{ "media_type": "text", "post_content": "Did anyone's brains just stop working while pregnant? I'm 13 weeks and can only manage to work half days. I'll sit at my computer for 12 hours and bill only 3-4 hours instead of my standard 8-10. I have work to do, but zero motivation or availability to focus unless there's a looming deadline. Does this phase pass? Did this happen to anyone else?", "post_id": "61441d2558c3580021306233", "reply_count": 48, "vote_count": 20, "bowl_id": "5a0c9a1f61b01a001937c406", "bowl_name": "Working Moms" }

Did anyone's brains just stop working while pregnant? I'm 13 weeks and can only manage to work half days. I'll sit at my computer for 12 hours and bill only 3-4 hours instead of my standard 8-10. I have work to do, but zero motivation or availability to focus unless there's a looming deadline. Does this phase pass? Did this happen to anyone else?

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In this phase right now!!! I honestly considered going part time because of it. My assistant has three kids and she noticed I was kind of losing it, so she has been super on top of me — that has helped with getting stuff done. That being said, I still have 0 personal/internal motivation because nothing “feels” as important as it used to. I’m wondering if that is permanent.

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Yeah nothing ever feels quite as important as it used to when you have this tiny human(s) depending on you for everything. They quite literally depend on you for their very life. It kind of dawns on you when you are feeding them at oh-ungodly a.m. and you realize that yeah, that (work) is not really as important. Don’t get me wrong, I still am a responsible and dependable worker but is it as important as having food on the table for the kids? No. Ct can wait for me to log back in after the kids are in bed. I have a 6 year old and twin 2-year olds.

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Yes, and it gets worse. My son was born in November. I distinctly remember in February one year and some months after his birth, I woke up and felt like I was back. It was such a strong feeling, and it completely made it obvious to me that something had changed. My thoughts were exactly: welcome back. Like I said that to myself. For pretty much two years, since I got pregnant until that February, I felt like I was living on someone else's body and/or brain. So I think this is possibly to very encouraging, but this was my experience. And it did eventually get better, although not as fast as I would've hoped.

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Just wait until you have a newborn then toddler. It only gets worse. You just learn to get things done.

likefunny

same! 10 month old and 2.5 year old. on track to bill 2600 hours but I have lots of help from nanny and my parents and daycare. there's no other way.

Oh I totally experienced this during my first trimester! My work was garbage and I cannot think. I was devastated because I thought maybe the entire pregnancy will be like this. It went away in the 2nd trimester but now the 3rd trimester is starting to get hard again.

likefunny

It gets better in the second trimester, and comes back near the end. I have one day left before starting leave and I have been struggling mightily to focus. This is my third (and final) and it was this way each time for me. Good luck!

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Charge all those hours!! They’ve already been included in the budget so you’re just hurting yourself

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I'm not going to charge the client for work I didn't do. I use a timer and am very good about starting/stopping when I'm working or not and recently I just cant bring myself to work

likefunny

Yup! You’ll get a boost of motivation and energy during your second trimester but that lack of motivation and what I call pregnancy ADD will come back towards the end of your third trimester.

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Yup. I worked until lunch and then would go tuck myself into bed 😂 It gets better in the 2nd trimester and then comes back in the 3rd trimester. During the 3rd trimester I told my husband to wake me up when it was time to push 😅

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I was there. My utilization is low in my first and second trimester. It’s very hard to focus given the morning sickness and hormone changes. I guess it’s okay to take it slow unless your team is demanding and you’re a senior and above.

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I took it slow (but still hit all deadlines and did good work) but the partners definitely noticed and there is now an avalanche of work coming my way. I plan to announce next week after my NTS so hopefully things will go well 🙃

helpfuluplifting

I remember that one feels sleepy all the time, even before noon! It’s like you start at 9 and you are ready to doze off at 10.30 or 11.

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I am there right now with you at 16 weeks. I just do what I can.

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Basically your life change the day you get pregnancy... never gonna be the same. I had terrible 1st trimester ( throwing up, back pain, etc) but i would trade anything to go back. At least you go home and you can rest and sleep in peace. I have 2 kids so I have been there. No worry. This will go away, you will pick up your motivation back soon.

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Pregnancy and postpartum is HARD. Makes sense since the body is doing so much work. Definitely felt stupider and was frustrated for feeling stupid

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I was good with focus, but started making lists for the first time in my life. Would go to the grocery store to pick up 3 things, come out with 7 and maybe 1 was what I needed. The first time I did that, I went back in the store and bought a pregnancy test. Also, I would fall asleep in front of my computer around 7p every night. Went away after 1st Trimester.

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Right with you at 22 weeks but it did get better after week 13. The first tri is SO rough. Be kind to yourself. You’re a factory now. Work doesn’t matter as much.

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Been there. It passes once you get to the second trimester. But for me it returned when I got back from maternity leave and lasted a solid 5 months.

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Yes terribly dumb during pregnancy and still struggling at 1 yr post with memory. I write EVERYTHING down

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I'm in week 14 and feel so exhausted all the time. I get headaches and am incredibly demotivated by the physical toll of pregnancy. My brain doesn't feel the same, and my mood swings are lousy. People say it gets better in the 2nd trimester, but I'm still waiting for the light at the end of the tunnel... And to add on top of that, folks are saying the baby's development is impacted by a mother's mood or emotional state during the pregnancy?! I already feel like such a mess and am so disappointed in myself for not getting my act together. 😔

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My brain definitely started working differently during pregnancy. But having said that... Don't go to hard on yourself. When I got pregnant, I was not expecting to have kids. At all, ever. I was so sad and depressed and flustered, particularly the first months. Plus I was SO TIRED. Plus since I was not intending to get pregnant, for the first weeks until I realized I was I drank tons and smoked. Anyway, after realizing I was pregnant and deciding to keep the baby, I was an emotional mess. I felt so guilty that the kid was not yet born and I was already messing up big. With everything. Physically and emotionally I was convinced I was harming him. Couple of things. First, being tired did get better later on in the pregnancy. I was super energetic all the way until birth, from somewhere in the second trimester. I felt better the day before giving birth than I did during the first trimester (I had an easy pregnancy, I was just so tired at first). And second, looking back I wish I had been softer on myself and allowed me to enjoy more of the pregnancy, or at least experience it with less guilt. So if you are tired, and feeling blue, tag it in your memory bank as 'so this is how being pregnant was for me' without also tacking guilt about hurting the baby in any way. Experience this very unique process as fully as possible, with its ups and downs, and trust that you will be doing the best you can for the baby with what you have. By the way, after all that suffering, I have an amazing kid. He is 14 now, with an unbelievable emotional intelligence and one of the smartest people I have met. He did well, despite all that guilt trip I had. So wish I had spared myself (and him) at least that part. Which is also what my doctor said, lol

uplifting

First trimester, I had low motivation, but it was still okay. Second trimester was much better, but as soon as third trimester started, I was so exhausted and my brain was just so much slower. I'm 39 weeks now and I really hope my brain starts working again at some point.

I love WFH for this very reason. Naps. In bed. I have said to colleagues “sorry I missed your call I fell asleep” no shame.

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Yes! I felt like I had and on/off switch and at like 5:30 pm every day the switch was off and there was nothing I could do about it. It went away around week 20.

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