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it’s h word hours i fear 🥹🥹😴
Unpopular opinion: Hookup culture is wack.
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Chief
All together or else it’s not a real marriage? Just my opinion.
Pro
We do not. My spouse and I keep separate checking / savings accounts but name each other as beneficiaries on all our accounts. We agree how to split the bills, and this split changes over time.
Same.
My dad and his partner still have their own separate checking accounts that they use for “personal stuff” they want to buy, like clothes, electronics, if one goes out for dinner/drinks without the other, etc.
But they also have a joint credit card that they use for household expenses and “shared experience” stuff like date nights, vacations, etc. At the end of the month, they split that credit card bill in half.
They’ve been together 17 years and rarely fight about money. I don’t know what they do wrt savings though lol.
Regardless of whether you combine accounts, it’s important that you develop a budget and a financial plan together.
I think joint accounts make that easier, but to each their own.
Joint account for my spouse and me. We get an equal allowance of $500 each (we buy whatever we want, surprise each other).
Bonuses: no matter who receives it, we each take 10%, donate 10% and save 70%. We are a Team and we operate as one with our finances. We are open about it.
Absolutely, D1. We talk about it all the time. We set savings and investment goals first before we do anything else and we check in on those goals with each other.
Enthusiast
My last relationship we had joint finances and it caused a lot of fights, both of us were bad with money and we’d both spend money and then get pissed over each other spending our money. Even if you share responsibility for paying bills etc it would be best to let whoever actually pays the bills collect money from the other one rather than share an account. Or maintain separate accounts and keep a household account that is strictly for bills that you both contribute to. A lot of it depends too on the income disparity between the two of you, it is easier when you both make close to the same amount and much harder when one makes more than the other because the one making more feels like they contribute more and should be in more control.
Rising Star
Wife and I have done it every way possible. When we started living together (before marriage) we had separate accounts and a joint account for bills. We’d auto transfer a certain amount each check to the joint account, and then pay bills out of the joint account. Eventually that, along with all of our separate credit cards, it became too many accounts to manage. So we took turns paying off credit cards (one of hers, one of mine, etc). Then we combined our checking and savings. Today, we have just one checking and one savings account, and we use one credit card for our daily spending. We pay that off at the end of every month.
As for a budget or discussing what we spend, I keep a close watch on the spending from the app on my phone. We check in every week or so. I often make multiple credit card payments per month. This helps us keep a more real time watch on how much we are spending, that way we don’t get 30 days down the road and find ourselves shocked at how much we spent.
Enthusiast
Three accounts:
1. Joint
2. One for me
3. One for her
All house related costs are slightly weighed heavier on me bc of higher salary. Everything else is split equal.
Been together for 6 years and very happy. Everyone has there own style but this way works well for us for a number of reasons. The main one is that there is a perceived sense of autonomy. (E.g. If I want a fancy computer or if she wants nice clothing, there cannot be any veto power etc.).
Completely separate finances. We take turns paying my mortgage and the bills are split. We contribute somewhat equally to vacations.
Both went through financially messy divorces and are obsessed with protecting what is ours.
Sometimes I'm ok with it, sometimes I wonder if having a roommate + tinder hookups would be better.
Yes. I'm not sure why.
Pro
Just know if you intermingle your finances and end up getting divorced, it can be ugly.
A solution I’ve heard to this is keeping separate accounts but contributing the same amount of money monthly to a joint account for the family
Conversation Starter
I hate this place
Not married yet but we plan on combining. He's a lot better with money mgmt / investing so I'm okay with just using a CC lol
Chief
Have one joint checking acct. One joint savings account. Another joint check acct for money from rental property. And one acct in my name because we were separated at one point and were in process of dividing financials but ended up reconciling. All at the same bank and money can be transferred from any acct to another.
Each of us auto deposit $200 to savings from each paycheck which usually ends up being used for life stuff but sometimes it builds up.
$50 is our “you don’t have to consult me” spend limit.
Combined. Everything goes into our joint checking account and we have a couple of credit cards that we use. We have always been very open about money and spending decisions have just never been an issue since we communicate openly.
We have our own broker accounts, joint broker accounts, separate checking and a joint checking. The separate stuff are account we had before we got married that we still keep separate at the moment. Might change in the future but I like having his her and ours. No issues 2 years in
Separate, but we go through our expenses at the end of the month and settle up. There is transparency on where we are spending money. We also make the same, if things were to change one of us decides to be a stay at home parent, etc we would likely change our approach to expenses.
We don’t have children yet, but that will also probably shift our approach
so both our paychecks go into the same account. Then we each get the same "allowance" for our own stuff (make up, eating out separately, fantasy football etc..) Its nice because we are both respectful of each others job and income and my husband didnt need to know how much my dyson air wrap costed. The exact allowance is super flexible sometimes we use more, sometimes we use less. Anything for a joint expense (vacation, furniture etc..) thats over $500 we consult each other