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Faux pas to invite adult children on the same invite as their parents, and this is why š¬ if you can let it slide I would, otherwise reach out and say the invite was intended only for the addressees.
People have done it to us a bunch as āthe LASTNAME familyā a bunch, in this same family. Not too worried, they care way more about reducing paper and are probably mad we didnāt do E-vites. I think etiquette only goes so far, you need to know your audience as well. There were some who we sent the cousins invites separately but also to the parents address.
I donāt think inviting the two of them on the same invite is what caused the complicated RSVP, because they would have done it either way.
Either way, Iām not looking for unsolicited opinions on how to send invites, but moreso wondering how other people may have handled sending an invite to Person A and getting an RSVP for Person A and B, when B is not invited. We have 220 on our guest list and expected some no RSVPs to get us to 200 on our venue limit. We also told others they could not bring plus ones, so it would be really unfair of us to let this slide even if the numbers work out.
Are they closer to your parents (or your fiancĆ©ās parents)? If so, can they have the conversation on your behalf?