{ "media_type": "text", "post_content": "Any wfh moms here take care of their babies full time during work hours (meaning no nannies or daycare) while being employed full time? FTM and curious to know if it’s doable at all.", "post_id": "61f9023daacf15003901793e", "reply_count": 39, "vote_count": 2, "bowl_id": "58f81646ae9f610010f869be", "bowl_name": "Consulting Moms", "feed_type": "bowl" }

Any wfh moms here take care of their babies full time during work hours (meaning no nannies or daycare) while being employed full time? FTM and curious to know if it’s doable at all.

like
Posting as :
works at
You are currently posting as works at
Highlighted IconHIGHLIGHTED

Not doable, IMHO. Not with a job in consulting.

Picture this. You return to work after your leave. Your baby is around 3.5 months old. She naps 30 mins at a time during which you used a bathroom, turned on your laptop, had a snack, looked at your calendar for 15 minutes.. she is up.. now you are trying to extend that nap.. rocking for 15 mins during which you got pings from the client (you showed "away"), you understand she won't nap now.. you start the routine.. play.. she hates tummy time and cranky from lack of sleep so she's fussing, you can't take your eyes off her for the next 2 hrs.. your pings are unanswered, the client is not happy... you put her down for nap again, rushing to your laptop.. log-in, ping the client, read email... oh shoot, you have a meeting for the next hour.. 40 mins into your meeting your baby is screaming, she's up again.. you think I'll try to extent a nap again.. bluetooth headset in one ear, walking around the house wearing a baby, she feel asleep (thank god). The meeting is running over, someone is calling you out.. you start talking and waking up your baby.. needless to say your answer is not helpful to anyone on the call... someone calls you with an urgent question after, you would've told them to call later but you feel guilty for your underperformance.. so you are on that call, looking at your laptop.. the baby is content in her bouncer for once. Starts fussing 20 mins later, you are desperate so you turning on TV and put her in front of it. She is quite for another 10 mins. You have to end the fall bc its time to change her diaper and feed her. After the feeding, she spat up.. time to change her clothes... logging back in you see 15 pings, tasks piling up, client frustration growing... oh, and you haven't even taken your baby for a daily stroll..

I don't know anyone whose babies were super predictable perfect nappers so I wouldn't expect that to be your case. As babies grow, they need much more stimulation, food preparation, etc.

This were my days when our nanny couldn't come in.

likehelpfulsmart

Omg. This takes me back….I wasn’t trying to wfh…just shower and do laundry and that was a challenge….thank you for the laugh.

I worked from home with my now toddler since she was 4 months old. I single-handedly made it with with occasional help, but she was in school by 3 years. She’s now 4.5 and loves school and thrives in it. She’s an independent kiddo and we personally made it work, my workload was very heavy but I used to manage during naps and late nights and kept her busy with her toys and things (at this rate we have our own lil Montessori). We didn’t have any family around and I personally had a hard time trusting others at that time so made it work. Also once the pandemic started my spouse was WFH for almost a full year.

like

PS - this was difficult and I can’t believe time flied and I managed. Wouldn’t recommend it, but I did it. We now have a much healthier balance and we both as parents put in the work to keep it flowing.

Recent IconRecent

Many of us were forced to do this during the early pandemic and it cost us all sanity, mental health, a level of stress we’d never experienced before, work performance, some had to sacrifice their jobs or take leave, etc. It’s not sustainable, and if you do it you end up doing both subpar, rather than doing either one well.

like

I did this in pandemic,costed me my sleep, as i worked from 4-9 in morning, with kid from
9-5 while husband worked.6-10 again in eve …i was a zombiee.it significantly impacted my health, our relationship and obviously my performance at work.. i would never choose it unless that is the only option to survive

like

Haha NO I’ve said this like five times recently on this app… you need childcare. It is some crazy covid stuff that people now seem to think you might not.

like

I see your posts on this and wish there was a super like button.

like

Even if your child is super independent, you’re stepping away at a minimum for feedings, diaper changes, and when it’s nap time to put them down and get them up. When my daughter is home with me because she’s sick, I can get some work done, but no where near what it takes to be successful. And that’s with a husband who splits the day with me when she’s home with us.

like

Maybe you can sort of survive doing this for a few months, but as soon as they start to crawl it’s impossible. But why torture yourself? The only thing that has kept me sane as a mom is good childcare

like

My baby goes to nursery full time (8.30am - 5.30pm) but stays home whenever she’s sick and let me tell you I can’t do any work outside her naps… I wouldn’t be able to make it work for us.

like

And you don’t know what type of mapper you will have….maybe minimal. Also. I found if hime with baby hard time work during. So because I was so exhausted…

Babies need activity and stimulation. This isn’t fair on either of you.

like

It is SURVIVABLE short term when the kid is sick or the nanny unexpectedly cancels but is no way a doable plan A.

like

No

like

No. Just no.

like

A hard no….

like

Just echoing all the hard NOs here for another data point if needed

like

I have a friend who is a independent contributor in a highly technical field and literally has 4 meetings in a month, has been able to keep her 3 yo at home with her since birth. She also doesn’t work Fridays and is super competent in her field which is very niche. I and most working women I know can’t do it even though childcare is bleeding us… If I had resources, I would probably get childcare for few hours during weekend as well…

likefunny

I have FT daycare and a babysitter 4 hrs on Saturday mornings. 🙋‍♀️

likeuplifting

As another data point, I have been WFH while having my parents watch mine for most of the day while I pop in at times to feed and put down for naps. (My baby didn't do well with bottles, though older now and having better luck transitioning to sippy cups.) Even with just that I find it rather distracting, and have to do a lot of working around meetings, with some coordination with the husband (who is also WFH and juggling meetings). Eagerly waiting to get off the waitlist at daycare because this is not sustainable and I know I'm not as productive as I should be.

like

I also do a lot of catchup work at night as that's the only way I'm able to get by. But that's after dinner, bath, and bedtime routine. So really working nonstop.

Our friends did that for a while (2 years), but she was a teacher with a schedule that had breaks built in during the day. With that said, she said it was total hell. From my side, I tried to take a few listening in calls when our baby was sick, and I couldn’t even make it through the hour.

like

The hardest part about a schedule like this is you have no time for yourself to mentally decompress. It's incredibly wearing.

like

No no no no no no no no noooooooo

like

Unless your job is extremely flexible with which hours you work and meetings are minimal or you have back up, it’s super super hard. Kept my daughter home as long as I could in the pandemic since she was too young to be vaccinated. She went to my parents 3-4 days a week but they are older and sometimes had appointments making it hard on those days. Eventually, I basically got in trouble for it and was told I need distraction free work time and the stress of it all really got to me. I hadn’t missed any client deliverables and was doing well but that didn’t seem to matter. I am grateful for my own sanity and balance that she is in preschool now but her school closes for COVID cases and it’s really just hard if you have stuff that isn’t flexible going on.

like

Don’t do it - either quit your job or find childcare options that work for you. After zero childcare options during 2019, I took a LOA for a few months until I was comfortable with my childcare options

Or downsize your role to create more time in the day / less guilt that you’re not fully invested in it… but even then it’s hard

Related Posts

Has anyone any experience working remote from the Carabean? Looking for a place with good internet connection and reasonable rent. I would relocate for a year with two teenage boys.

like

Need suggestion!!

I am working at 12 lpa, having one offer of 20lpa fixed (remote). Having 5YOE in QA selenium uft capybara.

Should I continue looking for better offers?
If yes, what should be my expectations?

Also, say if I get another offer, will it be okay to say No to the previous offer? I mean they trusted me and gave more than expectation earlier.

like

Hey! I’m new to fishbowl and am looking for a career pivot (my fur baby, Leia, is very supportive). Any advice for a career pivoter with some imposter syndrome transitioning from owning a small healthcare practice to the corporate world? Thanks!

Post Photo
likeuplifting

FT to-be mother 8weeks pregnant. Did anyone have cramp-like pain and weird dreams? Any advice for this newbie here? How to prepare for the journey?

like

I have two offers one from Adobe (consultant)(14.4 fixed lpa + 1.6 variable) and Nagarro(18.5 fixed lpa + 1 variable).
Can anyone help me where I will get good exposure and help with pros and cons? Where to join? I am really confused.
Note: Nagarro is full remote and Adobe is calling banglore. I have 3.8 yoe

like

When did you tell families you were pregnant?

I have a family trip in a week, where I'll be 11 weeks pregnant. Seems like a great opp to tell my family all in person, but I'm not sure if it's too early. This is my first (and first for either of our families, for that matter).

like

Looking for remote, hybrid or in person executive assistant opportunities in entertainment!

like

Why do we love practicing law when it’s filled with toxic behavior? I’m literally sitting in ER because of an ill parent and busy drafting while we wait for a doctor.

like

I’m about to be offered a freelance contract that sounds like it could be fairly long term. It would start as a couple months to start and then revisit contract. I’m due with my second in May. I don’t feel the need to share that now since it’s remote and I’m only 15 weeks, but I also worry about them investing time in me and wanting me to sign a longer term contract only for me to be like I can’t work past May 1. Thoughts?

like

Anyone have insight into Goodwin’s remote positions? They aren’t listed on their careers page.

like
like

What are the best WFH laptops, or laptops you hate and would avoid at all costs?
Contract company has me on a loaner Lenovo think pad that doesn’t work well. The performance suffers when im both on virtual desktop and zoom, so I have to use an iPad to zoom otherwise my audio cracks out. I’ll be buying a new laptop soon and need ideas. Ideally around or under $1,500 - I do get some reimbursement so money isn’t a deciding factor.

like

Any chance visa will go fully remote in the future?

like

Did any of the JPM employees buy earpods and get them reimbursed as part "WFH camera/headphones" category? #JPMCHASE

like

6 months pregnant here, unhappy with my job. Would it be stupid to interview now? Should I wait until after maternity leave?

like

Hey PMs! Any advice on how to implement a new process? I’m new at this agency and don’t have a PM background. Company is 100% remote. It’s my 1st experience implementing anything new and w/ people I don’t know. Feel free to point me to any training or articles too! (Sorry I’m sure it’s a basic question for you)

like

Does EY gds provide wfh?

like

WFH is bringing me back to my college days of blasting ratchet music when I really should be diligently working at 11 am.

likefunnyuplifting

I’m interested in remote talent management manager level opportunities (performance management and succession planning, talent program mgmt). I’ve been in global manufacturing for close to 10 years and open to staying in industry or making a change to tech if anyone has opportunities in this area. Thanks!

like

Quick question for all mommas:
When you were on maternity leave did you take your babies to daycare during the end of your maternity leave? If so for how long, month week a couple days?

like

Additional Posts in Consulting Moms

I m a fresher in frontend development and working in react now with 1year. Is it good area for growth or should i look for other fields.
And anyone know what is usual pay for react after 3 year of experience

like

I don’t see a lot of senior roles on Linkedin or Indeed. Where else should I be looking? I’ve been looking since October and doesn’t seem like lots of new roles are added.

like

Hi ,
I'm working as a SAP Security consultant in TCS since last 4.8 years. I'm having knowledge in GRC , FIORI , Hana , IDM also.
I'm looking for a job switch. Kindly refer me for SAP Security and GRC consultant in @Mindtree

like

H1B for Brazilians is capped to 2 years due to reciprocity. Does that mean we get another renewal chance or are we only up for 4 years total?

like

TCS Digital vs Infy TA (slightly higher package) ?

like
like

How much should a 5-6 year hvac technician receive in the state of Florida?

I’m looking for recommendations of photography studios who work with smaller budgets but have a strong vision and can create smart, conceptual work. Up and coming shops, creative solutions and unique points of view.

Any suggestions?

Is The Ladders legit / worth it?

like

Things to ask your new boss on your first day/1:1?

like

Milbank matched Cravath! Why did I see like no buzz about this here lol

likefunny

How long until I get a decision from Wells Fargo Trading Associate second round? First round was two weeks ago, did very well on the technical against three directors. Then I was shortlisted for the in-office interview yesterday with same three directors and two additional managers. However they did not tell me when to expect to hear back and now HR is not responding. Was ghosted by the hiring manager as well

like

Why is this bowl so dead? Where are my fellow Salesforce consultants?!?!

like
like

When do we get hike letters in birlasoft?

Take a look at Lessontrader.com. An online marketplace for teachers to buy and sell resources. All of your hard earned work for virtual learning can be posted on lessontrader and make you some extra money! FREE membership with discount code “vipfree”. Once you upload a lesson there is nothing else needed. Just wait and collect once someone buys your stuff.

Post Photo
like

Hi folks,

Please share Deloitte policies for reimbursement of SAP certification, I am planning to give the same..

As we have option of buying 6 attempts or 1 attempt and there cost varies ..So, how the organisation will reimburse in this scenario or are we Bound to go for 1 attempt only.

like

You're down 60%? You mean 60% so far, right? Preserve.

Post Photo
like

Best way to study for reg in 2 weeks? Mainly concerned with grasping the Corp and Property tax material in such a short time 😩😩

like

Anyone regularly buy bonds from treasury direct? I'm considering buying EE bonds for each of my young kids now plus setting up a small but recurring I bond monthly purchase for myself.

like

Additional Posts (overall)

Any Chicago mamas out there that want to connect? I'm an expecting mom

like

Quick question for all mommas:
When you were on maternity leave did you take your babies to daycare during the end of your maternity leave? If so for how long, month week a couple days?

like

I’ve got Mom Guilt for letting my 15 month old watch TV when he’s grumpy. Some days it’s a lot. Should I really feel guilty about this? It’s usually YouTube channel with kids’ songs we like to sing.

What were your costs of giving birth if you were on a high deductible health plan? I was on a non-hdhp last time and paid $200 but considering switching to hd this year before i give birth again. Thank you!

like

Toddler still wakes up multiple times during the night for milk bottle. I just can't seem to get myself to let her cry it out. Most nights it's fine between the husband and me. But some nights...

Baby got vaccines today, and I wanted to cry with her. 😭 😭

like

Has anyone figured out an efficient way to determine what stores and pharmacies still have formula? There's gotta be a better way than just calling around (and mostly failing), right?

like

Anyone ever put their electric breast pump into a checked bag? Thinking of doing it, somehow seems odd to me (like it could get damaged) but logically it should be fine, right?

Does anyone have any advice on how to push back on unreasonable demands (e.g. supervisor tells you Friday afternoon they want a complete draft Monday morning, when you're not meeting with the client for a week)? I don't want special treatment because I have kids, but a little consideration would be nice when the night/weekend work isn't actually necessary.

like

First time mom with an almost 3 Mo old. I feel myself starting to resent my husband because his life hasn't really changed and mine has changed drastically. I want him to take on more responsibility but he thinks he pulls his weight and bringing it up just leads to an argument. I know kids can be hard on marriage. Any advice?

Moms who sent their kids to daycare - when did you feel your kid started going to daycare regularly ? I am started my child this summer (10 MO) and also have a part time sitter until august to cover for sick days ( no family near by ) but would like to know how long to plan for the sitter. I am recently divorced single mother so don’t want to continue having sitter as it is expensive on top of daycare at the same time I can’t work while taking care of a sick child .

like
like

My 3yo was just invited to a classmate’s birthday party, but it’s a joint party for him and his 2yo sister. Is the expectation that we get them each a gift? Or one gift that they can enjoy together? Any suggestions?

like

Anyone have a recommendation for online yoga classes?

Bonus of there are postpartum options.

like

How did people handle pumping in the office/client? How many times a day? Block time on your calendar or try to fit it in btw mtgs? Were you able to pump on a regular schedule or best you can? Tips?

Tips for staying healthy during pregnancy while traveling every week for work? New first timer here!

Baby moves around a lot in her sleep… if crib bumpers are not safe, how do you prevent them from hitting the rails?

like

Would you be interested in a ‘household concierge’ service that provided some of the following benefits (customized to your needs) for an hourly rate?
- meal planning
- grocery shopping/delivery cont

like

Being headhunted when I'm about to go on maternity leave. Not interested atm but it made me curious, what would happen if you wanted to switch jobs during or right after your mat leave?

like

How and when did you announce your pregnancy to your firm? Who do I tell first, then next, and how many weeks did you wait to tell people?

like

New to Fishbowl?

Download the Fishbowl app to
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.