Females in consulting that had kids while at the firm - how did you do it and how did it impact your career? Those that travel - did you have the option to reduce travel during/after pregnancy?

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My wife did. She chose to leave consulting and raise our kids full time. That was almost 20 years ago and she has been happy and fulfilled the whole time. She picked up a different career a couple years ago after not working for more than 15 years as the kids got older and she says she is happier doing this new thing than consulting. Our kids are great and stable and we are both happy with how it worked out. Just one story. There are many.

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D1 ...nice to hear your viewpoint. I am going to follow the suite soon...kids r definitely more important...just need to take the courage of giving up one income...

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I just agonized a lead for not being able to travel. I came back from maternity and was put in this travel based project. Irony is the lead has 3 kids herself!! I will face the music very soon. Honesty, very few are understanding about situation of mom's w kids and very less family help. This week I have to check out kids potential new school and also go to parent teacher conference in her old school. I am struggling to keep the balance. Looks like I will take a break and focus on kids.

D1...looks like this will be my path too but too many financial obligations are hurting

D1, I understand the financial side. Adjust your life to match. Trust me, your kids don't care how much money you have if you give them a happy home. Truly poor kids can be done if the happiest. They will be fine

And honestly, who cares about work. I see what my wife did as the price day to day getting our kids to adults as both the harder job and the far more important one. No BS. Having one parent stay home is good in my opinion. My wife started party time work, mostly subbing, when the kids were all in school. And then started a new career when they were older and that doesn't involve travel

It has worked out well.

Sounds like the answer is to give up work for a number of years. Was hoping for a different answer but figured it was the likely one.

Op, I hope it works out for you. I know you will be happy because the kids matter more than anything. You can honestly still keep working as the ages allow, but just in something with a lot less travel. One other thing in my story is we moved closer to my parents so that my wife had more help and the ability to take breaks. I love my wife for the choices she made. I respect her as a mother more than any woman I know.

And you deserve every respect also for whatever choice you make.

D1 , thanks for the perspective. You sound like a great, understanding husband

I had a kid when I was an SM. I made Partner 3 years later. I took an internal role for the first year which was a lot less travel - maybe 20%, and was actually a great opportunity as it allowed me to develop some great relationships and learn a lot about the firm internally. After that I tried to to look for opportunities to do day trips or shorter trips as much as possible and said no far more often than I used to and just in general tried to be more selective about my projects and focus on those with big payouts. Obviously, I had an amazing team supporting me and wonderful leadership who really tried very hard to make this feasible. My kid is very used to my traveling lifestyle now and I focus on quality time with her vs quantity. It works for us.

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