Highly recommend learning your attachment style and emotional mindfulness before stepping into a new relationship or trying to date. I have an avoidant attachment style and finally acknowledged how I was showing up in relationships, which wasn’t contributing to the healthy relationships I said I wanted. I spent most of this year doing a lot of inner work and met an amazing guy with a secure attachment. Our relationship is healthy with a strong foundation.

likeuplifting
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Does he have a secure sister? I’ve done a ton of work too, and also tend to be avoidant…still searching for the secure companion.

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Of course they are! They’re secure! Haha

funny

Congratulations.

Thanks 😊

Where did you start? I’m pretty sure this is me and I’d like to work on it.

I read Attached, which was helpful but the author recently acknowledged the bias the book has towards people with avoidant attachment. It didn’t seem to think avoidant people were as open to changing. Then I got an attachment theory workbook and it was helpful for identifying my own behavioral patterns and thought processes. Lastly I bought Loving Like You Mean It and it was very insightful for unpacking my thoughts, feelings and behaviors. Good luck!

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I agree with you. Self-awareness goes hand in hand with self-love.

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