{ "media_type": "text", "post_content": "Hi all. If you have ever encountered passive aggressive teammates, did you raise this situation to your direct report? If so, what was your approach and how did you deliver the feedback? This particular teammate is beginning to create a toxic work environment for me and I would like to diffuse this situation amicably, as performance reviews are near.", "post_id": "61a6b34256551e0034be67f7", "reply_count": 7, "vote_count": 3, "bowl_id": "5de0ca57b629fb0028032227", "bowl_name": "Black in Tech" }

Hi all. If you have ever encountered passive aggressive teammates, did you raise this situation to your direct report? If so, what was your approach and how did you deliver the feedback? This particular teammate is beginning to create a toxic work environment for me and I would like to diffuse this situation amicably, as performance reviews are near.

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I usually just try to ignore the other person’s efforts to make me feel uncomfortable. I wonder if you could mention it to your direct report and they could talk to your teammate about the effect their attitude is having on the team dynamic as a whole so you don’t end up feeling singled out.

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The best thing, I’ve learned, to deal with passive aggression is don’t engage. They’re usually trying to get a rise out of you or whoever it’s aimed at. Alternatively, you can always professionally and courteously ask them “oh, ok, what do you mean?”… “can you elaborate?” And if they’re just have a general passive aggressive-y vibe.. not necessarily saying something ask “is something wrong?” Delivery is important bc if it comes across as kindness and genuine curiosity, you’ve called their bluff on their aggression w/o fighting fire with fire, and that it’s something you won’t tolerate. I’d still bring it up to my direct report either way.

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This, 100%

Ugh, been there, done that. It's so hard because you don't want to come off like a snitch or that you're overly sensitive. In my situation, I ended up quitting because I couldn't take the toxicity anymore. But if I decided to stay, I would have followed the advice of someone above who suggested not engaging, if possible. Think about them as a bully. If they fail to get a rise out of you, they'll eventually lose interest and focus their attention elsewhere. Good luck to you, whatever you decide.

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