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“My history is this: I could get pregnant but they all resulted in miscarriage. This was definitely strong evidence to me that I had an egg quality issue. My fertility specialist tried to support my pregnancies with drugs but nothing worked. Her next suggestion was IVF with genetic testing of embryos - which would be done in another city. With a hearty minimum charge of $18000. I could not stand the thought of spending that much, knowing there was a strong chance of me just miscarrying in the end. After all, I could get pregnant and I really believed IVF was for patients who had trouble conceiving.
One day, while I waited for an appoint with Dr B, I read a magazine she had there called creation families. There was an article about a family who went to Prague for IVF.
So that started my whole research about having treatment there. I, like you, was so conflicted about whether I should give up the idea of my own genetics.
So I went over for a round with my own egg retrieval. There, they could price genetic testing for much less. Alas, at the end of it all, I only had two embryos survive, so I didn’t do genetic testing (as genetic testing was primarily to choose the best ones to transfer). I transferred both and it failed.
(Just for info: an IVF trial there was 1200EU. Drugs were 900EU. And genetic testing would have been an extra 1000eu.)
In restrospect, maybe I should have done the genetic testing to really find out of my egg quality. Then maybe I would have had info on that.
But after that didn’t work, I went through a lot of emotional challenge on whether donation would be the right decision. I spent days and days on forums with people who had done it, I researched endlessly...
I had so many questions: will I feel the same about my child as if it were genetic, will it look like us at all, will the child grow to have emotional issues about her history etc.
In the end, my husband and I made this decision more of a pragmatic one: we wanted a child. Our odds of success were over 50% with donor and less than 20% with my eggs.
I can tell you now that every little bit of anxiety and worry I had is completely gone. I have zero worries of whether our child will have questions about her history and zero worries about if she will have any issues. I love our story and have already started to share bits and pieces with her.
In terms of treatment, there are several options available overseas - all also available in Canada for much more $. I just met a new friend here who did egg donation through Toronto twice. She remortgaged her house and it cost her $100000 for the two trial. In Czech it costs 4500Eu for a fresh donation.
In terms of treatment - for fresh donation you have to be there in Czech. All donations are anonymous by law. So you cannot take any eggs or embryos back to Canada. Canada’s law requires information about the eggs / embryos that you would not be privy to.
For a fresh donation cycle you would need to be in Czech for about 10 days. And just once. Hubby needs to be there for retrieval for fertilization and then 5 days later for transfer. You also need to have a doctor on board at home who will follow your drugs, do ultrasound for lining etc. Here, that was a challenge: we don’t have a fertility clinic so I had to drive to a neighbouring province for ultrasound. You do not need to go for an assessment. I happened to be in Paris a few months before my plan for first IVF treatment. So I caught a train and went for an assessment - but it’s not necessary and it’s unusual for their international clients.
One thing to know about Fresh donation in Czech is that you own all the eggs - so you would likely have enough embryos for multiple transfers. You can also do a shared cycle for cheaper. My fiend did two shared cycle treatments. Gives you an idea of $$$ difference. They also have a 3 failed cycles = 4th free. But it would never come to that. Stats show for donation that after 3 cycles over 90% are successful.
I should tell you though - I’m giving you tons of info on egg donation in Czech. But I didn’t do egg donation. I did embryo donation. It was cheaper, better odds of outcome, simpler procedure and chad didn’t need to fly over. We figured since donation would not produce a full genetic child, we didn’t care about it being half.. sometimes I think maybe we should have gone the other way - donated eggs. But now that we have our daughter we would have it no other way. It’s so funny .... people say she looks like me. I think she’s a spit of My husband. So remarkable. And she is so much like him!
But i had researched intensely about egg donation in Czech so can help with any questions. And I have a friend would went over after me for egg donation and I know extensively of her experience.
One thing that came up in my research of donation etc is that all humans are 99.9% genetically similar (or something like that). It’s a very small percentage that make us all unique. So even though she’s not a genetic offspring, she’s already so genetically similar. That fact made it easier for me to let go of wanting the genetic offspring.
Also, there is so much research now into genetic manifestation. Genes are determined at conception... no question. But how genes manifest are also affected by incubation. So the carrying mother actually does have so much to do about how the child develops. For example, they transferred two identical horse embryos into two different carrying mother horses. Bring identical, the horses should have been also born identical. But they were not. They were very unique from one another. It was solid evidence that the mother’s incubation environment helps genes manifest in a unique way. Kind of getting off topic here - but that really helped me let go of the need to be the genetic mom. Having my daughter grow in my belly was enough. And knowing that my pregnancy would help determine the person she would be born as also helped me cope with letting go of the genes idea.
Thank you for the detailed information
Thank you for sharing
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