Hi ladies, looking for some advice. One of the managers from the client side can be very rude and condescending towards me sometimes. For example, on a call this morning, he said “I don’t (cont’d)

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I think it’s best to escalate to your project management first and let them address it with the client. If it comes from your partner, it’s likely going to be more effective. It’s totally unacceptable for your client to do this, but you still have to play the game to get the right results. Good luck!

likesmart

The first thing you should put right at the forefront of your mind is that anyone being nasty is usually coming from their own stress, insecurity, or need to be in control. In other words, him being nasty has nothing to do with you. Since he’s the client, it’s important he feels comfortable with your ability to understand, but don’t get defensive. Just stop, take a breath and say “ok, let’s take a step back. What are you concerned about and what’s your main objective here?” Sometimes the feeling “she doesn’t understand me” can come from you guys having different thinking preferences. Don’t let him get to you.

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Loop in project management but also your people manager. People tend to twist women's behavior based on how they feel about successful women

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Think you’re understanding what needs to be done” in a very nasty tone. I’ve noticed he’s never talked to any of the male consultants on my team like this. At first I thought it was in my head until his own team members (also from the client side) told me he only talks to her like that as well because she noticed how he treats me! What is the best way to handle this? Do I just ignore it? It’s difficult because he is the client.

I’m going through the same issue. One of the external contractors in the proj is trying to undermine my work. He is a male with like 30 years of work ex. He doesn’t do this to other male managers. I have been trying to make peace with it past one year and I’m out of patience. Leadership is aware of this, but I’m not sure if I should press them to take it up with client. This is really bothering me from a long time!

Hi OP, I know how you feel. I have something I learnt from my mentors - if it makes you uncomfortable, its worth a conversation. Even if your partner didn’t see anything etc. maybe try to see it from that lens

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