{ "media_type": "text", "post_content": "First world problem but could use some advice / perspective. \n\nI’m getting ready to have my first (yay!) and my close friend is insisting that I take her uppa baby stroller / bassinet / etc because she paid so much $$ for it and her kids have grown out of strollers.\n\nI am so grateful for the thought but I suspect it’s not in great shape. (If it were I would totally insist on paying her for it and this wouldn’t be an issue.) \n\n….continued", "post_id": "61cb22d6e1b4fa003217de10", "reply_count": 38, "vote_count": 1, "bowl_id": "58f81646ae9f610010f869be", "bowl_name": "Consulting Moms", "feed_type": "bowl" }

First world problem but could use some advice / perspective.

I’m getting ready to have my first (yay!) and my close friend is insisting that I take her uppa baby stroller / bassinet / etc because she paid so much $$ for it and her kids have grown out of strollers.

I am so grateful for the thought but I suspect it’s not in great shape. (If it were I would totally insist on paying her for it and this wouldn’t be an issue.)

….continued

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Is the model 2015 or later? I ask, because those are compatible with all the newest parts.
My best friend gave me her uppababy stroller plus bassinet attachment - 2015 model for my baby that was born in January of this year. We spent about $100 replacing pieces of it and it looks BRAND NEW. We replaced the storage basket on the bottom, added a nice seat cover, got a new bassinet sheet, and added two leather attachments to the handlebar and bar that baby holds onto.
Btw - rejecting a $2,000 stroller is silly. It’s worth it’s weight in gold. Also, uppababy retailers will fix strollers for free for you, I believe. Like if a wheel stops working or whatever. Also, the quality is so good, it doesn’t really break. Have had zero problems with this one and it was run into the ground by my friend.

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We got a new frame replacement….right before we sold

I didn’t expect it to work out that way but right after new frame came my guy stopped using it…so sat in our basement then we sold

I don’t think that warranty works for second owner….

I get it. It’s nice to buy new things. My honest opinion is this is a great item to buy used. Your stroller will get scuffed/dirty very quickly if you use it a lot and are taking it in and out of your car frequently. Like mentioned above, uppababy parts can all be replaced. New fabric, new frame, etc.

Your friends old stroller could save you a ton of money. There are so many things to buy when you’re a new mom, I would take advantage of this. I know it can feel weird to buy used, but honestly all this stuff can be cleaned/replaced to be literally good as new.

The sooner you can jump on the second hand market for kid stuff, the better, IMO. You’ll realize kids go through things SO FAST. Even if you can afford all new, you can save yourself 50% or more of that cost to put in a college fund or something.

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Really helpful thoughts - thank you!!!

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“Thanks so much for the offer! I’m sure you understand this, but I’m really excited to buy my own new one. Just a first time mom thing, I guess!” and just keep declining politely but firmly.

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Yup!

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You could take it and let her know it will be used as a second stroller at Grandparents house.

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This one. Also, we had one to take out and one inside while the baby was a newborn, because I had a c section and it is was difficult to carry her around the house.
She also loved the walks around the house or to be in the stroller while I was doing something else next to her.

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I’d thank her and take it and then assess the shape. If it ends up being in good shape, why not use it and save some money? If it’s trashed, get a new one and if she asks say something like “omg yes the wheel fell off / canopy ripped on a car door / car seat adapter broke” or some excuse to get a new one.

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So if it's not in the condition you want offer to give it back to her so she can resell or donate it elsewhere.

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“Thanks but my parents/in-laws surprised us and bought one for us already”

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Ok. This would be my favorite. Puts blame on someone else. And you get new stroller

Take it and use as backup, travel stroller. We have a ton of strollers, half second hand just for that. I have a city stroller (new), running one (used, free), I bought a bassinet that we only used for NB stage and then sold on marketplace and then we have two free/used travel strollers. These are great because the airlines punish your strollers, toss and scuff them and you really don’t want your best city stroller damaged from mishandling. Worst case, it gathers dust and you can sell on marketplace to someone who will be happy to take it off your hands. Also, just wanted to say congrats on your baby and have fun!! It’s such an exciting time!

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A2. I’m with you on stroller count/function

However I can’t imagine traveling anywhere with my vista. We had an umbrella break on way to Europe vacation…rented a city mini and fell in love. Bought one when we got home and found it sturdy enough for city/cobblestone travel and spin/light enough to stash in restaurants and travel with.

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One more though. A vista isn’t great for putting in car/using away from home. Super heavy/awkward. Consider a snap and go frame when a baby or a city mini ….still sturdy but way better fold

Then when baby a little bigger there are many tiny/packable strollers….my guy was big and we live in city so vista was main stroller but city mini was car/travel…

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M3. Thanks. I had five strollers and city mini was best all around even before you consider price

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See if it's still under warranty and have her put in a request to replace the frame. That's what my sister in law did when her Uppababy was a few years old.

Otherwise, agree on taking it and leaving it at parents house or as backup stroller.

And, as others have mentioned, I understand where your friend is coming from. Even if you don't otherwise have a huge hand me down mentality, the sheer amount of stuff and money for things that can only be used for months or a few years at best quickly becomes mind-boggling.

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I can relate to this so much. My in-laws always want to drop off their stuff at our house but we ended up just donate / trash because they’re in such poor shape then they get all mad at us for doing it. At this point we just politely decline all “gifts”

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What condition are you worried about? A stroller is not like a car seat in that you need to be worried about previous accidents or anything. If it’s a little scuffed up you’re being hilarious. Your baby will spit up on your brand new stroller almost immediately. I would gladly take my friend up on this offer, it’s incredibly wasteful to buy new in this scenario.

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D. I’m with you. It’s ok to want some new things with new baby….!

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Maybe check for the expiration on some of these items like stroller and car seat.. that could be a great excuse to get out of this situation if items are expired or close to expiration

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Thank! That’s a really good point.

She’s a very emotional friend so my thought would be to just lie and say we are so grateful but want to go with a different make / model (and hope she doesn’t notice that we will likely have the same stroller as she tried to give us.)

My husband thinks we should ask to see the condition of it and then (of course thank her) but make a decision. In my head, this seems ruder to me than the white lie but I’m not sure why.

Because money isn’t an issue for us, I also tried to get her to donate it but she’s not interested.

Any thoughts on the least rude path to take here?

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I agree with your husband on this, ask to see pictures, it will soften the blood when you say you don't want it.

The worst thing for any friendship is to do something out of a sense of obligation. Don't feel you have to accept her offer to spare her feelings, you will wind up bearing the burden of that on your shoulders. That's not fair to you or the friendship you have with her. Be honest after you've seen the pics. If it's in great condition, it might work out for both of you. If not, then you can just say you want something in newer condition. How she handles the truth isn't really on you.

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I get what you are feeling. I also wanted everything new with my first and could comfortably afford it. I have an aversion to handmedowns for newborns. You could say that you mentioned to family and they had already got you a new stroller as a gift. Also if you plan on more children in the future, the new gear you acquire is more likely to last vs having to buy something new down the road anyway.

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I love hand me downs but a fresh new ridiculously expensive stroller that I picked out every part of was one of my joys. I ended up with five…don’t laugh….they were all very different :)

I’d take it as a back up/grandparents stroller

The hand me down thing is weird…people have emotion around it and it adds one more thing to your list of things to manage.

Something tells me this friend would not have been interested in a used stroller with her first….maybe her second…but that’s not where you are!

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You can tell her some dear ones or relatives Gifted you new items without your knowledge and politely ask her to donate her suff.

Whoa. UppaBaby strollers are the shit. I got one used from a cousin who had it handed down to her from another cousin. I never would have bought one new but I LOVE this stroller. You can get a car seat brand new and an adapter to fit whatever version it is (seriously… mine was at least 12 years old). It’s an incredible stroller. Weigh your options carefully! Best of luck!

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