Has any of you cried at work? I cried at work (in the bathroom) yesterday over a review and felt horrible afterwards.

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I have. Stuff happens. Sometimes tears are how I deal with it. No need to feel bad about it, especially if no one saw you.. You had a private moment in the bathroom.

likeuplifting

Yes. And I have had several men and women cry in my office. We are all human.

Hugs.

likeuplifting
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Been there...and still there. It’s okay to cry;) it’s okay to feel unfair. Just remember we all have those cloudy days and the sun will always rise again ☀️

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I’ve found that during a stressful/emotional day I feel better after excusing myself to the bathroom for a quick cry rather than holding it in. Do what you gotta do to get through the day

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I probably cry on average once every 2 weeks. Mostly hotel at the end of a day, but I’d say once every 1-2 months in the bathroom or in front of someone. I put it down to high expectations and lack of sleep.

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Come to BCG and cut your crying rate by ~half

likefunny

Yes. 2x have had someone ‘make’ me cry during a difficult conversation, but I successfully made it to the bathroom. I recently cried in my partner’s office because I was worried about the team getting all of the work done. I did not want that to happen but it actually made him decide to be more helpful to me. Chin up! Happens to the best of us.

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Yes a few times. Here if you want to talk. Just DM me.

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Agree. Sending good thoughts, OP!

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Yes, and it turned into a panic attack and my PL friend came in to help me breathe through it. You’re not alone, it’s not that uncommon. We all work very hard, and take a lot of pride in what we do, and to top it all off, we work in “feedback intensive” places.

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I have literally sobbed at least once on every project I have been in for my 8 years in consulting. When I was younger and on some crappier projects (and hadn’t learned to manage my own emotions a bit better) this sometimes happened weekly. My best friend and I started consulting (at different firms) after college and have always talked about finding places to cry and consistentness of that experience. All this to say - of course. You are going to be ok, it’s normal.

This job is stressful! The emotions are real! I’ve found mediation, therapy, and a full filing personal life help in the long term, and a brisk walk outside, a little treat (special coffee or smoothie or sparkling water or going for a lunch I like), maybe ten minutes of an audiobook or podcast I like helps in the moment.

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Not my finest moment but it happened. I will never do it again in front of anyone. I will now always excuse myself and cry in the bathroom or go home where I can be comforted alone in my room or with loved ones nearby. You did good. Hang in there.

upliftinglike

always have

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If you pinch yourself really hard multiple times, your brain will take the focus off whatever you're crying about onto that spot of pain. I know it's a really sick way of avoiding to cry. It's even worse that my mother taught me this when I was really young. Anyway, it works if you don't want to cry at that very moment.

likehelpful

Yes, I cried in the bathroom just a month after joining the firm. But I’m still here after 3 years. I always tell myself - it’s just a bad day, not a bad life. Hang in there ❤️

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*btw, I know this is not a good thing (how easy I cry, how high expectations are or amount of sleep I get). And something I’m trying to improve on. But data point for you 😉

likehelpful

That’s fair. My perspective is fact that the job causes me to cry this frequently isn’t a good thing, I had a perfectly successful career before McK where I’d cry once a year max. I just don’t think it is a way to live my life so need to work out the right levers to pull to improve that.

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I did. Even worse I had an anxiety attack that I had to run to the bathroom to take a deep breath so I wouldn’t break down in front of the client. I talked to my Partner; he agreed I shouldn’t work with the person who made my cry. I was rolled off and I started interviewing externally. I left the company recently and now very happy at the new one.

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So few things I’m trying to do 1) we had a good training on inner voices - I’m trying to recognise the inner voice that leads me to crying and amplify other voices to drown it out, sounds silly but has helped a lot 2) breathing exercises and headspace - try to do a quick headspace each day which teaches you a bunch of exercises for high pressure situations. If I recognise it I’ll take 2 mins out to walk/sit in bathroom and breath.

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Can you share any more context on this training? Sounds helpful for self regulation.

what I wanted to say is to make sure you always have Visine and a tight circle of friends. You are not alone

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I cried myself in the office a few times. Specially after workshops (that required an insane amount of work to put together).
You’ll feel better.
Reflict on the review, talk to your PD advisor/mentor and go on. You got this!

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We talked about this at work recently with my female colleagues. The answer was that we all cry at work (probably not every month but at least annually). A lot of us said it was our way to release anger or stress.

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Yes, happened before. It humanizes us and any decent human understands that emotions and stress are expressed in many ways, tears being one.

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