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Interesting you’ve shared very specific wants of your husband but more general hesitation for yourself. What do YOU want?
I want children - I’m not fixated so much on what age I become a parent. I’d be fine from 29-35 being the start. I think I feel guilty pushing it because we both want a stay at home parent for the first few years, and it would be him. I’m really into my career and make twice his salary. He’s a teacher and would rather be home if we chose to have the kids. I like to think I’d be a great parent who could raise some amazing kids that would do incredible things in their lives… it feels also like I work so hard and am doing financially well so young that I should share this with the next generation.
I didn’t 100% know until my baby was born. I delayed having kids because I thought there’d be a moment when I was sure, but I never was. I finally decided to take the plunge. The first time I held my baby I was sure.
This is so beautiful and encouraging! May I ask how long you waited? My Mom was 36 and my Dad 46 when I was born, so I have always thought I could really start anytime. My husband’s parents were 21 when he was born, so I think he has it in his head he needs to make this choice ASAP one way or the other. It’s hard for him to imagine a baby being born past him being 34 or 35.
I was totally unmaternal - kind of beside myself when I found out at 26 that I was pregnant a few months after getting married and I cried the first day my husband went back to work after giving birth because I had not idea what to do with a newborn. Fast forward - I thank God everyday for the "mistake". I fell head over heels in love with my baby, quit my job and stayed home for 10 years. Being a mom has been THE best and most defining role of my life and I can't imagine not having a child. I never had the courage to go for a second child - no regrets on that either. I would never have predicted the feelings I had about being a mother. Best of luck.