Has anyone who uses online dating apps connect with someone, set up a first date, and then get cold feet/raincheck/reschedule on the day of the date? Idk how to stop doing this 🙈🙈🙈

like
Posting as :
works at
You are currently posting as works at

Yea it’s called social anxiety. Get on lexapro

likefunny

Just go

like

The more you bail the easier it becomes to bail. Just gotta consciously break the cycle and maybe start with really non intimidating stuff like just a coffee or bubble tea

like

That’s pretty awful to be doing to people.

like

Wtf is wrong with you? Go and meet this person for coffee or a walk or something. You might like something about them. What are you afraid of?

Look the best thing that can happen is that if they don’t like you or you don’t like them you don’t meet again. Is that so bad? But to waste someone’s time by bailing like that is stupid, they could have scheduled to meet someone else who wasn’t as flaky.

likesmart

Put yourself in their shoes...would you want someone to flake on you? Feeling a bit nervous is normal and healthy. Just gotta brace yourself and go!

like

yeah chief, you just gotta go. make it something easy like coffee so it’s easy to bail if it doesn’t go well.

like

Thanks for the responses guys! I am aware that it's a shitty thing to do, and the fact that this is all online let's me avoid awk confrontation. But idk why I feel like backing out. I'm single, and want to put myself out there...and these are guys that I am attracted to. But something just holds me back. ☹️

like

Have ya done some soul searching to think about why that might be? Do you maybe fear rejection a little bit like the best of us? Is there something you’d rather be doing? Or maybe you are a little intimidated by the prospect of talking to new folks one-on-one?

In any case, i hope it goes well for you if you do go, OP! And though online dating can be a good resource, also hope that you don’t feel like you should do it because a lot of other folks do or because you’re single. Peace!

likeuplifting

Make yourself accountable to a friend, or double up. Really, you just have to push through and do it, but that could help

like

Tell someone about it. I always felt like I needed to go if a friend is likely to ask about it later. For me, once I went to that first ever date from an app, all the others felt so much easier!

like

Do you find yourself rescheduling bc there’s no attraction/connection there?

like

Not on dating apps, but feel the same way about networking events. Always want to cancel last minute but 90% of the time I go and end up having a good time. Everyone else is in the same position so you can do as much or as little as you want. I feel like this applies to a blind date just as much.

like

Hahaha I cancelled the first tinder date I had the day of because I was too scared... Now we've been dating for over a year. I know how scary it is but just force yourself to go, at least to one to start! Once you start meeting people, it gets way less scary. The other person is probably just as nervous about it too. I always liked the first date to be a pretty casual activity like getting coffee so it's easy to end quickly if you aren't feeling it. Personally, I didn't tell friends I was going on a date because that way, if it went badly, no one asked me about it.

uplifting

Thanks guys! I think I'm just nervous that I'll be judged (looks better in photos, wasn't cool in person, etc). It's hard to put yourself out there.

like

I'm not fat or ugly! Atleast no one has ever told me I was lol
Thanks guys, you're correct. In the grand scheme of life, this is so meaningless. Nothing to stress about I guess! I just gotta get out of my comfort zone

Lmao any other alternatives?

rescheduling the day of?

"Reschedule" aka pretty much cancel lol

Related Posts

Anyone have to determine collecting consent- both affirmative and negative (obviously stop at the no)? Can not find any directive or recital in GDPR/ or upcoming ePrivacy to decide on this paradox! Ie. Collecting 'no's' is or could be an important record of stop/start consent.

Looking for case/precedent or thoughts!

Ever tried Googling or even searching legal dBases for consent? Man- I don't need spanking and consensual yes v no consents for sex!

like

This guy I'm seeing occasionally complains about how toxic online dating is so I have tried to be considerate with him, i.e. be upfront and talk out any issues, treat him with kindness and provide reassurance I like him. But then he went ahead and completely updated his dating profile a couple days ago after I went home for the holidays... I'm a little hurt...

likefunny

Any F in nyc wanna hang out this weekend? 30 M here.

likefunny

It’s official that after 7 years I am now single in my late 30s…. Moments of excitement and moments sadness come and go. 🥂

like

Got asked out on a date. After I agreed he ghosted. It’s been 3 weeks and he just texted “Hey, sorry for the delay. I’m down to hang out anytime.” Is it even worth replying?

funny

If your girlfriend tells you she’s not feeling attractive, how would you react?

like

If you guys haven't tried online speed dating thefun.singles/chicago it's a blast. If you hate apps but also don't want to be out casual dating because of Covid, this is a lot of fun. Only wish I connected with more people in Chicago. A few were suburbs & other cities.

like

Is it weird to send a text the day after getting drinks with someone saying you enjoyed hanging out and want to hang out again?

Got drinks with a guy and it went incredibly well (talked for nearly 5 hours), but I met him in person instead of on an app (where meeting up is clearly defined as a date) so I’m not entirely sure if we both considered it a date? Don’t want to send a text and have him be weirded out, but also want to make it known that I want to be more than friends.

likefunny

So I met a girl on muzmatch and we’ve been talking for a little bit now. I like her a lot but often find myself leading every conversation and her questions to me are usually, “what about you?” type of deal and never something that I haven’t just asked her. It’s not like she doesn’t respond but I get the feeling that she’s not into me as much as I’m into her. Thoughts?

like

Single women, how do you prefer to meet men during these precarious times? Dating apps can be a slog. Any female fish here want to meet up for a drink? 33/M/recent transplant from NYC. Send me a DM!

like

Men in their 40s who are open to dating women in their 20s are a gigantic flaming red flag

likefunnysmartuplifting

Do men in their 30s actually want to settle down and get married? It seems like most are pretty happy with their single lifestyle. Asking as a 26F who is looking for commitment if I should even bother

likehelpful

I feel like I wouldn't get many tips as a server because I'm a guy, is this really true or am I just making it up?

like

Had a really intense 6 day fling with this guy who was visiting NYC for a week. Now he’s gone and I feel sad and longing for a relationship. Never had something like that before. Anyone else?

like

If two of you 🐠 can connect on here and plan a date within the next few days...I’ll pay! Cutest idea I get in my DMs wins!

likeuplifting

Men of FB, how did you girlfriends / wives sex drive change with age?

like

Where should you take someone on a first date? Not an app find or a hookup so want to do something nice. 28M

like

Visiting San Diego in a few weeks. Any F wants to meet and grab drinks ?

like

What is the etiquette for when someone offers to let you crash at their place for a night?

like

More Posts

Will hcl provide relocation amount? doj 20 jan

Is it safe to join CISCO? I have heard the layoffs happens there yearly.

like
like

To all the PwC'ers out there: how do you get rated as a high performer? Is that where they give you a 1 or a 2 rating?

like

@pwc tier three for manager -good or bad?

like

Spending my Sunday in the office. #busyseasonbreaks

like

Which cities or states would recommend to move to for Cleared Tech Professionals?

Besides DC, MD and VA. Currently live in that area now.

like

What to expect in Accenture joining kit for level 11

like

Is there any onsite opportunity or global exposure in Accenture Capability Network?

like

The amount of interest I’m gonna pay over the life of my home mortgage is disgusting.

like
like

What are some fun things your school has been doing to boost morale and/or help families?

likefunny

What do you think about Julian Sarafian’s story? If there’s anything to think about it

how much should we accept for moving to Singapore?

CCTC: 14.4 lpa
Have offer of 23 LPA in India

How much should I expect for Singapore company if planning to move with Family?

like

How often do you work from home?

I keep seeing new GD reviews about the company moving away from the hybrid work model and mandating RTO. Can any current employees explain what’s going on? I’m starting next month as a FT Director based in TX. Curious what the current remote (or lack of remote) climate is like and how employees are feeling about it.

Hi Fishes,
I am serving my notice period currently and 14 oct is my last working day.
I am having experience of 4.2 years in IT and 3 years + into front end development (REACTJS) and Im looking for good opportunities in the same field.
Please let me know if you have open vacancy and you can refer me for the same.

like

Bowl dedicated to IT industry memes. Invite your friend over here

What are the best Growth/VC firms in Canada?

like

Additional Posts in Unprofessional Topics 🙃

Any guys out there recommend a good place to get slim fit pants/jeans that are tapered/narrow at the bottom? Was thinking Zara or something but not sure. Can’t seem to find a great fitting pant

like

Has anyone been able to get their hands on a 3070,3080, or a rx 6800xt?? Starting to lose hope

like

If your girlfriend tells you she’s not feeling attractive, how would you react?

like

Everyone in my firm try so hard to be politically correct😍feel so included.

I recently made my insta public and now I’m getting all of these random followers. Is this normal? Bout to take my account back to private - I find this creepy...anyone else have this problem?

funny

People that take morning showers in the summer do y’all also take a night shower before bed to rinse off the sweat from the day?

like

All I ever wanted...

like

What is your take on calling your in-laws mom and dad?

like

Have you had a love at first sight moment at work? I think I had one today pls help

like