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Does anyone ever feel guilty about how much money they make? Any time Im around friends or family and money comes up, I always try and dip out of the conversation due to me making substantially more.

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Guilt is massively unproductive, and comforting yourself by polling others about their guilt doubly so. Do something about it:

-make a long-term commitment to volunteer with folks who have less than you in a capacity where you can add value and help to reduce the wealth gap (e.g. low-income neighborhood schools)

-donate X% of your income to a cause you’ve thoroughly diligenced to make sure your $ will flow through to a meaningful outcome and impact. Apply the same rigor in this as you would for your corporate client and you’re already better than 80% of philanthropists.

-attend anti-bias trainings, get involved in community politics, put yourself, your body, your mind on the line if you feel guilty about your privilege and want to do something about it

Don’t make excuses about savings goals (I can’t give X% because...) or lack of time to volunteer, etc, if you’re also gonna talk about guilt here.

And maybe you already do a lot of this stuff, OP, but it sets a bad precedent to just call it out without any concrete action behind it for the loads of others who are in a similar situation here and not seeking doing anything but talk


I feel more confused than anything. I gross $120k and live in a big city while most of my friends in my home town make $50-80k. Yet, they have much nicer vehicles, twice as large and nicer homes, better clothes, and the real kicker, CHILDREN.
I have explored ALL possible contributing factors (like a good consultant 😑) and my only theory is everyone lives off credit, while I religiously pay off my full balance every 2 weeks.


Bruh don’t get me started on how my poor friends live better lives then me. Every few months they go on a vacation while I’m here like “I hope my alt travel gets approved”. I asked one couple and they were like we both have at any given time 5-10k in credit card debit. I for one would have a ducking panic attack if I was 5-10k in CC debit. They were so carefree about it.

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Don’t feel guilty but be generous. Use your position and resources to people help themselves and gain more opportunities.


I do this all the time, even when it potentially negatively impacts me.

OP, I'm sure that we have already discussed this.
We will be cutting your bonus and keeping salary flat for the next two years and reassess the social gap then.


It’s pretty gross how much we make compared to people that directly make the world better. But, instead of feeling guilty about it, you can flip that mindset around.... Making bank can be a powerful part of your strategy for helping people, saving lives.


Along with https://www.givewell.org to really maximize your impact


I haven’t switched jobs because I’m pretty decent at this and it enables me to donate significantly to things I would not be any good at doing directly.


How much more? I feel like many ppl make above $100k now a days and I doubt you are in the $200ks as a manager but could be wrong


Thanks guys, even hearing there's other folks in the same boat helps..

Feel guilty about things you do, not what other people don’t.


yeah. came from the middle of nowhere and always feel guilty when I go back for that same reason. I've had much better opportunities and by simply not living there I have massively increased my earning potential


Yeah I came from a mostly farming area that isn't doing too well these days.


Why should you feel guilty? Human Psychology is interesting. You should read up Nietzsche on the genealogy of good and evil


You didn’t understand my answer.


I have a similar background... in my mind, reversion to the mean will remind us where we came from, to put it nicely. We’re lucky to have come so far, and it’d be precious to assume this is some permanent status. No point in feeling guilty about something that can be so fleeting. Enjoy the ride while it lasts


The phrase is ‘regression to the mean’, and is unrelated to the point you’re trying to make.


I’ll never feel guilty for having worked my ass off to achieve the success I have today....that said, I don’t flaunt my money or success to friends and family because life is more than that so it’s just never a concern for us.


No, I because I live in NYC. A salary of 200k feels equivalent to 50-75k in other cities when it comes to trying to buy a property.


No it’s not 2.75x to live in nyc. $200k in nyc is up there and pretty good

I was just looking at housing prices in the la area - for me to live in an equivalent place as I live in in Chicago I would have to buy a place at $8mm. (Obviously can’t afford this) - I don’t think I make that much when I see people who can handle that

Not that much of a difference. The reality is the world is governed by money that is far beyond the measly paychecks we make. Money where families routinely give their kids $500k for a down payment on a home. Don’t feel ashamed of what you make.


I didn't say I wasnt enjoying my money.. Sorry it came off that way.

I don’t think it came off that way at all. I came from a family of 7 living on $35k/year growing up. Have many uncles, cousins, etc struggling to pay the bills.

I very intentionally avoid any conversations around money. When it pops up I focus on the other person and don’t talk about myself except to say I’ve been fortunate if pressed.

You’re not the only one who feels that way.

I have $7k left in student loans (over $35k paid down in last 2 years). I panic about THAT 5.2% interest debt. But also, I ‘sit’ on my money that could be put into the market because sometimes the only thing that gets me through the work day is my “f’ this, I quit” savings cushion. 😬

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