BF gave me a ring that he said would be replaced with an engagement ring when we get married at a later date. I don't get the point of it. Should I ask him to just consider it an engagement ring?

Posting as :
works at
You are currently posting as works at
Highlighted IconHIGHLIGHTED

Sounds like a high school promise ring...I agree you need a real discussion about what that means.

like

Second this.

like

Probably not financially ready to get married and wanted to lock you up somehow, but didn’t bother to spend time considering a more useful and romantic way to go about it

likefunny
Recent IconRecent

Engaged to be engaged...that’s for kids.

likefunny

Why don’t you talk to him about it and your relationship rather than a bunch of strangers on the Internet?

likefunnysmart

I think the most important thing is to talk to your bf about what the ring means and his thought process

like

If he didn’t ask you to marry him, you’re not engaged. It’s pretty simple.

likefunny

I agree. That’s weird and super confusing. He has different definitions of being engaged wtf. It’s almost a round about way of proposing..?

like

I think y’all are missing the point of OPs question. Your stories of your significant other enduring a period of wearing a less expensive/ flashy ring doesn’t apply to this cause you stated your plan of wanting to get married.


What OP is saying here, is that her significant other did not propose nor did he have an explicit conversation about being engaged which in my opinion is baffling. Op, I would be confused too and my suggestion is to have another conversation with him. Ask him if this is a promise ring vs an engagement that may be upgraded after he becomes financially capable to purchase a better one. I think the most important part of the conversation should include both of you having a better understanding of what an engagement should look like as well. Finally, don’t nobody got the time to be fake engaged.

likehelpful

I get your point, but he might not have enough money to buy an engagement ring yet and wanted to show his commitment to you. My bf got me a ring for Xmas and said something similar, and I thought it was sweet! We talk about getting engaged but not now bc we aren’t financially able to yet. So maybe just get his perspective on why he got a intermediate engagement ring. I’m sure he was just trying to be romantic.

like

I just don't understand why we don't have a long engagement

I honestly don't get the question - mainly because if he isn't giving you an engagement ring, why is he giving you a ring so you can tell others you are "engaged" - that sounds a little odd. If he didn't get down on one knee to asked you to marry him, that's not an engagement. It's a promise ring that he will ask to marry you... at a later date. But what is the point of that? Are you making signs or giving hints that you do want to be engaged?

Otherwise, I find it silly that you need to tell others that you are engaged. Sounds a little controlling if you asked me. IMO.

like

I think EY3 means that he sounds controlling. Like he wants others to know you are taken and unavailable but maybe he’s not quite ready to completely commit. Or maybe he’s Prince Charming like the guy that posted about giving his future wife a plain engagement ring until he could afford the ring he wanted the love of his life to have. Which, by the way, beautiful story and he’s a keeper!

We both know we want to get married. Now we are engaged to be engaged. I'm thinking of asking him why don't we just have a long engagement if he's not ready to get married now, or should I leave it alone

like

Isn’t that what Prince William gave to Catherine Middleton, and made her wait 8 years to ask her to get married? No one’s got that kind of time!

like

What PwC3 said!! If I’m dating a prince, and not just any prince, one of the most well known princes in the world, he could give me a rubber band that cuts off circulation in my finger and I would still take it and wait.

like

Being blunt, his explanation sounds like he wants an out if needed. If not financially ready, waiting for the right ring, etc. then say it. It’s dating, engagement, marriage. Not dating, some random made up period, engagement, marriage. What’s next? Once married, you can say you’ll have kids, but are trying yet because you don’t have the house with the white picket fence and minivan?

like

Next to the wedding, engagement rings are the biggest waste of money. Use thinking as your engagement ring, use the money for rhe engagement ring as either part of downpayment for house or invest and in 10-15 years you'll be glad you did

like

People still give promise rings?

like

Was there a whole proposal involved?

No

Related Posts

Hello does anyone know any MSL or consulting roles I have one year experience in industry and experience in the neurology and vaccine therapeutics area.

like

What is SC and MC comp at Navigant?

like

So I just recently accepted an offer, I’m slated to start 03/21. I signed up for DLaunch in person and just want to know if it’ll be in my local office or if I have to fly out? Which locations are offering DLaunch?
Side note: my background check is still in process, will that delay my start date?

like

What’s the media scene like in London? Are there jobs available at senior positions or is it a small/tight market generally?

like

I’m moving to Sydney from the US and looking for a decent area to live. Any recommendations for a single male, 25?

like

Received an offer from Oracle in tech/app sales consulting. Anyone know about growth opportunities from this role? I’m interested in strategy and RM

Is there any compensation for being recognised as a top performer in Townhalls and as the Invictus awards?

What experience/salary/title level should I aim for if I want to look for a new job?

Current: Big4, Senior 4, $140k, 10 yoe (demoted from M to Sr when switching from tech consulting to big4 a couple of yrs ago), want to stay in HCOL city

like

Anyone here work for RBCs Climate team, or any of the Big 5 banks climate work? Would be interested to chat about the work you’re doing, currently at a T2 firm with an MBA but looking to mix it up.

like

Hey guys, cleared all the rounds at Nagarro. Have been offered Senior Engineer role.

Current CTC- 8
Offered- 15
Current role: Analyst
Yoe- 3 years relevant in one of Big4

What's the salary range for this position? Any info highly appreciated!

like

Hello all! I hope your first quarters are off to a great start! I have a boutique firm in LA. We provide business and IP services, including business formations and trademark filings. We also handle real estate, family law and personal injury matters. Please feel free to message me with any referrals!

like

Anyone here Work in subrogation? I wanted to see if I’m being paid a good rate. Been in my role for a little under 2 year and making around 55k. Curious to see what other companies salary range for the same position.

like

First year lit associate. I keep having terribly slow weeks. I’m not on track to meet my hours. I’ve asked for work and taken on transactional assignments, but it’s still not enough. Is this the norm or am I getting fired?

like

Can anyone provide referral for a Guidehouse UK role?

like
like

Any 👩 🐠 up for a chat?

like

Do any of you have the title “paralegal” but no paralegal certification? I do a lot of actual paralegal work but not sure if it would be looked down upon to use that as my title on LinkedIn/email signature.

(My company doesn’t really assign titles btw - my boss calls me his paralegal)

like

I am a business analyst trying hard to transition to product management. Would doing CSPO be an advantage/necessary? I have done MBA from new IIM+FRM+L3 CFA pending. Also can someone give me feedback on the CV(can dm)? YOE: 5.5, post MBA : 4.5. Which companies would be easier to transition?

like

Hi Fishes . I have joined In the month on June and been a top performer/Rolemodel . How hike should I expect ?

Additional Posts in Unprofessional Topics 🙃

Any tips for making friends as an adult? My team at work doesnt really hang out and I've started to feel lonely and noticed I dont have many people to talk to.

like

Which finger is your nose picking finger?

likefunny

Anyone care to share how much their daily screen time is on their phone? I feel like I am constantly glued to my phone and want to gauge how I compare to others 🙃 I average around 5-6 hours

like

Have you found yourself making more environmentally conscious buying lately? For example, i’ve switched from cleaning my kitchen counter with paper towels, to wash and re-use wipes....

like

Am I shit person for not feeling empathetic to drug addicts? They wreck havoc on so many lives other than their own, are a menace to society, and are a drain on resources. If they have a mental illness and won’t take medication and put effort into their own well-being, why should we?

likesmart
likefunny

Recently bought a house in Austin, TX. I’m thinking about renting out some bedrooms to help cover mortgage. What would be a good place to find roommates/tenants?

like

Wdyt about workplace dating? Tell us your story!

likesmart

I find myself really yearning of my childhood and remembering the “good ole days”. It really makes me nostalgic and quite depressed for my life. I have a good job, life, relationship, but somehow I just struggle being happy and just wish life was how it was when I was younger. Does anyone get this feeling at all?

like

Go Real Betis! And thank you Sevilla for holding Barca to 1-1.

like

26 year old consultant at KPMG has this in her bio. Complete BS? Right ?

Post Photo
funnylike

Where’s a good place in Harrisburg to get your hair colored

funny

Do you think it was appropriate or on the other hand foul play for representative Tlaib to call out Meadows for bringing a so called “prop” to the Cohen hearing?

like

Light hearted topic coming at ya... what are the strangest use of cuss words you use/have heard? I’ll start... I was just in a store where a woman dropped a glass jar that broke and spilled and she screamed “oh you motherless fuck” ... I just, wow it’s my new go to.

funnylike

So...who saw that thrashing of Real Mashit-without-Ronaldo an hour ago by Ajax? As a Barca fan, it was a very satisfying week 😂😂

like

Haven’t seen bf in over 3 months due to COVID. Lately, he’s been pushing to see me but I don’t feel comfortable because he hasn’t been quarantining. He makes it sound like if I’m not willing to go see him might as well breakup. Any advice?

like

Has anyone tried to forward their mail from NYC to another location during all of this? How long did it take?

like

Thoughts on Bloomberg running for president ?

like

Very random but I’m looking for deodorant recommendations? I feel like it never works for me and I’m constantly reapplying it. I have tried so many different brands (including mens). Thanks in advance!

likeupliftinghelpful

I matched with a guy online that I developed feelings for (which I can say has never happened with anyone else I matched with tbh). We text a little everyday but he hasn't messaged me back and cont'd

like

New to Fishbowl?

Download the Fishbowl app to
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
That was just a preview…
Sign Up to see all discussions
  • Discover what it’s like to work at companies from real professionals
  • Get candid advice from people in your field in a safe space
  • Chat and network with other professionals in your field
Sign up in seconds to unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.

Already a user?
Login here

Share

Embed this post

Copy and paste embed code on your site

Preview

Download the
Fishbowl app

See what’s happening in your industry
from the palm of your hand.

A phone with Fishbowl app

Send download link to your phone

OR

Scan your QR code to download
Fishbowl app on your mobile

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use and Privacy Policy.

Messaging rates may apply

Download app

Sign up for free to view this conversation on Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use and Privacy Policy