I need advice. My girlfriend lives a few states away in school. She’s got 3 years left. I just started a new job that’s full time remote. I live in a place I absolutely love and could live in for the rest of my life. Now, I’m a bit stuck. On the one hand, I want to live with my partner. On the other hand, they are stuck there and I don’t want to live there (higher taxes, worse climate, fewer things to do). And somehow, I feel like I’m the bad guy for not wanting to move. I don’t know what to do.
Rising Star
I did.
Just set expectations up front. The way I thought of it was just another source of introduction and that's what I told my parents.
The expectation was that after introduction, the potential partner and I will speak, share information. If things go better, than look to meet and so on. I was clear if they made the process awkward it applied pressure I will not do it anymore.
So no daily check ins (weekly was fine), no telling me how great a family they are, and especially no "it would make us look bad if you said no".
I told them to communicate the same to the potential partner's family.
My parents were awesome about it.
Same
It can actually worked our for me. Got engaged very recently. Biggest learning for me was to give it time. Like don’t taste to hurry to get to the yes/ no/ milestone. Just give it time, talk and text about general things like sitcoms and food and weather. Overtime if it feels like you aren’t forcing a conversation and it’s natural it turns out well. There were 2 others I had spoken to it well a lot more work to talk to them vs my fiancé where it felt like we never run out of random, very random things to talk about.