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Additional Posts in Consulting Moms
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Ok guys. I just took reg and honestly WTF.
New onboardings are in office now?
Tying out workpapers like....
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I tried. It didn’t help. My kids get so much crap from our extended family. I donate what we don’t need (aka what I don’t like) and put some in a box to give them throughout the year. That box of extra toys has really come in handy during quarantine!
You’re lucky, nobody buys toys for my kid besides 🤦🏻♀️
I definitely told our family members that while we appreciate it, we don’t have room/don’t want to overwhelm her with toys...My daughters bday is next week and I basically “guided” our family in what they can get her, an Amazon wish list is a good way to do this. I also just say no, my MIL wanted to get her a huge doll house and I just told her we don’t have space and the dog would end up eating the little pieces. If they send things that are not right I either put them away till she is ready or donate them immediately.
That’s a great idea M1. However in my case, anything sent by in laws my husband doesn’t fuss about but when my parents send/gift he continues to say mom dad shouldn’t send everytime.. this and that.. just happened recently on my daughter’s 1st birthday..
Pro
Start asking for experiences. Especially if you can include the gift giver. Ask them to support music or dance or gymnastics class. A zoo or museum membership. Then invite the gift giver to join for recitals or a day at the zoo. Family photo session, then send them framed photos as thank you.
Pro
My MIL is a shopaholic and has bought more stuff for my baby than I have, and it annoys me because 1) it’s stuff we neither need nor want 2) we live in a small apartment 3) it takes away the chance for me to buy that special birthday outfit or milestone toy etc. It sounds petty but it really drives me nuts because I see it as wasteful and unnecessary and I don’t want my child growing up expecting gifts all the time. Plus, it’s unfair to MY mom who doesn’t buy stuff or see him as often. I always tell her not to buy stuff but she doesn’t listen. FWIW the pandemic has stopped her from shopping so much recently. 😂
Yes I can donate and regift but it’s annoying to have to deal with this problem in the first place.
M2 ditto!! I have the same issue!! My parents are conservative when it comes to spending and rather give me cash to buy something of my choice and need than just send whatever they like, which my MIL does.. and honestly I dislike that.. I’m indian and before my baby was born MIL brought gold bangles for her and says put them on her when you see her first thing after delivery 🤯 which obviously I didn’t!
My in laws are like many described above. I donate some toys and rotate out others. I just keep thinking that it’s their love language to give gifts and that I would rather have them involved and supporting in a way that feels good to them, rather than shutting down their efforts.
..we need to tell family they can send gifts/toys for the kids on birthdays and Christmas only. Have any of you had to have this talk with family and how did you go about it?
Rising Star
Yes, we have never told people to stop buying her things. If I don’t like them or don’t think they’re age appropriate, they get donated or put away in the basement until she’s bigger. Gives us some toys to rotate in and out and keep them all ‘exciting’ to her. You don’t have to have everything out just because it was given! If I received a huge doll house I couldn’t use, it’d be in my basement until my daughter is ready for it. Then one rainy afternoon when she’s climbing up the walls, poof- dollhouse appears. Now, if it’s extremely excessive that’s a problem but I would guess maybe their enthusiasm will die down a bit as your child gets older?
Rising Star
Face time with them while the kid opens it
I made it clear people could buy anything they wanted, but we purge & donate quarterly, so no hurt feelings if their purchases end up at Goodwill.