Has anybody else experienced a time when a female coworker that you looked up to put you down? I’ll start: I stumbled into an automation project that was going to help close the labor gap & decrease machine downtime. I had 2 more classes left of my degree, but I was leading meetings and meeting with possible vendors. As soon as school started, she switched the meeting times to when she knew I’d be in class and hijacked my entire project. I wish it ended differently.

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Yes I have...


Damn. I did (when I was a sales executive) have a female coworker who I looked up to bc she had been in sales for long (and I was pretty new) get really threatened by my success to the point of by the time I went to my manager and HR, they said several others had come forward on my behalf already for me. She got hyper competitive - it was insane. I stayed in my lane and eventually she got fired for other reasons. But yeah it was really unnecessary. I’ve never had a man do that to me….


Yes, I’ve had a similar situation. Don’t take it personally. I’d say everything happens for a reason. If you expressed that you cannot make the times she scheduled the meetings for then I’d do the following:

Review the notes from each session.
Meet with the project manager at times that work for you.
Send out your thoughts/recommendations to the project team.

Long story short don’t allow her to highjack the project their are always cunning ways for you to provide input and show that your not a easy target.


At my previous company, our IT Director happened to be a woman. She was part of my interview process and I always thought it was so bad ass that she led a whole group of men. Early on, I expressed some of my struggles in my role and she assured me that she wanted to fix any issues. She even said that I could reach out to her to talk any time. Well, months later, my situation at work got worse & she dodged my attempts to contact. It sucked to think that she was just being a fake leader.


Yes. In the interview process we vibed and spoke at great length and passion about the work. But actually working for her was extremely different. She did little to instruct or mentor me but took time out of her work critiques to make front stabbing comments or back handed compliments. It honestly broke my spirit a bit. I now am more wary about my expectations regarding work idols. Many people unfortunately fail upwards and not all talented contributors are people leaders.


I had a male boss do that to me. It’s not about gender. It’s about personality type. Selecting gender causes gaslighting and bias. My boss at the time made a request at 7am and told me I needed to have it printed professionally and be at the other office location 2 hours away in another state by 10. Most shops didn’t open til 9 and it was massive. I frantically called while running around the house. When I get there with one minute to spare he wouldn’t let me present it and shared what he had drawn on a cocktail napkin the night before. I was beyond furious and disgusted. Also, apparently he had setup the meeting two days prior and didn’t tell me about it


Certain kinds of middle management take credit for your work rather than championing you for it unfortunately

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