Having an offshore lead undermine my asks and told me point blank they will not be able to do something the team already promised the client, and when I raised it on a team meeting it took said person

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They work for you? Then assert your authority and document.

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I don’t know the reporting structure, but if they have deadlines, state deadlines clearly and send to the whole team.

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I was in this situation so often i got tired talking about it. Short term: over CC managers on everything and don't spend your energy on it. One thing that helped me was to have offshore lead join client stand up. Let them own and communicate their failures and don't take it upon yourself.
Long term: RUN.

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5 seconds to change their mind after a male authority asked if that was truly the case. Also communicated that they have already received the items on their end and pending items on my end will not hold up their progress. Now they are telling me to write a follow up email to everyone on the team with all the pending items and wants to check the email before it goes out, when I have already communicate gaps to them throughout this entire week and their response is ‘our team is too busy to deal with this’.

Is the offshore lead the same rank as you? Do they report directly to you?

Step 1 - discuss it with the person on the phone (1:1) and immediately, do not let it sit. Directly ask why they changed their tune when the male asked them why they wouldn't meet the deadline (but I would say the male's name, and not make it a gender issue yet, even if it may be)

Step 2 - as their manager clearly explain your expectations from the overseas team (both in the first call and a follow up email)

Step 3 - document and discuss with your project lead. Tell them you don't want them to step in now, share your approach to solving, and tell them you will let them know if the behavior continues

If there are no changes and this behavior continues, then ask the engagement / project lead to speak to the overseas person about their behavior.

Confrontation is hard. You can do this!

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