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Yes! I live on the east coast, bf on the west coast. We met in CA when I worked there. I thought I would stay in CA forever, but moved home to ny just in time to quarantine with family during the pandemic for what I thought would only be short term.
I was planning to move back to CA, and so sure of it, and unexpectedly realized I’d rather be here in NY. Then just as I made that realization, he had to move back to the east coast for work!
You never know how life can change ❤️
This was really nice to hear ❤️❤️
Have 2 homes and split your time according to best season for each coast!
Pro
I don’t know how old you are, but can you really decide your whole life just like that? How do either of you know what will happen in 5 years, 15 years, 30 years? So much can change, circumstances change, people’s needs change, personalities even change. If you really see a life with this person, I wouldn’t consider this a relationship-ending issue. You can figure it out in the years ahead and find some compromise as you grow together.
Kind of. My partner originally wanted to move out to the west coast together (we are both east coast natives but our home states are far apart). I was down to go with him to build a future together. Eventually I brought up the fact that I would rather be on the east coast to be closer to my family, and he felt the exact same way but was scared to tell me so. We are on the same page now — goal is to move together to an east coast city midway between our home towns. I guess in my case, being honest but showing that I am open to hearing him out worked, and luckily we had been feeling the same way.
If either of you wanna move to either coast but can still work where you do want to work in terms of you like the company and everything you’re seeking for then that’s good. But you have to make sure you’re both making equal efforts in trying to see what works out for both of you guys. If you’re the only one looking up jobs on one coast and he’s not then that’s a red flag. Also if you truly enjoy working where you are and the people and your career is heading in the direction you anticipated then I wouldn’t leave just because unless your company is a remote job then that solves itself. Either way I wouldn’t move for anyone unless I truly wanted to because then it’s a lot of pressure on the relationship itself. Your personal goals, lifestyle, and relationship should have some sort of balance.
Yes. I left him. And carried on with my life. He decided a few years later he wanted to live near me and moved.
Pro
How long have you been together? And are budgets ever an issue?
My boyfriend is bicoastal and we make it work. But to be honest, it only works because I’m independent and have work flexibility, and because he’s very wealthy (never have to think about traveling to and from—and comfortably in first—and we vacation together a lot). Very importantly, he wants to make NYC his homebase once his kids graduate high school. Right now he’s here 1 week out of the month. So there’s consistency and light at the end of the tunnel.
I wouldn’t do it with anyone else.