How is divorce perceived back in India - specifically in a traditional, Hindu, South Indian family? I’m a 29/F/ABCD/divorcee who is currently going out with a Telegu guy.

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Fuck all that - as someone who is going through a ugly divorce I am just glad you found someone and are moving on...the rest is all just formality

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Since you are his path to GC, he will be fine

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I think it’s going to be a little rough OP but even in arranged marriages Indian parents enact theatricals. So just don’t worry about what you can’t control and make sure you’re in sync with what your boyfriend says/does.

uplifting

Perception :

Divorced = Something is wrong with the divorcée

likeuplifting

These days parents are well educated and accepts these things. But again it depends how your BF present you to them. I have seen atleast 2 cases where the girl was divorcee and was engaged again with no issues. So all the best.

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IMO, Some conservative families have very strong opinions of divorced women compared to divorced men. The automatic thought is if a man is divorced, there must have been something wrong with the woman he was married to. If a woman is divorced, there is obviously something wrong with the woman herself that her marriage wasn’t successful. Don’t come back bashing at my comment here because this is not what I believe. I’m speaking purely from what I’ve seen being on both sides of it through my family members and friends.

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OP More power to you. Hugs 🤗 You got this.

uplifting

Fully will depend on his parents upbringing. Are they in a city or a remote part ? How educated are they ? So on and so forth. When I was looking for matches I was open to speaking to divorces and my mom was cool about it too. I am Telugu / Brahmin. Both parents middle class educated but grew up in city.

uplifting

Leave the problem to him and let him manage his side. This depends on how he manages information and people as this is a very complex issue in south indian traditional families.

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This is very sensitive information which has to be contexulized and controlled appropriately by your fiance and you. ( Assuming he is going to your fiance)

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He is planning on breaking the news to them when he goes back to visit for holidays this December. Should I expect all hell to break loose? My parents already know about him and are ok with the situation but I’m so scared/worried what will come out on his side :(

Why does he have to tell his parents that you were married once ?

IMO it's not a bad idea to not tell them now. If they figure out years from now and they realize you are living a happy life, they probably won't care much.

But, if they realize before marriage, it might get a big ugly. As long as your social media is clear and you have a good closed friends and family to support this decision, you should be fine not telling them about this.

For Telugu family citizenship of United States would trumpets all your past. There is reason he chose to be with beyond the love part

Dear D5 and SA1 looks like you have come from another planet.

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Hello People,
Looking for advice based on experience. Currently living with in-laws that have come to support us with our first baby. My in-laws and I have had a rocky start to our relationship due to ours being an inter-religion marriage. Many things have been said that I’m neither able to forgive nor forget. I have a very kind husband who understands my sentiments but wants to try to have a cordial relationship with them now for the sake of our baby (and baby’s relationship with grandparents)

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