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Daily Reflections Recurring Post
January 18, 2021
WOULD A DRINK HELP?
By going back in our own drinking histories, we could show that years before we realized it we were out of control, that our drinking even then was no mere habit, that it was indeed the beginning of a fatal progression.
— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 23
Click link for today’s full reading: https://www.aa.org/pages/en_US/daily-reflection
Sober Sunday check in ... how is everyone doing?
Bowl Leader
I’ve certainly experienced it. I believe there are a few things that are happening when the “switch” happens.
Most people have heard that drinking (and drugs) lowers our inhibitions, so we do and say what we would do if we knew there were no consequences. This is probably true in some situations, but I believe the scarier part of going from Jekyll to Hyde is that when we partake in our addiction, the disease comes into control, and the disease can release and amplify all our fears and insecurities.
Basically we hyper excite our egos and go on a rampage to appease a swollen and sensitive ego. This is futile though, and the disease tells us more of our DoC (drug of choice) is good, so we just go deeper and deeper into the darkness of a sickened soul.
I have heard of this and actually hit my rock bottom recently with my Hyde coming out. I blacked out drinking and was doing and saying things I would not normally do nor do I feel the way of the things I said.
My therapist and I discussed how I tend to function in my limbic, and I have ADHD so I am naturally more emotional than others. Since I am primarily in my limbic, the distance between a freak out and calm is much smaller than those who reside in their pre-frontal cortex.
Also, she shared with me how a recent study showed in brain scans that after 1-2 drinks (regardless of body size) our prefrontal cortex goes dark while our limbic system remains active. Which can sometimes explain why someone may behave in a completely opposite way of their sober nature.
I disagree with people (now that I’ve gone through some experiences of my own) who say that “drunk statements are sober thoughts” or that how a person behaves blacked out is still a reflection of them. I for one can say that no, me blacked out and saying mean things is NOT me and NOT my true thoughts. I may feel insecure about something sober but me lashing out my insecurities while drunk does not mean I’m insecure with the triggering incident while drunk. My therapist and I have world extensively on me forgiving myself for Mr. Hyde behaviors. She reminds me that no, if I were sober, I would NOT have behaved in the ways that I did and that gives me peace and reminds me that I am a good person.
Yep S2 is more of people finding themselves, their destinies etc
http://victorianminds.qwriting.qc.cuny.edu/mind-and-self/blurred-lines-victorian-views-of-drug-experimentation-in-the-strange-case-of-dr-jekyll-and-mr-hyde-and-the-moonstone/dr-jekyll-and-mr-stevenson/
Like many others, I read the book growing up and remembered the overall plot, but that was it…until I made a connection recently to my own personality as someone who drinks…
There’s a lot of research around the duality of human personality…and the book converges with thinking in psychology etc…
But only recently did I read about how RL Stevenson was on a cocaine binge for 6 days while he wrote the book…
The realization helped me “wake up” and wanted to share the thought as it may help others…