How do you balance taking initiative with not appearing desparate? 3 dates with this guy I like but he is low energy when not in person, coordinating meets is hard. Always been like this so not(contd)

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He's probably talking to a few guys at once. It's exhausting chatting up three guys over text at the same time vs giving one cutie all my attention in person

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He asked me this question himself and said that he isn't seeing anyone himself! Don't think he is the lying kind but again..

Don't waste your time with mixed signals.

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I guess, the thing is this seems worth pursuing compared to my other dates, but I want to do it right and smart!

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Would recommend driving 1-3 more dates if you see real potential. As someone who was on the other side but now in my forever relationship, it can take a little while to mutually click!

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That he is necessarily seeing someone else, but I don't know whether I should be more strategic/coy or just keep being genuine. He is indeed affectionate and nice when in person..so confused.

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How’s the sex?

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Scroll below ;) on this thread.

I’d put it back on him to arrange the next date. What else do you consider is low energy about him other than difficulty coordinating when to hang out again? Like...lack of texting or talking on the phone? If so, some people are just really bad at that

I don’t like feeling like I need to drive everything in a relationship, personally. I think it might say something how they might be with other things in life.

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Good point! He always has all these ideas when we meet but it's mostly upto me to make them happen. How would you set him up to arrange something without the risk of making everything just stop and fizzle out?

He was the one who had asked me out in a coffee shop ... 🤷🏽‍♂️

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How long has it been? 3 dates across what time span?

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I was in exact situation as you. Great in person, sex was wonderful (best I ever had and he agreed too), but low energy when not in person and I was always the one driving dates and it was always difficult to coordinate meets. After ~3 months, and he was still vague / not willing to commit to exclusive dating/a relationship, I moved on. OP, maybe give it some more time, and then ask if he wants to move to next level. If not, don't waste more time.

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