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I can't get out of bed today.
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Hey I know what this is like. You need to focus on what you went to that firm to do. If you feed into the fears you will manifest them into reality. If people hear/see you talk about it they will create situations in which they can watch that drama unfold for entertainment.
Focus and let your work and normal socializing speak for themselves. Don’t let your ghosts eat at you. Your mind will do what you train it to do.