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Yea it’s called social anxiety. Get on lexapro
Just go
The more you bail the easier it becomes to bail. Just gotta consciously break the cycle and maybe start with really non intimidating stuff like just a coffee or bubble tea
That’s pretty awful to be doing to people.
Wtf is wrong with you? Go and meet this person for coffee or a walk or something. You might like something about them. What are you afraid of?
Look the best thing that can happen is that if they don’t like you or you don’t like them you don’t meet again. Is that so bad? But to waste someone’s time by bailing like that is stupid, they could have scheduled to meet someone else who wasn’t as flaky.
Put yourself in their shoes...would you want someone to flake on you? Feeling a bit nervous is normal and healthy. Just gotta brace yourself and go!
yeah chief, you just gotta go. make it something easy like coffee so it’s easy to bail if it doesn’t go well.
Thanks for the responses guys! I am aware that it's a shitty thing to do, and the fact that this is all online let's me avoid awk confrontation. But idk why I feel like backing out. I'm single, and want to put myself out there...and these are guys that I am attracted to. But something just holds me back. ☹️
Have ya done some soul searching to think about why that might be? Do you maybe fear rejection a little bit like the best of us? Is there something you’d rather be doing? Or maybe you are a little intimidated by the prospect of talking to new folks one-on-one?
In any case, i hope it goes well for you if you do go, OP! And though online dating can be a good resource, also hope that you don’t feel like you should do it because a lot of other folks do or because you’re single. Peace!
Make yourself accountable to a friend, or double up. Really, you just have to push through and do it, but that could help
Tell someone about it. I always felt like I needed to go if a friend is likely to ask about it later. For me, once I went to that first ever date from an app, all the others felt so much easier!
Do you find yourself rescheduling bc there’s no attraction/connection there?
Not on dating apps, but feel the same way about networking events. Always want to cancel last minute but 90% of the time I go and end up having a good time. Everyone else is in the same position so you can do as much or as little as you want. I feel like this applies to a blind date just as much.
Hahaha I cancelled the first tinder date I had the day of because I was too scared... Now we've been dating for over a year. I know how scary it is but just force yourself to go, at least to one to start! Once you start meeting people, it gets way less scary. The other person is probably just as nervous about it too. I always liked the first date to be a pretty casual activity like getting coffee so it's easy to end quickly if you aren't feeling it. Personally, I didn't tell friends I was going on a date because that way, if it went badly, no one asked me about it.
Thanks guys! I think I'm just nervous that I'll be judged (looks better in photos, wasn't cool in person, etc). It's hard to put yourself out there.
I'm not fat or ugly! Atleast no one has ever told me I was lol
Thanks guys, you're correct. In the grand scheme of life, this is so meaningless. Nothing to stress about I guess! I just gotta get out of my comfort zone
Lmao any other alternatives?
rescheduling the day of?
"Reschedule" aka pretty much cancel lol