Hey Fam - What are tips you use to avoid conflict/arguments when leisure-traveling with your significant other?

As an experienced traveller/road warrior , I find myself having to dial back on my pace/preferences ALOT to keep good vibes.

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Single biggest tip: agree that you can do activities separately or otherwise not be together 100% of the trip! Inevitably, someone will be tired or hungry while the other person wants to spend more time at the beach/museum/whatever. Letting one person grab a snack/break/etc while the other person doesn't is the best of both worlds. It will allow both to do what they want, and give space to avoid getting into arguments. Same thing if you disagree on what to see or do. You can visit different museums at the same time.

Others:
Involve your SO in trip itinerary planning early on. This way, you align on what you want to see earlier and with calm minds. Record the itinerary in a Google doc or other format easy to share/access in your destination. This will help prevent you from being blamed for dominating planning or not giving the SO input about what to see when/where or where to stay.

While doing planning, talk about your high level goals. If you expect a leisurely trip vs a do everything on bucket list trip, or party vs Beach, or whatever else then you need to figure out a compromise.

Make sure your SO has Global Entry (which includes tsa precheck) to spend less time in lines.

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This is called communication, D1.

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Depends on if you are man or woman, if you are a man just say yes to that woman please! A trip is to be enjoyed and not for argument’s. Her win is your win if it a loving relationship!

Signed Happily married OG

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OP, I think what’s at the root of this advice is if your partner tends to be more particular or high maintenance, let them lead the way because they will likely fight you on everything if you don’t and it’s just not worth it if it’s not that big of a deal to you in the first place.

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I don’t have advice, but every long term relationship breakup I’ve had was due to issues that presented themselves while traveling together. 100% of them. It just took months (or years 😬) for it to play out. So yeah…worth attention.

Pace was one of the issues (me being the more active one also played out in career, finances, fitness). You can dial your pace back, but mutual resentment can grow unless you’re truly comfortable flying back from wherever not having seen 2 or 3 things you wanted to see. It’s a hard thing to get on the same page on unless both of you are cool doing solo stuff on trips.

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And this is why I travel within the first 90 days. What we are not about to do is waste each other's time. I dont know why or how, but without fail, travel brings it ALL out.

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I don't. I've thrown in the towel long ago and accepted that travel with her means arguments until we get where we're going

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I can settle for this too 😂

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Is this a communication, collaboration issue? A leisure trip should be just that... fun and enjoyable. Why conflict and arguments? 😳

This is an opportunity to blend travel styles, excursions of interest etc. and collaborate to create a trip where each person gets a piece of what they value + experience something new that's of value to the other person. It could be an immersive, experiential, learning experience.

That said, traveling with someone tells me all I need to know about alignment of values for the long-term 👀🚩

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Yes travel tells a lot of the journey, quite literally.

Nothing wrong with healthy compromise (emphasis on healthy), but if there’s serious conflict past that you should take it as a sign as to what future outlook of the relationship looks like in a sense.

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