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Yeah like when there are a few people in a room in a meeting and no one makes eye contact with you during the discussion.
I am an introvert, so I don't want to be noticed most of the time and humans drain me in general. So what I have done over the years is to have more 1:1 conversations with people after the meetings. I provide my thoughts/comments/feedback directly to people. And over time, as they find my insights valuable, and fuss at me for not speaking up (ha), they have helped me get speaking time during meetings and discussions without my having to overexert myself.
Now there's a gamble with this approach that someone could take credit for your ideas, but maybe even that will give you the push/energy to speak up more.
It feels good to have someone out there feeling the same way you do! I always feel intimidated to speak up, and I definitely won’t speak if my presence is not acknowledged(like them not having eye contact etc) it’s really a bad behavior though. Maybe we are emotional people? Lol
It has just happened so often that I am talked over that after a couple of years, I’m tired. I get feedback that I need to put my perspective forward but the reality is I don’t feel like I have the space to in a lot of team and client conversations because I get talked over or interrupted
M1 I’ll try this approach it seems better that the state of apathy I’m starting to feel about ‘speaking up’ responses I get
Thanks for your thoughts. It’s great to hear that others relate !
Definitely been there. I think I've compensated by always trying to be versed in something many others are not. Lots of late night researching and being 2 steps ahead. It's harder to be ignored when you can confidently add value. Maybe I'm naive, but while I still find it hard to get a seat at the table, once I can get just one word in that adds value (read: helps someone at the table financially), there is usually a seat being held for me the next time. And if you literally can't get a l word in, try it in writing. After a meeting I might follow-up on something discussed right away and provide background or a recommendation in an email to whoever I feel has pull or even send to everyone if I'm very confident.