Fam - need some uplifting. Has anyone done something that was so publicly embarrassing at work with leadership and the entire practice that they felt it was a career ruiner? How did you recover?

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I’ve done some very stupid things at work, said some very stupid things, and I’ve always lived on. You wear it, it’s awkward for a day or two, and you learn from it. People move on, and you will too. These are the experiences that grit is made from, and I’m sorry you have to go through it, but you’ll be better for it

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Here is the thing: nearly everything is recoverable in the long-term. Here is the other: everyone loves a come back story.


Focus on that, and focus on doing all of the little things right. Work your ass off. Keep your head down. A year from now, everyone will be talking about what an amazing recovery you have made from a terrible incident.

Let me tell you a story: 16 years ago, I was working in a boutique consulting firm. We moved into brand new offices on the top two floors of 1777 Pennsylvania Ave, a half block from the White House. Got to rub elbows with people like Don Rumsfeld.

Our office was tricked out. Doubled as an art gallery with a professional curator, a full catering kitchen, a private balcony, and a rooftop deck.

Owner of our firm decided to have a 4th of July party to celebrate the new digs. Buddy of mine brought in an electric grill. We decided we would grill burgers in the kitchen, using the catering hood with high-powered fan to suck away the smoke.

We had been grilling for some time l, enjoying some libations, when a colleague ran into the room, screaming at us about a fire in the office. We peeked outside the kitchen and down the hall. Dark, greasy smoke hung in a long, low cloud all the way down the hall to where people were congregating.

It smelled like burgers.

Turns out the contractors had not vented the kitchen hood outside. They got lazy and vented it into the hallway.

Thick, greasy burger smoke coated the walls and many 10s of thousands of dollars of original, expensive art in slime.

The owner of our firm sprinted into the kitchen, purple with rage, and began yelling unintelligibly at us.

I ran. I ran down the stairs, out of the building, into Lafayette Park, and stayed there for hours.

I got fired not long after.

But 16 years later, I work for one of the largest, most respected firms in the world. I make a six figure salary. So does my attractive, successful wife. She is an executive at a Fortune 100 firm. I have two awesome kids. We have a great home and better friends, in one of the world's great cities.

So take heart. It gets better.

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Just declare it ‘fake news’ and pay hush money to those involved. And then do something even more embarrassing the next day to cover it up. Works well for some people.

likefunny

I know someone who got drunk at the holiday party and started kissing her boss in front of everyone. Essentially letting everyone in the company know that they had been carrying on an affair. And he was married. She didn’t have the guts to go back to work, couldn’t show her face. And felt her career was over in the industry. She finally showed up to work, got the come to Jesus talk, she apologized, and life went on. Once the immediacy of it all wears down, it’ll be a figment of your imagination. You’re gonna be fine. It’s all a part of life.

likeuplifting

Remember last year when those partners from pwc messed up the best picture announcement at the Oscars?

likefunny

What happened? Can’t be worse than that guy who threw up at the client.

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Agree with the above - if you haven’t collected embarrassing moments in consulting, you probably either haven’t taken enough risks or you lack self awareness...

I say - well done!!

likehelpful

I don’t live in the US, but you don’t have to tell me what happened, no worries. You’ll be okay. I know someone whose car ended in the middle of a lake after a night of too many drinks and he’s a partner now. Also, it’s Friday. Go do something that relaxes you :).

likehelpful

I think most people are too self absorbed to care for long about these things. Your moment will pass, I'm certain. Remember that there are more aspects to you than your work identity. Hang in there.

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There are a few things you can’t come back from: abuse, theft, slurs, and being Dutch. The rest is negotiable.

likefunny

Talk to your mentor to make an action plan on how you can recover from it. Don’t sweat it. “Worst” case scenario you switch jobs, so what 🤷🏻‍♀️. Don’t jump, OP! It’ll get better. Also, if you want to vent: burneremailforfishbowl@gmail.com

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Take the weekend, you might come back to find that this isn’t as big of a deal as it feels tonight. Hopefully you have at least one person you can speak openly about this to, do so when you back to it on Monday and assess from there. If this is truly so bad that it requires a change, then change, learn from this, and move forward with this in your rear view. My assumption is your too young to dwell on this for too long.

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^^ that's because we're all alcoholics P3...its firm culture

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Damn D2 ftw. Seems like that disaster was going to happen eventually. Shouldn’t the blame have gone to the contractors here?

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I'm sorry OP - is there someone within your firm who you trust that you can talk to? Maybe it's not as bad as you think - we are always more self critical. Do you have a good mentor / counselor you can confide to?

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Can’t be as bad as that one 🐠 who barfed all over a conference room the morning after a holiday party. He/she didn’t get fired. You’ll be ok, OP!

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Thanks fam - thanks for the uplifting words. They are helping me in my moment of deep despair.

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Also I know a Senior who drunk sang in front of PPEDs and other peeps (others were sober) and still got promoted- you'll be fine!

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I’ve had a few too many to remember. OP it’ll get better with every instance :-) I’ve survived and even thrives, you’ll stop giving a F after this one or maybe even the one after. Enjoy, drink and get back to work on Monday. Cheers!

helpfullike

Are you the person that accidentally sent an embarrassing picture to their client?

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