Didn’t grow up in a religious environment.. just strict upbringing… Made many mistakes as a person in his 20s.. ended up with HPV.. I’m spiritual, not very religious.. i always get hit on or opportunities for a fling, but wanting meaningful relationship… seen success everywhere but I’ve been trying to realign myself with spirituality for myself… it just seems when it comes to companionship.. I’ll never see a whole family because of the mistakes of my past..

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Don’t despair or lose hope, Allah is merciful and loves those who repent. Sometimes it takes a test to reconnect with our fitra, may Allah facilitate your affairs and bless you with a companion!

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Came here to say this - think about the mistakes and truly understand why they were wrong (wrongs against yourself, others) and ask for forgiveness. Pray tahajjud with sincerity. And don’t despair, that’s what gets you to move away from the deen.

likeuplifting

What do you mean by “I’ll never see a whole family because of the mistakes of my past”?

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I think as humans we always forget our value and worthiness is in the eyes of Allah SWT and not tied to our past mistakes or society. Allah is big and merciful, as humans we make mistakes, we learn and become better versions of ourselves. For your own personal development, stop letting your past hold you back. You have to move on from it and find forgiveness or whatever it is between you and Allah SWT. It’s a personal journey that’s not easy, but so worth it at the end because you’ll be in a better state mentally and emotionally. Don’t create boundaries for yourself, God is soo big and forgiving! May Allah give you all the happiness in this world and after!

likeuplifting

You’re not alone. I’m sure of it.

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You’ll find a good, loving spouse one day inshallah

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Everyone makes mistakes. Don’t condemn yourself just because humans taught us to be this harsh. Allah is always more forgiving so please don’t allow people (I am pretty sure they made the same mistakes if not more and just hides it better) to make you dwell on things you can’t change.

Good luck OP! Everything will be okay Inshallah.

Always remember this, you do not need their approval or forgiveness, you only need Allah to do that.

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