Given the historical, and currently heightened interest in, ways that women have been abused by gender-based power dynamics, what can men do to be better allies to women in consulting?

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Hi HR... 👋

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OP: the problem with your follow up question is that you're asking the innocent to be responsible for the actions of the guilty. Those who treat everyone the same are doing the right thing; are you expecting them to control other people on top of that? Keep in mind that the inevitable consequence is punishment for a good guy because he failed to prevent the actions of his coworker, Brah McFratboy. People should be held accountable for their actions, not someone else's just because they're easier to punish.

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It's all comes down to basic respect to individual. For instance, stopping cutting off would be great. Understand that women's ambitions are just the same as men's. And the last, but most important.. let us be women at work.. I see this a lot - men tend to recognize women who act more masculine and neglect feminine ones as "not serious". I intentionally make myself look asexual and somewhat ugly to not come across as "pretty wannabe".

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The first two replies are obviously from men who are part of the toxic male culture and the third is from a woman. I’d love to hear from some male consultants on what they personally do to be better allies to women in the workforce. My guess is there will be crickets...sadly.

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Male here. I don’t know if this is the right or expected answer. But this is what I do - Treat everyone as an individual. Respect their backgrounds and what they bring to the table. Expect everyone to pull their own weight, but support each other as much as we can. At all times, I keep in mind that everything I am is because of the women in my life - mother, wife, daughter and extended family, co-workers and friends.

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Maybe it’s just me but I just act normal (even around pretty women 👌🏻)

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Male here. I just treat everyone the same. Your a cool guy or girl then cool. You’re an asshole guy or girl, you’re an asshole. You don’t pull your weight, I don’t want to work with you regardless of sex. You’re a dude with nice shoes or outfit, I say that look fresh dude. You’re a girl wearing nice clothes, I say that looks good. Isn’t that fair? Can we not overthink things, and just be chill people to everyone?....unless they’re assholes, then fuck em

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I think you need to decide whether you want equality or special treatment. I treat everyone the same including backing them up when someone unreasonably dismisses what they say. I will also be dismissive if you make a statement which I consider to be poorly researched or untrue after questioning you on how you arrived at that point to understand your reasoning.

likesmart

A question from a future diversity and inclusiveness officer

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This isn’t a war it’s not about alliances.....just use common sense and treat people with respect based on what they bring to the table

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Woman here - I think a lot of men are respectful and supportive individuals. Ive never seen sexual abuse but I do see the dismissal of women quite often. I feel like the opportunity is when someone else, other than you, is dismissive and borderline discriminatory, what do those ‘normal’ men do to support your female co worker. I was in a situation almost to tears every week until I figured out that if I asked my male sr manager to sit in every discussion and literally repeat and support whatever I say in order to get the other guy to actively listen. What would have been amazing was for someone to point out every time he did it and ask him to stop - even if their title was below his. I got out of that situation ASAP but he’s still with the firm being an ass to other people.

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@PwC1 it’s not asking you to be guilty it’s asking you to be allies of women. Instead of shrugging your shoulders when mcfratboy does something idiotic, back up the women who standup for themselves or if mcfratboy is in a position of power and your coworkers feel like they can’t say something, other men are more often in a position to influence culture which is dominated by men.

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Men shouldn’t feel like they have to do something.

Most women can manage the situation themselves.

The powerful men who have used or abused women would have abused many men, not necessarily sexual in nature. Just that it isn’t good for press.

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C1, this post is part of the research (fyi). But I am 100% with you.

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We can stop treating them differently than men. Which, ironically, includes not asking lengthy pseudo-intellectual questions that revolve around victim status for women as a given.

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Consultant 1 - woman with a good sense of humor here. Thanks for assuming my gender.

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Respect everyone for what they are. If they are assholes call it out. That said, this sounds very much like org behaviour group discussion @PM OP

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For those saying things like "I just treat everyone the same" or "I'm nice to everyone", how does that work given the existence of sexism and misogyny?

Well said P1!

PwC1: If you're asking if those who aren't sexist should control the actions of those who are sexist, then, no, I don't believe that is what should be done.

However, my question remains. What should be done given the reality of sexism and misogyny? "Treating people the same", as you suggest, is one option. But, equality of treatment does little to achieve equality of outcomes in a system built on inequality.

And, while few men living today built the sexism and misogyny of our society, we benefit from a system built on gender privilege.

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