech, Medical Records, or Telemetry?) was it worth it?

like

How do you answer the question about yourself in i-944 where you can indicate "self" and it asks you if you live with said individual "self", and if this individual is filing for an immigration benefit with you or has in the past (again it's weird because you're talking about yourself.. ).

Does TCS Bangalore provide Cab services (pick up and drop) for anyone who's shift starts from 4 am.

P.s- office is 22 km from location of stay.

like

Any Trendy cocktail bars around flatiron, Washington square park recommendations?

like

Who can share some tips for helping a CW with their craft? I’m coaching one that needs to work on details and accuracy. I have a copy of “Elements of Style” to give them and will be talking to them

like

Any suggestions on moisturizer for oily and acne prone skin?

like

How hard is it to go from L7 to L8? How long do promotions take and what needs to happen? Thank you

like

Work from home has been great for many reasons, but the confession part of this post is how much a loud, disorganized, chaotic environment raises my stress levels. I’ve realized that I can be so much more productive in a quiet home office. But I know some people like the “energy” of a corporate office.

Related question: Do any of you wear noise canceling headphones, and if so, does that work to increase productivity?

like

If you had to choose a song that is the soundtrack to your life, what would it be? I am trying to figure my song, lol

like

Anyone aware of any FinTech companies in Miami that are hiring?

like

Where do you get your business clothes?

Anyone else’s firm not uttered a peep about returning to the office? Majority of my attorney friends were told to return to the office full-time or for X number of days per week minimum. Mine hasn’t mentioned it once and while I’m obviously not complaining, just curious if anyone’s firm’s been the same.

like

I’m a senior in advisory at a B4 firm. I’m aiming for partner, but secretly would like to be part of firm leadership. Is there anything I should do differently on my way up the ladder?

funnylikeuplifting

Additional Posts (overall)

Looking for a good spot for a quick weekend getaway that won't break the bank. Open to traveling anywhere in NY, NA, PA, CT, MA,RI. Any suggestions?

like

You can always tell when teammates are talking shit about what someone in the audit room just said when you hear the alt+tab keyboard sound followed by the typing of novel. 🤣

like

The partner and I worked on an listing spreadsheet for an hour and the program crashed afterwards. I tried recovering the file, but no luck. How should I patch things up with the partner?

like

What accounting related jobs can get me outside more?

Living life in a cube, or right now my bedroom, makes me feel like I'm missing out.

like
like

Who is going to TEAC in May? Let's have a meet and greet 😂

like

Does PwC allow you to keep your work phone or do you send it back once you leave the firm?

like

For people who've been in Big 4 a long time, how often do you get a firmwide reply-all situation? This is the 2nd time I've seen this in like 2.5 years

likefunny

When you mess up your own taxes and call yourself a CPA #noIcantDoYourTaxes #AuditorProblems

like

Poll for the group - How common are PIPs at the various Big 4? Is it like the whole bottom 10% of everyone’s group or a once-in-a-while-this-person-is-dumb kind of thing? Have heard of quite a few within my group and wondering if it’s normal or something isn’t quite right.

like

In most markets, does B4 pay more/less than national or regional firms?

like

Hello! Is anyone here part of the Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion (DEI) Institute at Deloitte and willing to chat? My friend is interested and looking to connect. Thanks :)

like

Any tips on how to pass the CIA? Study materials? How long to prepare for each section? How was your experience? Thanks in advance!

likehelpful

Is this strictly tax audit now or is this also where all the advisory consultants are?

like

Enjoyed that week off. Can I have another?

likefunnyupliftinghelpful
like

What is the average salary for 3rd year senior in Audit in Dallas?

like

I assume that when I scroll through these that everyone is someone in NYC since the office is so big. Where is everyone from? Comment your office location.

like

When you turn down an offer do you give the recruiter a call or do you email them?

like

Score release is two hours. May the CPA gods watch over us..

likefunny

New to Fishbowl?

Download the Fishbowl app to
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
Download Fishbowl to see what others are saying
That was just a preview…
Sign Up to see all discussions
  • Discover what it’s like to work at companies from real professionals
  • Get candid advice from people in your field in a safe space
  • Chat and network with other professionals in your field
Sign up in seconds to unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.

Already a user?
Login here

Share

Embed this post

Copy and paste embed code on your site

Preview

Download the Fishbowl app

Sign up for free to view this conversation on Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use and Privacy Policy.

Already have an account? Log in

New to Fishbowl?

image with Fishbowl logo and arms reaching out for a handshake

Already have an account? Log in

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use and Privacy Policy.
Messaging rates may apply

For account settings, visit Fishbowl on Desktop Browser or

General

Legal