Hi everyone! I recently accepted a new job with a Big 4 and am also newly engaged.

I have a couple of concerns… the main one being that I may not have enough time off for 2022 to cover taking off for the wedding, honeymoon, and then a couple of other weddings where I’m supposed to be a bridesmaid. Do you think there would be any wiggle room with managers allowing time off, or is it generally pretty strict? (Continued in comments)

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Tbh from someone who is ex-B4, I’m not sure I would have taken a B4 job while trying to plan a wedding. I was well-established and it was difficult to squeak out the time I needed. I don’t mean to be a Debbie Downer but it’s going to be rough even if you don’t consider the impact of less PTO.

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Thanks for the response! I’m confident it will all work out, but let me know if you have any tips for how you were able to navigate this since I have already taken the job.

Consider delaying your honeymoon to a later time. A lot of people do that anyway so they don’t have to deal with the stress of planning a big trip at the same time as their wedding. And maybe duck out of one of those other weddings if they’re going to require travel, bachelorette parties with travel, etc.

I’m all for taking personal time and setting your boundaries early on, but be careful about doing “too much too soon” and giving your new managers any reason to think you’re not willing to put in the time.

Also, you didn’t mention your age, or how far down the road you are in wedding planning, but if there’s no specific reason to get married in 2022, maybe consider a 2023 wedding (added bonus is that you’ll have better venue options when you plan farther in advance, and we have to hope that COVID will be less of an issue at that point too).

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Delaying the honeymoon may be the best bet. Thanks!

So the first year at Deloitte at least you get a “free pass” on utilization, I’d take advantage of that and use up all your PTO

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Make sure you understand the performance year calendar; they don’t always align to the calendar year.

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The second concern is around how taking all of this time off will affect utilization. My current firm doesn’t focus on utilization too much, but it sounds like it’s much more demanding at a Big 4. I’m obviously nervous about doing well in my first year and don’t want my reputation or rating to be harmed if I take off too much time.

Thanks in advance for any help!

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Love the idea mentioned above of a delayed honeymoon. If you haven’t booked yet, you could always try to book around a holiday so it’s less PTO and not as impactful on your work.

For the other weddings you’ll be in, you could always consider flying in on an evening and working from another location during the day - for example fly in Thursday night and work from the hotel Friday, if needed. That way you don’t have to take additional time off, if possible.

Just a few ideas as food for thought! Also, CONGRATULATIONS on your engagement 🎉🥂 and have SO much fun planning the wedding. It SUCH a fun time and experience. Wishing you all the best on all of your new adventures 💕

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Thank you so much!! This is such a helpful and kind response. I appreciate it!

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Don’t you get annual leave?

I negotiated it before I joined. Said, I’m coming in but taking 3 full weeks off after a few months. The hiring partner gave my approval and helped navigate.

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