{ "media_type": "text", "post_content": "Consulting career is ruining my marriage and relationships with kids. I'm obsessed with promotion and don't feel close to my family anymore. I need help", "post_id": "59617a980d55e10016813323", "reply_count": 34, "vote_count": 15, "bowl_id": "552d1d24dc1c586b09d2d051", "bowl_name": "Consulting" }

Consulting career is ruining my marriage and relationships with kids. I'm obsessed with promotion and don't feel close to my family anymore. I need help

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Sorry about that OP, but my advice to you is to take time to spend with the family. At the end of the day, a job is just that, a job. They are a means to an end but family should always come before work. Also, just because you're taking care of yours, doesn't mean that you are not taking care of business, there is always a way to maintain balance between work and family. Best of luck to you and don't give up on your family.

There are many many good jobs out there. Do NOT fall into any of the classic traps -- not wanting to "fail", thinking that this is the "fast track", desiring the "prestige". In my long experience (I've seen literally hundreds of close colleagues leave consulting), when you feel this way it is not a "phase". Here's perspective: EVERYONE leaves consulting, the only question is whether you leave with the first 50 percent (years 1 through 5), the next 40 percent (years 6 through 10) or the last 10 percent. Almost no one "retires" from consulting. Look around you and count the 65 year olds. Do you see any?

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Sounds like a "you" problem, to be blunt. Get a piece of paper and write down your actual priorities. Next to each write why it's a priority. Next to each write why again (2nd order motivation). I think you'll see what's important to you. And it's probably not the next promotion. Careers are long. It's a marathon, not a sprint. Don't burn and fuck up your life for a $20k raise.

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Welcome to my world, where I have become this selfish monster, for which my existence is only defined by my personal achievements ☹️

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D3 - HR 👹 alert!

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I thought Deloitte is the best firm in the world where everyone gets 3 month vacations and 'owns their own career'

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Quit. Not worth it.

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Sorry to hear OP. But take a vacation and think through everything

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Pwc1 I agree with you completely. People don't talk about their jobs at their death bed. They talk about life experiences missed with families and friends. Also having attended several funerals, not one mention of what that persons job grade at work was.

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What is an engagement manager?

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hard to believe coming from a Deloitte professional. We have a great work life balance culture. Take PTO and spend some time with family!

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@A1, a consultant in the matrimony field. Helps couples prepare for marriage.

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The key is an open marriage OP, I read that on FB earlier

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Honestly, you don't get paid nearly enough to ruin your relationships and be miserable. If you had a shot at working for yourself or making some serious money (350k+) then it would be worth really trying to get your family on board. That's likely why you family isn't more understanding... you're likely not around and for what... 150k? You're scrapping for a 15% raise in a career that takes more from you then it gives back to you. You're crazy to even consider jeopardizing your family relationships for consulting. You're life just isn't going to change whether you make 150k or 200k. Don't change your life (impair relationships) for something that isn't going to change your life (moderate at best promotion at Deloitte).

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Good catch EY3, lol!!!

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Agree as a D employee, D3 is spewing the line and drinking the Kool aide. Sure they give us ample days for pto but we're not enabled to take them. There's no work-life balance. You're viewed as weak or lazy if you ever are sick or need to take care of personal/life/family matters. Toxic culture. We're even burning out our interns.

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Agree with D6, in fact if we take PTO it counts against our utilization. It's all a charade

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Literally laughed when I read D3's comment. As of a post on FB a few days ago, even the interns know we don't have a culture of work life balance.

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poppycock ATK1. Plenty of people retire from our firms. We also have people in their 50s and 60s as well.

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My dataset doesn't include the big 4, maybe people retire from there? All I know are people who call themselves retired at 50-60, but they're not, it was just the end of the consulting line.

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D5 is clearly a real employee, not one of the usual D bots

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