Related Posts
Thank you random audit associate
What is the notice period at American Express?
Enthusiast
I don’t want to WORK
Hi guys, looking for 11 likes to enable DM. Thanks.
Additional Posts in Women In Consulting
Pro
Pro
Conversation Starter
Conversation Starter
Conversation Starter
New to Fishbowl?
Download the Fishbowl app to
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
Come and work with meeeeeee....nothing makes me happier than creating a team of successful people, especially women. I’m not at all threatened by anyone and indeed want my teams to be smarter and more skilled than me. I will push and challenge but aim to amplify the best in every individual
Sure
I’ve worked with several micro managers and Regina George/Amanda Priestly types over the past 20 years. It’s all about them and woe to the women who do not recognize her as the alpha female or dare have an independent thought
Working with men is way easier (but then I have a comp sci degree so that helps). Men know how to joke and make fun of each other and still remain friends - women take that 💩personally
I had female bosses at the last two firms I worked at. Pure hell (cliquish, passive aggressive, rude). Now I work for a super cool male boss. The difference is night and day. And I have LOTS of women friends and support sisterhood whenever possible.
Most of them, honestly.
@D5 when they stop judging and reflect.
I’ve had the opposite experience! Every female manager (direct or up the chain) I’ve worked with has gone out of their way to help me. I’ve also had amazing male bosses, but it’s just not 100%.
Oh wow I’m a woman and I prefer working with woman and actually fear I favor them... guess everyone is different
Yes and I don’t understand it. I’d rather work with men tbh
same here! I'm having issues on my current project with female SM, not sure if she's trying to prove herself or just the working styles that's driving me nuts. thanks
I’ve had hostile female clients. My theory is that they worked so hard to get to their position, that they fear anyone new that could jeopardize that position.
Tbh- I’m a manager and younger than most of my team. I’m trying to enable and empower, but some women outright dismiss my guidance and are the first to throw me under the bus for the slightest inconvenience. When I have to be stern, I’m the “bitch”. If the Partner uses the same words verbatim, he’s being authoritative. There’s no winning.
What I have seen is that the senior women tend to fall into one of three camps: those that are awesome and supportive (rare - less than 15-20%?), those that are threatened and act catty (50%) - this comes out in either giving more attractive women a harder time, or being a “mean girl” with women who are less conventionally attractive, less fashionable, etc., and the remainder, women who feel the need to drive every woman that they work with harder and harder to “prove” that they are, in fact, just as “alpha” as any male peer. I have had women I worked for comment on my body way more than any men I’ve experienced, question my intelligence and capability in meetings and IN FRONT OF the customer to make herself look better, and deliberately undermine me. I have also had incredible women go above and beyond to support and mentor me... but if you asked me blind if I would rather work for an unknown man or an unknown woman, I would take the man every time. It sucks, but it’s real. I think many of us who experienced it are actively trying to change it - I make a huge point of mentoring women on my teams, and hopefully being part of the solution.
@C2, I just continue being as nice to them as I am with anyone else, or even nicer. I try to get them to know me as a person and vice versa. I have to fight to not let them get to me or let them decrease my performance by letting them get to my head.
I also try to build strong ties to other senior people on the team so that (hopefully) I’m not just beholden to their opinion and more people can get a holistic view of me. There should never be a reason for anyone else to view my behavior towards this person as problematic. And internally I just accept that not everyone’s going to be with you in this journey and that’s fine. The great thing about consulting is that there are plenty of other amazing managers both male and female, and that all projects have an end date :)
One was and the other was great and my best advocate. It's not a female boss thing, it's an individual thing. It's just that there are too few female bosses so we're more likely to take the behavior of a small number of bad female bosses as indicative of larger trends.
Have you guys heard about those studies that say that you're more likely to perceive a woman as hostile/mean/bossy than a man exhibiting the exact same behaviors? Maybe also a good time to check your own biases.
I've had great female and male leaders.
this is a great point. I do reflect on this when I think they my perceptions of my managers.
not for me but sorry that they’re being hostile towards you, that’s never fun
Yes, and it makes me incredibly sad. My worst experiences at work have been with women throwing me under the bus to further their own career. Not that men are immune from doing this, but it does seem more prevalent in women. Any guesses on the root cause? Not sure...
Do you think women actually do it more or it feels worse when they do it? Or both
This thread makes me so sad! What can we do to do better for each other? I’ve had a mixed bag of horrible and great female managers and also a mixed bag of horrible and great male managers
I try to focus on the individual and her talents and strengths and goals. I’ve been told by my female team members that I’m a good leader because I focus on them as an individual rather than measuring them based on my experiences or perceptions.
My favorite 3 managers have all been women
Yep, had a wildly condescending project manager but she didn’t have that same audacity toward the guys on the team.
Sad that most people on this thread have experienced this. Granted it could be a biased sampling, but would have been nice to see more people not have this experience
I think everyone should take a moment to step back. I think there is a lot of generalization and a lot of exaggeration and a huge lack of support. Several people asked what we can do, I think the first step is to recognize that a lot of the above is a generalization or an exaggeration.
D6 we may be talking about the same person at D!! Shudder to think there are so many like her
Worked with plenty of women MDPs/ Principals and never noticed any difference than with men. I love working on teams with lots of women, but try to keep my bias in check when staffing and pick both male and female As/Cs. I’m sorry so many have had such poor experiences. OP- which system are you in??
I have had very positive experiences working with female leaders. they easily identify when you are holding yourself back and are very encouraging.