Before moving in with my boyfriend I had mentioned that I had couple of months left on my lease and that I couldn’t break it. He said “of course I wouldn’t expect you to pay for rent while you still have your lease going in”. 2 days ago we had a conversation about expenses and it turns out he wants me to pay for rent. I brought our previous convo but he doesn’t remember. We had a big fight because of it and now we aren’t talking (con’t)

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Lol looks like you found an ex bf

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This is a not a mature way to solve a conflict.

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Talk to your BF
The rent thing is a complicated situation for both of you, you should work together to figure out and not expect the other to handle it

Two days without talking is a lot honestly, I personally try to resolve any conflicts with my partner by the next morning. You just don’t want to be carrying that feeling for more than a day

Thank you.. this is by far the most mature advice I’ve gotten.

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Type faster 😂

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Done.. you guys are quick.

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During the discussion he brought up a recent convo we had where I mentioned that my company could decrease my salary given the new city has a lower cost of living. He said that he would cover more things if that’s the case. While yes, this is true for anything recent, this is not true for the upcoming months where I’m still paying for rent in city A. He called me immoral for it (and later apologized for the incorrect use of words) and decided to pay for the rent until I can get out of my lease. I feel bad for him because the new job at city A won’t pay him until February. His previous contract ended in November so he’s getting no income.. but also, this is something we had discussed before. I wouldn’t have made the move right now if I had known I was going to pay 2 rents.

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This is why meeting minutes are so important

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Are you sure y’all should be moving in together? Sounds like a tough start to a major life event

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Yes, it was the next step in our relationship and I don’t regret moving here. I just want to fix this problem..

OP I’d recommend you not taking much of what people are saying here too seriously. Your partner is not perfect and neither are you, this doesn’t seem like it’s a reoccurring behavior so as i said on a previous post, talk to him

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It went pretty well. We discussed what happened and apologized for any rude thing we said during the initial convo. I will help cover some costs (like utilities) but he will assume the rent until I can get out of my lease.

I stormed out after the end of the convo because my feelings where hurt. He came like 10 min after and hugged me but to be honest I just wanted to be left alone. He took it in the wrong end and now we are not talking. It’s been 2 days and it’s pretty awkward. Also, I know nobody at this new city.. I feel isolated and sad.

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Will he really difficult to be with him if he’s so calculating already.

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Sounds like a roommate not a boyfriend. You didn’t have anything in writing. Also, it’s not too late to go back.

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I understand :( gotta be something else making him flip flop, maybe stress, but he also is putting you in a bad situation when you are most vulnerable. You are still young & able to move anywhere regardless if you take a loss now. Just want you to be sure you know that.

Sounds like maybe the added stress of being sick, going to the ER, etc etc has added some nuance to this that you left out of the original details. Our current climate with COVID, mental health, plus other peoples health issues on top of that can do funky things to a person and also their memory.

Maybe all of this played a role in his memory and or how he acted, stress can do weird things to you.

I would go into a future conversation with the notion that this probably has a lot to do with it, and not some tactical attempt he made to screw you out of a few months of rent, and then try to come to a solution together.

And before anyone says it: you both need deep personal therapy separately and then couples therapy together to make this relationship salvageable 😂

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VP1 that’s what I thought lol.. anyways, yeah I agree.. covid, being sick, etc etc has definitely added extra stress to both of us.

Airbnb the old spot. Even if not legal in your building. By the time they catch you it’ll be time to go anyways.

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Problem is.. the old spot is empty now. Fortunately, I found someone that can take over my lease but I won’t hear back from my landlord until Jan 6 since she’s in vacations

He’s acting childish - you can’t talk finances with children.

How much stuff do you have? Can you move back for the rest of your lease and revisit moving in together once it’s up?

Thank you. I’ve reached out to him asking to clear the air. Waiting for him to reply 🙏🏾

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