Does anyone in this bowl struggle w/ mental illness? If so, how do you manage your day to day w/ work and family life? Was diagnosed w/ ADHD + clinical depression a year or so ago, and have been looking for a bit of guidance...

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I def wouldn’t tell your team. It can backfire so badly.

However you can try to really work with your therapist in your triggers and minimize them. That’s really the best way.

Lastly if your environment is your trigger, it might be best to leave it. No job is worth your health.

likehelpfulsmart

Def would never advise Black people tell anyone about their mental health at work. They don’t care about us so that’s begging for an L. I have a therapist, journal, meditate and exercise.

likesmarthelpful

CONTEXT: I am taking medication and doing therapy regularly, but I still do struggle w/ work sometimes. I’m afraid to tell anyone on my team as I worry my condition will be weaponized and used against me when it’s convenient for them...

likehelpful

Agreed with above. I have anxiety and ADHD, take meds for both, would *never* tell my team. Regular therapy has definitely been helping me. Found a Black woman around my age on TherapyForBlackGirls.com and she's awesome.

For managing things at work, I try to set boundaries with myself (no checking emails before 7:30, no checking emails late, turn off notifications for teams & email at night), and with my team ("I can get this back to you by <<a time that is doable for ME!>>") so I'm less stressed & they're not hounding me for slide updates constantly 😩.

For managing things with family, I've learned it's better to be blunt than to get the guilt trip for not calling my mother every day lol. So I'll often tell her (and other family who expect calls) when I'll call. I'm able to text "today & tomorrow are I really hectic for me, but I'll call you Wednesday" or whatever. You're allowed to set boundaries with work and family for your own health and sanity!

likeupliftinghelpful

Thank you so much for your response. This is very helpful. Do you have any tips on staying attentive during meetings? That’s one of my biggest challenges — sometimes I’ll fidget on my phone, doodle, etc. I do try to record some of my more important meetings and re-listen to them later to recollect what was discussed but that’s about it.

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I actually disagree with not telling. I have bipolar disorder and sometimes my episodes are so bad that I can’t work. Without this knowledge my supervisors would just view me as lazy/incompetent/uncooperative etc.

Not telling you to scream it to the mountaintops but if it’s affecting your performance, telling someone may help you keep your job.

likehelpful

Thank you for sharing your story. I greatly appreciate the alternate perspective. I have had to take mental health days (probably once per qtr), but by and large it hasn’t affected my capacity to work too too bad. A lot of it is centered around lack of focus, attn to detail w/ deliverables, etc.

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Also sending you a hug 🤗 ❤️🙏🏾

upliftinglike

I would agree, not disclosing is best unless it is absolutely necessary. By necessary, I'm referring to situations were you can't complete your job without special accommodations. If you need special accommodations, I would reach out to HR first before disclosing anything to your team. Firms are required by law to provide you accommodations and it protects you from any potential negative responses from people within the firm.

As someone who was diagnosed later in life (college/grad school) it know how difficult it can be coping. The one good thing is now you understand why you may have trouble focusing, you've always got a lot of ideas bouncing in you head, etc. I would spend as much time as possible picking up some books on ADHD, the causes of ADHD, and things people do to manage.

Personally I've found a few things helpful.

First, I practice working memory games at least one a day. There are a lot of studies that show a high correlation between ADHD and low working memory. Low working memory affects a lot of things, reading writing, problem solving, etc.

Second, I read a lot and takes a lot of notes. People with ADHD usually have trouble writing, so if you fall into this bucket, I would pick up the book "How to Read a Book" by Mortimer J. Adler and Charles Van Doren. I know it's a little on the nose, but it's a very good book. For note taking, I jot down everything; ideas I have, notes in meetings, thoughts I have when I'm doing a project. It helps me organize my thoughts, make sure I don't forget things when my mind drifts off, etc.

Third, I don't work in open floor plan spaces or in big team rooms. If it's mandatory, I always ask if I can take a desk just outside the team room. These environments are too distracting: people talking, running meetings, getting up for coffee. These environments are distracting for anyone but for someone with ADHD they can be really challenging. Even if the room is not busy, you getting up to jot down notes on a whiteboard, or generally walking and thinking (I do this all the time) might cause others to question your work habits when the reality is you just work differently.

Over time you'll find things that work for you as well. Hope this helps!

likehelpful

I have family members who have ADHD, anxiety and depression. I like all of the suggestions posted so far, and agree not to tell you team. It's none of their business. Do get a trusted support system. What has worked best for my peeps are: meds and counseling. I highly recommend SMR Counseling Services. It's Black owned and most, if not all, of the therapists are Black. They also take insurance. With the ADHD, also limit distractions so that you can focus (e.g., quiet space, soft light and noise head canceling head phones/ear buds), eat well (avoid alcohol, sugar and caffeine), exercise, budget more time for tasks and don't be afraid to take breaks. Take a walk, clear your head and then get back at it. Lastly, CBT helps with settling down to go to sleep, something that people with these challenges often have a hard time doing. Good luck.

likehelpful

Agree with the sentiments above. Is there one person who can advocate/ confide in at work?

I’ve struggled with anxiety and worked with a really great coach on a CBT therapy approach, it may help you? I can share my experience/ their info if you’d like.

helpful

The coach I use doesn’t take insurance but honestly it’s so worth it! I found that our sessions really allowed me to put the tools/ resources into practice. I also realized how my thoughts truly impacted my actions.

Also my current therapist is CBT based I can share her details if you’d like. I’m not sure if she is accepting new clients but it’s worth a shot. She’s also a black woman ❤️

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