{ "media_type": "text", "post_content": "Hey fish, need some career advice. I recently got promoted to senior! We have been working on a client deliverable to close a project and my current engagement has two made directors who I work with directly( one just got promoted from SM this July ) . During one of our discussions in putting this doc together, I may have come out as “aggressive”/“opinionated . I’m generally the quiet one , asking for feedback and listening in mostly. I didn’t realize it in the moment but at that point (contd)", "post_id": "60fcc30b6bd41600245b4ba0", "reply_count": 7, "vote_count": 2, "bowl_id": "59e88be7e2808e00149b0443", "bowl_name": "Women In Consulting" }

Hey fish, need some career advice. I recently got promoted to senior! We have been working on a client deliverable to close a project and my current engagement has two made directors who I work with directly( one just got promoted from SM this July ) . During one of our discussions in putting this doc together, I may have come out as “aggressive”/“opinionated . I’m generally the quiet one , asking for feedback and listening in mostly. I didn’t realize it in the moment but at that point (contd)

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I think a single instance is not a big deal. If you are someone that tends to interrupt and cut people off or bulldoze over people, I would suggest worrying less about a single instance and focus more on working on that behavior. I think it isn’t respectful personally to interrupt people, but I can do it myself too. If I notice I did it… I’ll sometimes stop myself and say “I’m sorry, I interrupted you. What were you saying?” It’s better to catch yourself right afterwards than not at all, in my opinion.

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I struggle with that too! I so often think… oh they probably just don’t understand so I need to explain it more so they get it. I’m happy to accept a difference of opinion but I’m not sure they really “heard” me so I keep pushing. Earlier in my career, I finally had my boss tell me… “I understand you are saying X, and I see your point, but we are doing Y.” It kind of hit me that people usually do hear me even if they don’t parrot it back… they just disagree and in need to accept that. If I really feel there is additional information they need I’ll try to give it in a super respectful way making it clear I’m happy to defer to them, but just want them to be aware of something. “I’m happy to go with that path. Just so you know, doing that would mean we wouldn’t be able to cover this other thing. Are you okay with that?”

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(Contd) I continued on with the meeting . Later when I realized how I may have come across , I reached out to one of them on chat and in the middle of another conversation asked if I had come off as aggressive but he didn’t ack or anything and continued on(in his defense we were talking about the project so he just replied to that) . I’ve once been penalized for something like this(cutting someone off and being a little rude in front of other people ) in my previous org (back in my home country , I’m an immigrant) . So now I’m really stressing about this and don’t know what else to do! The directors I work with are mostly nice people, straightforward, no bs kinda people. Any suggestions?

Eh. Just don’t over think it. One time is no big deal

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