Engaged/married women, how much does your spouse financially support you? We’ve been in a pretty equitable split based on income.

like
Posting as :
works at
You are currently posting as works at

I make three times as much as my boyfriend and I don’t mind that I pay for majority of our lifestyle. He contributes is so many other ways, doing the dishes, cooking, grocery shopping, planning dinner dates/outings. Spending time with my family frequently.

like

When we were dating my now husband paid for almost all dates/food, filled up his car with gas if I needed to use it, bought me flowers and snacks often. He still does all that but now the money is all combined. He still buys me expensive gifts(my iPhone, iPad, lots of jewelry, equipment). Now that I think about it, he started giving me cash for the electrolysis appointments I’ve been going to.
I like to be “spoilt” and he likes to make me happy so it works for us. He’s traditional in that he feels like his role is to be a provider for our family, and I LOVE that!
So while it’s all combined he still indulges me.

like

But being totally honest, I’m sometimes jealous of the women who’s husbands support them more, even when both partners work. I’m jealous when I hear of other women’s partners buying them flights, expensive jewelry, apple products, etc.

I’ve mentioned to my partner that there are times I wish we were a bit more traditional like this, and he wasn’t too keen on it. He will sometimes cover my meals and sometimes pay <$300 extra to cover for me on trips, but it feels like something he does out of obligation, not because he wants to.

like

A1 for the win! Men will never want everything women want. The faster women accept this, the less frustrated they will be lol

like

Worth distinguishing between financial support and gifts. I sensed those were intertwined in your post a bit.

Since you’re at par in terms of income, it’s only fair that you shoulder common expenses together. That doesn’t preclude your SO from buying you presents or taking you out for dinner as nice gestures. Also, you should reciprocate even if in lower frequency. Even traditional men appreciate the initiative.

like

For married couple, I strongly recommend joint account. This is what it means to have a true partnership.

like

Well I guess technically he has a couple bank accounts in his name and I have a couple in my name lol. But all our credit cards are shared, and we have each other's logins for all the bank accounts.

My husband let me spend money in whatever way I want. I don’t have any income now since I go to school. We have a joint account.

like

Are you prepared to be responsible for 90% of the housework/ cooking? Give up your career and be a SAHM when it’s time for kids? Always take his lead as head of the household and never talk back?

I know those questions sound ridiculous, but it’s also ridiculous to expect to have only the parts of “traditional” relationships that benefit you like receiving gifts.

like

I do feel that married couple should not split finance all the way. That doesn’t feels like marriage, more like roommates

like

I make 3X my wife and pay 80% of hh expenses. She does 80% of household work

like

I make double my fiancé and we agreed upon a total amount we want to contribute to our joint account each month and then contribute equal percentages of our income and put the rest in our own individual savings/retirement accounts. We plan to continue this once we’re married, but increase our monthly contribution as our expenses increase (house, kids, etc).

like

Same.

I’m also Bay Area and happy to see some medical peeps join the bowl.

like

F

I make double my husband. We make it equitable by contributing equal percentages of our income to our joint account.

I make $200k, he makes $50k, so I mostly support us financially but he supports in other ways (chores, cooking, emotional support etc etc). But honestly we share all our bank account and credit card info with each other and see it all as "ours" (we use the same Mint account to track everything).

For all big purchases we just talk to each other and decide, even if the purchase is only for one of us. I've never seen "my money" as separate from "his money" and vice versa (he used to make more than me, then we flipped).

Related Posts

What is it that worries you the most as a newly grad?

like

What qualifications should I have to eventually become an art director? I don't have a portfolio so I should maybe start there. Other than that, any ideas?

like

What would be a fair salary for an NYC based consultant with 3 years experience at a big 5 tech strategy consulting firm?

like

Hello Folks , Recently got laid off. Any leads for Project Manager roles or any project management roles will be appreciated. I have overall 7 years experience in IT project management. Thank you 🙏🏼

like

Hey everyone. I’m interested in applying to Venture for America (VFA) this year as a fellow. Is anyone in this bowl a current fellow, team member, or alumni from VFA willing to refer me, please? I can send over my resume and anything else. Thanks.

like

I’m considering switching to relief work for the freedom instead of being full-time at the clinic. What are the drawbacks of relief work?

like

Anyone familiar with Pixacore?

like
likesmarthelpful

How is FSO Advisory Data Team in New York for EY?

like

Are there any digital nomads around here who work as community managers? Do you find it’s a good career choice for someone who wants to work and travel?

like

What’s the Deloitte equivalent to a PwC Manager? D Manager = PwC Manager?

like

What do MBB partners exit to typically at FAANG? What comp changes do they see? Can they score a manager role in tech if they have a strong tech background (STEM PhD etc.)?

Off note: What happens to a partners stake when they leave an MBB? Do they get paid out or something?

#bcg #bain #mckinsey

like
like

If interested DM me

Post Photo

Anyone from EY Fed on Airforce Audit? Have questions about the IT side.

like

Any strategist with sustainability experience I could chat with?

163j question: why does the instructions say to add investment income from K1 if you’re a corporation as an “other addition” to ATI when the regs say to subtract it? Am I missing something?

like

Please tell me that I am not the only in-house counsel in Tech with a supervisor that shares the same race as one other team member in the same sub-group (also reporting to same supervisor), who feels that they get just slightly a little less recognition in workplace, but harder/higher standards imposed indirectly on? I mean, I work longer hours, work harder, am more responsive to emails/matters when out of office, and have broader range of legal in-house and law firm experiences.

like

Additional Posts in Relationships

How much to spend on engagement ring?

like

Why is that instead of having accountability for things that aren’t fair, women resort to calling men incels

like

Looking for good Valentine’s Day/weekend date ideas and suggestions in/around Atlanta! I’m not from the area, not super big on bars/drinking. Any good restaurants to aim for (at least one nice vday dinner, and other can’t miss places)? Any fun/unique activities to do other than world of coke/aquarium? Thanks in advance

like

Broke up with my Ex (after ~4 years of being together) almost 2 years ago, and we never spoke since then. I met someone right after and we are getting married this summer. Should I inform my Ex about this out of courtesy or is it unnecessary as it might hurt them? (no clue how they are doing or what they are up to nowadays)

funny

For the older 🐠 out there. Have any of you successfully re-dated an ex and end up getting married? Haven't talked to an ex in 2 years and really hit it off.

I dumped my gf of 1 yr bcz I started to feel less attracted to her. Plus all my fam ws also telling me that we look good as a couple.If I didn’t dump her, next step would hv been marriage. cntd.

like

I recently ended a 5 year relationship to someone I thought I was going to marry and everyday I worry I made the wrong decision. At the end of the day though our values weren’t in alignment - he became very conservative over the years (or more open about his perspectives on it).. such that he thought being gay is something not to be discussed/ encouraged, abortion should be illegal etc. And just felt an inconsistency with his level of compassion/empathy that was confusing bc it felt hot and cold

like

New gf said she’s addicted to me. What does it mean?

like

can you be friends with an ex? We dated less than 3 mos, have some mutual friends but live in different cities.
We love each other but needed to break up. He had a recent family trauma & other stressors (law school mostly) that initiated the breakup. He couldnt afford to be emotionally present within us and the things at home (which i dont blame him for and fully respect)
I want to support him but also balance my own desires and expectations. Ive accepted we’re broken up fr. ended over 1mo ago

like

Anyone have experience "moving for love"? I'm talking moving from a large city to a midsize city, somewhere you never thought you'd move to, but makes sense to move there because that's where her family is and we want to start a family soon after getting married. Any advice? Been in an LDR for 2 years, met online.

like

If your partner did something selfish and then you let her know what she did was wrong. Then she apologizes saying "I'm sorry if you think I was selfish". Is that a sincere apology?

like

My boyfriend and I have been doing long distance for the past 2 years and it’s really strained our relationship. We’re both feeling really disconnected but would like to work on reconnecting. Any tips?

like

Does your relationship have someone more dominant/submissive? Or do you see yourselves as equals? What does your dynamic entail?

like

Is it a red flag to question if every decision is a red flag?

likefunny

How does everyone else deal with work crushes?

like

Doing a little reflecting and I realized I've always fumbled opportunities with potential dates. Either I didn't make a move when I should have, or I waited too long and the moment passed. Any advice to prevent this?

like

If someone said (over text) “happy thanksgiving to and for you” what would you think they meant? To be clear the intent was “Happy Thanksgiving to you” as a greeting and “happy Thanksgiving for you” as in, I am giving thanks for you.

like

It’s been 6 years but still feel lots of jealousy about my ex and his wife. I’m married as well now, and I don’t have feelings for him, but can’t help but want the worst for them or for my life to be better. Anyone else feel like this? What did you do to get over it?

like

My spouse and I met at a rave 7 years ago. At the time we were dabbling in various recreational drugs (acid, mushrooms, weed, k, molly, alcohol etc), but over the years we've slowly cut back drug use.

I've always been v connected to the rave scene, and before I ever tried drugs I would attend events sober. These days, w my career and where I'm at in life, I'm back to going sober.

2months ago, he decided to white knuckle sobriety (except alcohol 🙄) and has become v judgemental of ravers contd

like

Have a 3 year relationship with GF, she doesn’t seem very happy in the relationship anymore. I personally my am very happy, but she doesn’t feel loved anymore and not attracted to me anymore. We bought a house with together last year, what considerations are there if we do end ups splitting? She paid probably a little more (20% more in down) but the deal is I paid all the mortgage and taxes and bills, it is probably about even now.

like

New to Fishbowl?

Download the Fishbowl app to
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
That was just a preview…
Sign Up to see all discussions
  • Discover what it’s like to work at companies from real professionals
  • Get candid advice from people in your field in a safe space
  • Chat and network with other professionals in your field
Sign up in seconds to unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.

Already a user?
Login here

Share

Embed this post

Copy and paste embed code on your site

Preview

Download the
Fishbowl app

See what’s happening in your industry
from the palm of your hand.

A phone with Fishbowl app

Send download link to your phone

OR

Scan your QR code to download
Fishbowl app on your mobile

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use and Privacy Policy.

Messaging rates may apply

Download app

Sign up for free to view this conversation on Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use and Privacy Policy

Already have an account? Log in

Sign up for free to continue using Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use(New) and Privacy Policy(New)
Messaging rates may apply

Already have an account? Log in

For account settings, visit Fishbowl on Desktop Browser or

General

Legal