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Please worry about yourself and talk to people/someone. Worry about yourself more than your job.
Rooting for you!
Please please please go see a doctor. I’m a relatively new partner and dealt with anxiety/depression for way to long. As others said before, I’m night and day after getting some help and getting body chemistry right.
Thank you all so much for the recommendations. I’m currently trying to find a therapist (mine moved across the country to reunite with his son) so it’s been a struggle in that regard. I won’t give up though. I’m just hoping I can help myself before I get fired or put on a PIP, but I’m trying my absolute hardest that it won’t ever come to that. Thank you all again for being so helpful and kind.
Block out your cal and do something spontaneous. Even a short trip somewhere to get the mind to unwind and focus on something new and exciting. Change your routine and see if your firm has a professional you could speak with
Depending on what firm you're at their medical might cover therapy. I see a shrink twice a month for $35 a pop after insurance
I went to a psychiatrist, got put on some meds. It’s literally night and day, I feel so much better
Rooting for you!
Like everyone said, talk to people. As a senior I would hope my staff would feel comfortable talking to me about how they’re feeling so I can help them manage their work and free up time to take care of themselves (see a therapist, get some exercise, or just relieve some stress) and not be scared about getting out on a PIP. Especially in light of recent events I don’t think you would be in danger of a PIP if people knew you were struggling with depression - that’s if you’re comfortable telling others
Take some time off- it really helps. And also use the work benefit of therapy/counseling sessions. I’ve been in your shoes. I recommend a min of 2 weeks off to help recharge the soul in addition to speaking to a therapist. There is more to life than work!
Use EYAssist if you work for EY. Get the help you need - we’re with you fellow Fishbowler!
I want to try and fix the problem before it becomes an actual problem, but it’s hard because I’m not very good at reaching out. I love my job and want to be here. But I’m afraid to talk to someone here because I don’t want to get fired over it. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.
Talk to people - you’ll be so much better if you realize that you’re not the only one who has this feeling
Go see your doctor. No shame in taking meds to balance you out. It made all the difference doe me.
I recommend that you also research some non-med options that may help with the situation too - such as changes in diet (cutting out carbs and sugar) and exercise (aerobics or HIIT). Both have made a notable difference for me - even though I cannot say I have clinical depression, I did have depressive tendencies that were largely alleviated through these lifestyle changes. Meds are probably faster acting so if your situation is serious enough, they may be necessary. In the long run though, I believe there are more real benefits you can get from the natural remedies. Good luck!
I've fought depression since I was 13. I've always been on meds. Mental health is no different than physical health. You can't just keep pushing through if you are sick. A cold turns into bronchitis and then into pneumonia. You have to treat that illness just as you do mental illness. Learn to recognize when you're not 100% early on so you have time to get better with minimal effect on your life.
Lesson: Don't push through until you end up with pneumonia.
I’d recommend seeing your PCP for meds at least until you can work through whatever is going on with a new shrink. I’ve been on Lexapro for 4 years now for anxiety, and my ONLY regret is not taking it sooner. Best of luck!
Until you reach a point where a psych can help you, do what you need to on a day to day basis. Respond to your body’s needs. Communicate with your team. You don’t need to tell them every last detail, but communicate to them what you need. Worse come to worst, take a leave of absence if it’s not working out until you solve it.
As everyone has said, get help. But talk to someone in your chain of command if you feel comfortable doing so. They need to know what's going on so they can support you. Being proactive will prevent the PIP. I know how hard it is to reach out when you are suffering from depression. You really dont feel like anyone cares about you. Those feelings are chemical reactions that seem real, but they are not your friends. It takes courage to ask for help but you have to. Depression will tell you that you are alone and have to suffer alone. Depression is a liar. People care. If one of my staff were to share this with me I would do anything I could to help them. Sometimes all it takes is a simple step to move toward healing. Praying you have the courage to make that step.
I just went through a terrible family emergency and got help through the KPMG wellness hotline, now I’m seeing a professional in person but also can talk to someone 24/7 very helpful
Definitely talk to someone. Counselor, therapist, whatever. I mean, if you go to the dentist twice a year, why not go talk to someone more often? Your brain is worth more than your teeth, right? Give yourself some self care. You deserve it.