{ "media_type": "text", "post_content": "Bf and I are commuter LDR, so only see each other on weekends. He never stays more than a day because he’s an introvert and “needs his me-time”. He went over to WFH from his friend’s cabin on Tuesday, and is planning on staying the weekend rather than visiting me. I want him to have his fun, but I’m irritated.", "post_id": "5f08e6bd64444100220e0fd6", "reply_count": 13, "vote_count": 1, "bowl_id": "59e88be7e2808e00149b0443", "bowl_name": "Women In Consulting" }

Bf and I are commuter LDR, so only see each other on weekends. He never stays more than a day because he’s an introvert and “needs his me-time”. He went over to WFH from his friend’s cabin on Tuesday, and is planning on staying the weekend rather than visiting me. I want him to have his fun, but I’m irritated.

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If he’s so much of an introvert that he can only spend one day with you, what does that say about the long term implications of your relationship? Do you want to be married? If so, what does that look like with him?

likefunny

I’m sorry to hear this! But you’re not his top priority which says a lot. My SO is the most introverted person ever and we spend weeks together.

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Is he there with other people or you? How long have you been dating?

Just a bunch of male coworkers. And saw each other on and off for 4 years, but got together 1.5 years ago.

How often do you communicate on weekdays?

You can communicate with him that you would like to spend more time with him. He might not know how his actions hurt you so you communicate with him what your needs are and be true to yourself so ask exactly what you need to feel better in y’all relationship. If he can’t meet you half way, then move on. It’s not going to get better if he isn’t willing to put in the work to make you feel more secure

My therapist gave me a super book called getting the love you deserve... basically just talks about communicating your needs to your partner in best ways possible and being a better partner to your SO! Highly recommend it. Maybe read it or listen to it on audible while the boyfriend is gone :)

As an extreme introvert, if he can only spend one day with you, he just doesn’t like you. He’s comfortable so he keeps that day around. You deserve more than that but you’ll stay because you’ve invested 4 years and are too lazy/scared to find someone else. Or you can change the narrative and be by yourself that one day he gives you and find someone who actually likes you 7 days a week. You hold the key to your future

To the last part - Introverts have select friends they are close to & being with them is like being “home” for them. He doesn’t feel at home with you. You deserve someone who will meet you in Nebraska & as soon as they see you at the airport will realize they are at home.

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