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Depends on context and the inflection in your voice…
Exactly...it's all in the tone.
Pretty much. Context does change the variation of this (ie. "Poor thing just doesn't know any better," or "He tried, but he's just not good at that," etc. But basically all means the same thing.
No darling, not always. Depends on the context 😉 You may also hear "Bless" or "Bless it."
Rising Star
It's my favorite Southern-ism, because I've been led to believe that's EXACTLY what it means! Although, as one Southerner put it to me, it's more like "go eff yourself."
Why would you write oh dear on a student’s paper?
Needs work on subtraction, check your spelling, etc
How does anyone interpret oh dear?
Behavior specific language
I agree. “Oh dear” is value laden. It’s important to use neutral language.
No all the time. Sometimes it is a true expression of compassion. The younger generations have made it a degradation.
Pro
I say it when someone tells me what a rough time they have been having lately, I can tell they feel better when they hear it!
Bless your heart is either sympathetic or you are not really with it. Whereas bless his pea-pickin’ heart is completely ‘he’s an idiot’
Rising Star
Stealing that. Even though I'll get some very funny looks up here in CT!
Bless your heart was my grandmas catch phrase and it never felt as though she was saying you’re a simpleton. She was from Minnesota.
Whenever she said bless your heart I felt so loved by her.
Thanks, y’all. Got the idea!
Southern woman here. It all depends upon context. But generally the speaker does consider the target of the comment to be lacking in some way.
The oh dear comment has led me to wonder if the bless your heart is also used?
Please tell me that’s not a thing.
Southern girl here. It's definitely all about the tone of voice and context. Example- a young student trips and skins his/her knee at recess. As you place the bandage on you may say, "bless your heart, are you ok? Does that feel better?"
An adult makes a snarky remark to or about someone and you respond, " well, bless your heart," or worse "have a blessed day" and then walk away.
Ah ha ! That’s insightful.
I say oh dear on papers that have many things wrong on them and a parent let me have it.
It's condescending.