How did you set a wedding budget? I’m so stressed at planning. I’ve got a huge family so need at least 125 invites (with few friends invited). God why is this an event that is so normal / expected

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How much we could save every month during our 10 months engagement while maxing out 401ks and other investments and inviting all our family and friends.
Number came to $50k with 250 guests for 2 days of party.
We paid for all the expenses of our 12 bridal party - they just had to show up. $50k includes honeymoon.

We received all of the items on our registry (100 items) and $5,000 in cash from our guests.

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You cannot budget without a location but you also can’t choose a location without a budget so it helps to have a “goal budget” going in (even if based on almost nothing), then let that help guide a place. Once you have that you can ACTUALLY budget looking at average prices in the area.

Big tip- don’t stress, don’t over-plan up front. Keep the happy times going and hire a planner/coordinator if needed. They won’t make decisions for you, but they’ll keep you focused.

You deserve to be happy aside from all the familial stress. “Weddiculous” is a book to help on perspective. Keep smiling!!

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And for perspective we pulled off a 50 person wedding celebration over three days in a pandemic for $20k. It is what you make it- just pick the top three things YOU and your S/O want to prioritize then let the other things be small. We wanted great food (6k), beautiful decor (2k) and to celebrate over a few days... we decided to forget the flowers (Trader Joe’s is fine day-of) and cake (chocolate chip cookies instead! Looking at options had we not prioritized I would’ve spent at least $40k

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There are some good online calculators that help you estimate a percentage of what each “element” should be in your budget (Ie. Some may say 20% for flowers). I would definitely encourage looking at all of the categories because so many little details add up REAL fast. For example, I started by saying I wanted venue/food/beverages/service & gratuities to be 35k all in, thinking that would be 90% of my budget, which was very naive of me. We’re now at ~70k all said and done (invite list 200+ in HCOL), but I’m very happy with all of the decisions we’ve made.

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We could’ve spent like 50,000, but we chose to spend 10k. He has a family of over 120 people and I have a family of 20. We decided to just do are immediate families and grandparents and some friends, a total of 40 people for an entire weekend at the lake where we got to have I campfire one night, boating and kayaking and hiking another day, a Jacuzzi another day, time with every single person who came to the wedding. Nothing was a quick hello nice to see you thank you for coming. We got solid memories with everyone.  The wedding itself and reception were absolutely magical and fairytale like and perfect. 

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I think in the post covid world actually it should be pretty easy to make it only a smaller wedding. Who wants to spend all that money and do all that planning only to have it cancelled and rescheduled three times. Just plan something small with family soon.

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