{ "media_type": "text", "post_content": "Does anyone care about moms in advertising? Serious question. Should it be okay for moms to pull a month of insane hours and weekends?Was going to post in the mom bowl but want to hear from everyone.", "post_id": "5cd5a6bb8c0d0e00212fdb18", "reply_count": 255, "vote_count": 67, "bowl_id": "5565cfca8b2b9a03009acf57", "bowl_name": "Advertising" }

Does anyone care about moms in advertising? Serious question. Should it be okay for moms to pull a month of insane hours and weekends?Was going to post in the mom bowl but want to hear from everyone.

likesmart
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I recently left advertising after 20 years in the business as a producer to raise my two kids and to try a new career in a completely different field. Once I had my children I will admit that I struggled balancing being able to be a good producer with being a present mother let alone partner to my husband. I felt stretched too thin and I chose to leave advertising because I didn’t feel any agency would ever be able to support my needs as a working parent. I felt that overall agencies are not set up to have the support needed for their employees that are parents to help them continue to succeed in their career. And I didn’t blame the agencies per se. Unfortunately I don’t think it’s the advertising agencies that don’t care about mothers but rather the way agencies set themselves up to meet the demands of their clients. Agencies are dependent on meeting their clients demands to get paid and that means adhering to their clients deadlines. In the years as a staff producer or freelance, whether at a very well established big agency or a small, nimble agency it wasn’t any different. The clients dictated the timeline and we had to follow and most of the time that meant working insane hours to meet the clients demands. If agencies provided additional support to their employees that have children with perhaps onsite day care or a policy that supports working parents or approved time off after pulling long long hours without your job being jeopardized, I think we wouldn’t even be having this discussion.

likeuplifting

As someone who went client side with 2 littles, it’s a vast improvement

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America is one beat away from automating the hell out of most mid level and white color jobs, and every time minimum wage goes up, we get closer to wiping out those low paying jobs completely, with the exception of the ones no American could stomach doing. Advertising campaigns are dead. And I hear from more clients than not that they are done with campaigns, that these don't have any effect on sales anymore than to just saying to people "hey, we're (still) in business". Every year budget negotiations are a race to the bottom. We have face that the jobs we have now will be as rare as double rainbows in less than 10 years. Realistically America is headed for extraordinarily hard times, and China and India are the new markets most brands we serve are trying to break into. Americans simply don't matter, and they aren't going to bother spending money on them. The jobs that are left are going to require, by design, that you are completely agile, mobile, in the air, and ready to change your roll, or learn a new language even, at a moments notice. You will start to see it in the job the descriptions. This is the new American reality and it isn't going to change. If you want / have kids, great. Enjoy them now, because this is as good as it gets. Enjoy vacations, holidays, PTO etc, while you have a job. Because in a few years your going to say to your self holy crap why isn't anyone calling me back... It's been a year, or three, and i'll take anything. any. thing. at all.

likesmart

How depressing! Although probably pretty accurate 😩

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I don’t. Not more than anyone else. As a single person without kids, I find it incredibly annoying that people with families are treated as if their time is more valuable than mine. It’s not. Nobody should have to pull a month of insane hours and weekends. Not moms, not dad, not juniors, not seniors, not anybody. But as long as we do have to do those things, you do too.

likesmartfunny

Why moms specifically? If your work place doesn’t have a great work/life balance it’s on the company. No one should be over worked.

likeupliftingfunny

I know it doesn’t fit into the CBS sitcom paradigm but as it turns out some dads parent also. Especially if the have chosen to marry equally motivated and ambitious women. Wild thought. I know

likesmart

I’m a mom of a little one and while I’ve been fortunate in some ways, it’s always a challenge, I’ve taken hits financially and otherwise, have lost time with her and fought for it. Parenthood is like the mafia: you can read about it and see movies, but you don’t know what it’s really like until your in it. And while i appreciate the “what about dads” talk, it’s harder for a working mom than dad. Period. But in the end, people are making hard choices every day, in our industry and beyond. Women are judged harshly for our choices and expected to adapt and feel lucky for any chance we get. Will the industry change? Likely no. Will society? Here’s hoping. Will it be different for my daughter? I’m doing all I can to make it so.

likeupliftingfunny

Husband leaves early for kids, his bosses swoon (all female, but his male bosses never cared.) I leave early to get the kids, and it’s “okay but you’ll get this done for tomorrow right?"

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Having children is a choice. Just like working a job that will require you to work “insane hours and weekends” is also a choice. Life’s about choices. While finding a balance between life and work can be a challenge, plenty of people do it.

likefunny

While I don't think caring for the elderly is a great reason to bring children into the world (social services need to be reformed, full stop), jcw1 made a really important point. Women in our society are given the majority of household and childcare responsibilities—there's plenty of data on this. Even in self-identified equal partnerships, studies show women do significantly more household and childcare labor—i.e. it's accepted and ingrained in our society to the point where it's invisible. To say "life's about choices" is an oversimplification that ignores cultural context. People face different choices, and the same options are not afforded to all. @AC2 Please respect that not everyone wants children, regardless of age and/or job title. It's not naive, it's a legitimate choice.

smart

Correct. I am single and childless, and I respect working parents who can balance both. But I absolutely do not think that parents should be absolved of nights/weekends over those without kids

like

No one is arguing we shouldn’t. This post specifically called out moms.

In my work experience, moms care about other moms. I’m grateful for the bad ass, hard working mamas and papas I know. Everyone should care about everyone and their lives no matter what their family status. It just works better that way. Everyone has things outside of work that need care—pets, parents, friends, mental health, you name it. We should all care about all of it. As a single mom with a son who’s grown now, I’ll always be grateful for the people who’ve had my back. And I’ve reciprocated countless times You don’t survive in this business without working your ass off. We all put in our time one way or another.

likeuplifting

I’ve worked at small agencies where I’m the only mom it’s BRUTAL. I’ve also worked for amazing moms or dads who get it and know family is first. I work for a woman now who is a mom she could care less (child older). So not all parents are empathetic to school requirements.

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It’s not okay for anyone to work the kind of hours that are regularly expected in agency life, frankly.

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Lol. What is going on in this thread. Seeing a lot of people defending the industry and not their coworkers. Work gets crazy, don’t take it out on each other. If a mom or dad needs to take off to be with their family, good. I will happily work at a place that puts that in front of #content. I’m not a parent, nor will be anytime soon. in the meantime, stop acting hard bc you put in a few more hours. grow up ya dorks.

likefunny

Should we have to pay for the childcare when we are stuck in a world of countless nights and weekends (coz that shit is getting expensive AF.)

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I make sure it’s, project based. I mostly work for previous bosses. I spent 15 years in advertising. I have enough contacts to keep me busy now.

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I would like to amend this post to “parents.” Dads face this too.

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I deleted my snarky comment once I saw this. Thank you but maybe you should edit the original.

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Every time a thread like this is posted (and thank you so much OP for doing so) we get the privilege of seeing some absolutely garbage takes. Moms are unfairly marginalized because the system in place supports the traditional nuclear family structure, and there are policies and institutions that exist to protect it. The system simply does not give the allowances to moms that it does to dads, whether that’s in the office, at school, or at home. That’s all there is too it. No one is attacking men, they’re calling out a grossly outdated, misogynistic system that is holding us all back.

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Amen 🙌🏼

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I’m so tired of this “it’s a choice” narrative. It’s part of life, having kids. And each one of you came from a mother so stop acting like because you don’t have / don’t want / maybe someday will have kids, you’re not actively a part of this “choice.” It’s not a choice like going to yoga is a choice, it’s a part of life. In the same way that being there for your friends or supporting your parents is not some “choice.” That word devalues the conversation.

likeuplifting

But the point is that “the choice” doesn’t only apply to having children. Of course it’s not the same as going to dinner, I don’t think anyone here implies that. But this notion of well, having children is natural, therefore I should be able to do that, but also have the career that I want, the money I want, the hours I want, the free time I want...it’s little much, no? I think certain life choices inevitably bring sacrifices, and it’s ok because that is part of life. That being said, these days, workplaces are as flexible as ever and I literally have not seen one parent whose responsibilities were not taken into consideration. You just have to ask.

Most of the parents I have worked with put in additional time once their kids have gone to bed, often very late. But the inability of the industry to create sanity for all sucks. When the parents leave for the day the same group of childless people are often stuck in the office night after night.

likeuplifting

But why can’t the work get done during work hours. Are we in too many meetings? Or is account agreeing to timelines that aren’t doable? People need more time to enjoy life outside of work, now with the excessive drive for award show work (usually not billable) this has become unrealistic for everyone. The agency model needs to change. Everyone goes home and work until 12am parents and the single coworkers. Can we all start pushing back finally?

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I'm trying to understand this question...what's the point? At the end of the day all I care about is doing my job. I'm a new mom and it's tough as hell. NO ONE CARES ABOUT ANYONE...this is not real life this is our job. So no, no one cares and that's all right because the people that really matter and care are in our real lives which happen on the weekends and at night.

likehelpful

CD3 1,000%

All of the naysaying men in this thread should bring up this conversation at Mother's Day tomorrow and see how your moms feel about it.

likesmart

People don’t care about anyone in advertising. That’s our biggest issue. An industry of leaders who don’t care

likesmart

The answer to “what can we do when work makes it impossible to have an outside life” isn’t “having a life outside of work is a choice" If there are constant late night and weekend work the job isn’t staffed properly. If the agency won’t address it start looking elsewhere

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People just want everything to work in their favor without putting in the work of getting a new job or getting to a more comfortable position

Hope everyone with the oversimplified "it's a choice" comments are actively working to advance abortion access and reproductive rights.

likeupliftinghelpful

I am!

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I am a working mom and agency lifer. I have worked in big and small agencies - male run and female run. When I had my first child my (male run) employer didn’t even have a maternity leave policy. Where I am now (female run) has generous parental policies (by US standards) as well as accommodations to help new parents transition back to work. In both of these environments, I have always been clear and unapologetic about my boundaries and needs. I find that the biggest offender with crossing boundaries is ME! When I commit to upholding and communicating what is manageable, the balance is achievable. When I start checking email at all hours and let myself get sucked into responding on weekends and other personal time - the work will always be there. I agree that there are historical and systemic challenges- but I also think we need to start by examining whether we as working moms are being clear and resolute in communicating our boundaries. Not blaming or shaming - just sharing what I have found to help in my own experience.

likeupliftingsmart

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